Scars of the Black Rose
by Flying Zuccini
Summary: Ginny and Draco have more in common than they ever would have imagined. Can they help each other to stop doing what they do? rated for self-mutilation. please don't read if you will get triggered completed, edited and reposted. Please read chapter 1
1. Introduction

**PLEASE READ **

**This is a warning that you need to read before you begin this story.**

Please read the WHOLE thing.

Ok, so here I am, four years later going through this story again. I haven't read it in practically forever but I still remember what it meant to me at the time. I'm not rewriting it, just patching it up. I was 13/14 then and my spelling was even worse than it is now. The story is full of mistakes and I wanted to try and fix them all.

To anyone who read this story before, I want to say thank you. The support that all of you gave me really helped me to quit cutting. I hope that most of you are free of that addiction as well now. I can't thank you all enough for the encouragement you gave me. I hope that you all know that you probably saved my life, this story saved my life.

Thank you even to those who wrote me flames and said that I was going to trigger people with this. You gave me insight. I don't believe that anyone should be triggered by this story. I like to think that most people know themselves pretty well and if they think they are going to be triggered will stay away after seeing the warning.

I'm not going to say that this story is just for cutters...but it kind of is. From my experience...its hard to read stories about it (especially one this graphic) if you aren't a cutter. For those of you who don't cut and are planning on reading...be careful. I started cutting because I read about it in fanfiction, I don't know that I ever would have started otherwise.

Also, if you're a recovering cutter, be careful as well. I wrote this story, and I've been having trouble going through it to edit without being triggered. Halfway through chapter eleven I had to stop, take a few deep breaths and have a cigarette before I could continue to read it. I just want to warn you, if you are recovering and not 100 sure that you're going to be able to read without being triggered, please **DON'T** try to.

I received comments for this story saying that it was disgusting, that all Draco and Ginny did was cut and help each other to do it. That it went back and forth like this for half of the story to the point where it looked like the plot was never going to go anywhere. This isn't true! That's not what I was trying to show. This story is about the **STRUGGLE** of quitting. It's about how you may fall back when you're trying and that you need good friends to stand by and help you along the way. Nobody is perfect and a cutting addiction is as legitimate as a drug addiction. Do drug addicts not relapse? Do friends not help each other to get drugs and help to quit drugs? It does have a good and moral ending (I swear!)

I wish I could actually speak and personally thank all of the people who wrote me reviews, sent me emails, encouraged me and shared their stories. I feel overwhelmed and emotional when I go through the reviews and emails (I have hundreds of them in a folder on my hotmail). If anyone out there wants to talk, **PLEASE** send me an email or a review, because I would love to speak with **ANY** of you. I made some good friends on here four years ago, and I've lost touch with every single one.

**PLEASE**

Pay attention to all of these warnings.

I could never forgive myself if something that I wrote was the cause of anyone going through what I, and so many other readers, have gone through.

In any case, please enjoy the story and let me know what you think.


	2. Chapter 1

AN (2007): Ok, I'm finally going through all of this mess to try and edit out some of the mistakes.

AN: So yeah, I'm really sorry that I deleted all of my other stuff, some of you might be kind of mad about that, but I doubt it. It's not like anyone was really reading it much anyway. I'm hoping that I don't lose interest in this story, although I don't think I will. I've wanted to write a story like this for a long time. Hopefully a bit darker than what I've written before.

So yeah, this story will eventually be D/G, but for now it's nothing really.

The rating is PG-13 for language and self-mutilation.

Disclaimer: Yes, really, I do own Harry Potter, that is why, you see, I am sitting around writing fanfiction about my own books.Yeah, right, I don't own it, just borrowing, so don't sue me, sound good?

Chapter 1

Ginny Weasley stormed through the halls between the Potions Lab and the Transfiguration room. How dare he? Who did Malfoy think he was?

Ginny had just been leaving the Potions class when she had smacked right into Draco Malfoy. She had been in a bit of a state already. That had been happening a lot since Fred had been killed, so she wasn't really paying attention to anything.

When Ginny had smashed into him he had stopped and grabbed her wrist. He was about to say something rude no doubt, but he stopped. Ginny saw him looking at her arm from her wrist to elbow. But no, that was none of his business! Ginny wrenched her arm away and ran up the nearest stair case.

* * *

Draco walked alone towards his next class: Potions. He was almost to the door when a short girl with a long mass of red curls ran straight into him. He was about to curse her when he saw the little white marks all up her arm. She suddenly realized what he was looking at and yanked away from him.

During class Draco wondered to himself about the marks on the young Weasley. They looked exactly the same as the scars that Draco had all over him. But her? A Weasley? There was no way; maybe she had some strange disease. There were so many people living in that house that it must pick things like that up all the time.They couldn't be scars. What reason would she have to hurt herself?

* * *

He can't know. Maybe he wasn't staring at her scars, just looking at her arm...or something. Even if he did see the scars he wouldn't realize just what they were. How would he know what the scars of a cutter looked like?

Ginny sat in the Transfiguration room trying to turn a rat into a lamp. She was failing horribly at her attempts. She was too busy worrying about whether or not Malfoy had seen the tiny white scars all over her arm. But, even if he did see them, and did know what they were, what would he do about it? It's not like he would go and tell anyone. Would he? He could blackmail her in the future; she would always have to watch her step around him, because he knew.

Finally the class was over and Ginny was about to go for lunch. Her friends were calling for her to follow them to the Great Hall but suddenly Ginny wasn't the slightest bit hungry. She waved her friends away and walked up to her dormitory in the Gryffindor Tower. Once she got there she made sure that all of the beds were empty and that there was no one else in the room with her. After she was absolutely sure she went to her bed and opened up the bottom drawer of her bed-side table. She reached into the very back of her drawer and drew out her knife.

She had bought the knife at the end of the summer in a Muggle knife shop. The handle of it was made of a dark wood; a deep chestnut. It had small silver roses printed on the handle. The blade was about 4 ½ inches long and was a shining silver. The blade had one long, black rose printed on it.

Ginny gripped the handle of her knife and made a small cut in her arm, around the inside of her elbow. She felt the familiar stinging pain but she did not flinch, she liked the pain, it calmed her nerves. She watched the dark red blood start to flow out of her fresh, new cut. The blood started to flow down her arm making a beautiful, red river.

Ginny thought that the sight of blood was one of the most beautiful things on the earth. When she had been little all of her girlfriends had felt sick at the site of blood. But not Ginny. Ginny thought that blood was an amazing substance. Other children thought her weird when she fell down and cut her knee on the ground and didn't bother to wash the blood off of her leg because she liked the way it looked.

But then, in the past summer, Ginny started cutting herself, mostly her arms, on purpose. It helped to get rid of all thoughts. When you're cutting yourself you don't think of anything else, just the pain. Some people thought it was disgusting, but Ginny thought that it was wonderful.

She wiped the blood off of her arm and put a spell on it to make it stop bleeding. She wiped her knife off and placed it back into the drawer. She grabbed a sweatshirt from beside her and left the room to go for lunch.

She sat down at the table next to her brother and his friends. She started to help herself to some of the food in front of her.

"Where did you go Ginny? You're late for lunch." Ron asked.

"I went up to my dorm, I wasn't really feeling well, but I figured I should come and get something to eat now," Ginny lied.

"Oh, are you sick Gin?" Hermione asked.

"No, I'm feeling much better now," Ginny told her friend.

* * *

Draco watched the young red-haired Gryffindor from the Slytherin table. He knew now that she did cut herself. He just didn't know why. He could see sadness in her eyes, and the scars on her arm were the same ones that he had on his own. What could have happened to this girl, who supposedly had the perfect life, that would make her want to hurt herself?

Draco used to cut himself nearly every night. He had stopped doing it nearly two months ago. His father was always pressuring him about becoming a Death Eater, but Draco really had no desire to follow a master who looked like a dead, rotten snake. He had become depressed earlier in life, for pretty much obvious reasons, and had begun to cut himself.

But in the last couple of months he had begun to spend some time with his mother and he found that she wasn't actually the stuck-up bitch that she was thought to be. She only acted like that when she was around her husband. Draco had never noticed what she was really like because he had never spent any time with her before. Draco had befriended his mother and stopped cutting himself. No one, not even his mother knew of his old addiction.

He sat and watched Ginny Weasley as she communicated with her friends. She just didn't seem all that lively. He had never really realized before, or maybe it was recent. Draco then made a pact to himself to find out what was really going on with Ginny Weasley.

* * *

AN: Well, I know that was short, but I only had half an hour and I wanted to get this up as soon as possible.

Ginny's knife, this knife is based on this: http:// www . geocities . com / scarsoftheblackrose / knifepic1 . jpg (take out the spaces)

Sort of, I personally think that that knife is absolutely gorgeous, and Ginny's knife is somewhat similar.

Please, let me know what you think of this so far, if you like where it seems to be going and such. There will probably be more of this story up soon. I hope.


	3. Chapter 2

AN: I put a link to a picture of a knife similar to Ginny's in the last chapter, but it didn't work, I'm going to try again now

If that didn't work please go to google and click images then look up 'black rose knife' it's the first picture.

Yeah, I have read Silver Scars by Opaque. I actually forgot all about having read that. I hope my story is not too much like hers (his?) I can't really remember much about that story. It will probably become different; don't have much planned for this story yet. Well, I have a little plan.

Chapter 2

Ginny was so glad that it was finally the weekend. She could just sit around and do nothing if she wanted. She could go to Hogsmeade tomorrow and have a good time. She would avoid the people who would ask questions and say things like:

"How are you, are you really alright?"

"It must be horrible to lose a sibling."

"I know you family's really close, this must be so hard for you."

"I know how you feel."

Didn't those people realize that they were just bringing pain back to her by asking questions and giving their 'sympathy'? Nobody could really understand what it was like for her, not even her family.

Fred had known about Ginny's cutting herself. It had all started in her second year. After her mishap in the Chamber of Secrets in her first year Ginny had become very depressed. Fred had helped her out of her depression. But when she entered her third year Fred became interested in other things, like girls and quidditch, and he rather forgot about his little sister. Ginny became depressed again and by her fourth year she was cutting. Fred caught her cutting one night in the summer and stole her knife, thus stopping the cutting for a little while. But soon Ginny was finding other things with which she could hurt herself with. Finally in her fifth year she stopped cutting by herself.

But then, Fred had been murdered and Ginny didn't know what to do with herself and had started cutting again. She had bought herself a blade and had been cutting ever since.

* * *

Draco didn't know what to do. His Grandmother, and his Mother, had been the only good things in his life so far. But now his Grandmother was dead. She had always been against Voldemort and she was a good person. Which was why she was killed by a Death Eater the night before last.

Draco had always been close to his Grandmother. His Father had forbidden him to see her or spend time with her. But that never really stopped her. She used to send him things all the time. Sometimes she would meet Draco at Hogsmeade while he was there from school. He was supposed to meet her at Hogsmeade tomorrow.

Draco walked to his dorm, he had been in the Great Hall and had received a letter from his mother. The halls were pretty much empty because everyone was eating lunch. The dorm was also empty when Draco got there but he could never be too sure. Draco opened his trunk and reached for the bottom. He pulled out a box and in the box was his knife. He grabbed the knife from the box and headed up to the Astronomy Tower.

* * *

Ginny was sitting in the Gryffindor Common Room with a few friends. One of her friends was reading a teen Muggle magazine. Ginny was glancing at it over her shoulder.

"Ew!" Her friend Mally said.

"What?" Ginny asked.

"They're talking about self mutilation in my magazine!"

"What? So." Ginny said.

"That's disgusting, why would anyone want to cut themselves?"

"I dunno, I guess the people who do it have their reasons," Ginny said.

"Cutting your body is not going to help with anything," Mally said.

"Whatever, I have to go," Ginny ran up to her dorm.

She reached into her drawer and grabbed her knife. She rested the knife in the sleeve of her jumper and ran out the door. She walked through the Common Room and out the portrait hole. She started to run up towards the Astronomy Tower. There was never anyone up there.

* * *

Draco walked into the tower, as usual it was empty. He sat down under the farrest window from the door. He brought his knife to his arm. He put the knife into his arm rather deep and dragged it down about 3 inches. He pulled his knife away and looked at it. The handle of his knife was mahogany. The handle had a silver strip on it and on that strip there were a bunch of ivy leaves. Printed on the blade, there were more ivy leaves and a couple of black flowers that resembled roses.

He brought the knife to his already bloody arm. He was about to cut a little closer to his hand, closer to his wrist when, suddenly, a girl came storming into the room. It was Ginny Weasley. She threw herself down on the floor, obviously not realizing he was there. But suddenly her head turned in his direction and she had a very surprised look on her face.

"Malfoy," was all she said.

"Yes."

"You're cutting yourself," she stated.

"Obviously," he said, boredly.

"Why?"

"Now, really Weasley, I don't think that's any of your business. How would you feel if I asked you why you cut yourself?"

"Well I'd probably.Wait! You know that I cut? I didn't think you saw."

"I saw alright, and if I didn't cut myself I probably wouldn't have realized what the marks on your arm even were when I saw them." Draco told her.

"You won't tell anyone will you?"

"Who would I bloody tell Weasley?"

"I dunno, maybe one of your friends."

"Yes, because I have so many friends," he drawled.

"You have friends, you're popular."

"Oh, yeah, and they're real friends too," Draco said sarcastically.

"Well."

"Whatever Weasley, I'm not in the mood. Get out so I can finish this."

"No, I came her to do the same thing as you, so I'm staying," Ginny said stubbornly.

Ginny plonked herself back down on the floor and lifted her blade to her arm. She dragged the blade down her arm and drew blood. But somehow it wasn't the same when someone else is in the room. She went on anyway; trying to be mad at her friend for talking about cutting like it was only for the lowest life-forms or something.

"Damnit Malfoy, you wrecked my mood," Ginny swore at him

"Well Weasley, I was here first, after all."

Malfoy was making her so mad that she really wanted to cut herself now. She thought of all of the times that he had picked on her and teased her. Then she thought of the things that his father had done. It had been Lucius Malfoy that had slipped her the diary that nearly killed her. It had been Lucius Malfoy that had murdered her older brother. She stabbed the knife into her arm and gasped at the pain. She had never really stabbed herself like that before. She saw Malfoy looking at her.

"God Weasley, what are you doing? Trying to kill yourself?"

"Maybe."

"Well don't," Draco walked over and held her arm, he put a charm on her arm to stop the bleeding and pain, but she would still have a scar from that. "I haven't heard your story yet."

* * *

Ron walked around the Common Room, where was his sister? Apparently she had stormed out of the Tower earlier in the day and hadn't been seen since. She didn't really have any reason to be mad at him or any of her friends. They had just been reading a magazine in the Common Room. Maybe she was thinking about Fred. Suddenly Ron had an idea of how to find her.

"Harry, can I borrow your map?"

* * *

AN: Well, what do you guys think so far? I know it's not great, but a girl can try right? I'm only 13, give me time.

I've read a lot of fanfiction over the last 3-4 years. So mine might resemble some others that I've read. I never even really thought about this before. I hope that my stuff is original and I will try to keep it just that.

Thanks to

Kneh13 of course and totowizofoz there was one more review (it says I have three) but its not showing up yet, so thank you to the invisible reviewer.


	4. Chapter 3

AN: Hey guys, thanks for all of the reviews, that's awesome. So yeah, my links wont work and Im to lazy to save this as an HTML file, so yeah. The reason I use 'ooooo' to when switching to a new character is because every time I use '' it decides not to show up, but.we shall see.

Chapter 3

Ginny stared at Draco, "What do you mean my story?"

"Well, why do you cut?"

"Why the hell should I tell you, is that any of your business?"

"Everything is my business. I'm making this my business," he said stubbornly.

"If you really wanna hear it then you'll have to walk with me," Ginny said.

"Why can't we stay here in this nice, cosy, tower?" Draco said sarcastically.

"Because, what if someone comes looking for us? Wouldn't wanna be found together eh? But, when walking, we can split easily," Ginny explained.

"Fine whatever," Draco slipped his knife back into its case and put it into his pocket, Ginny did the same.

Ginny rolled her sleeve down over her fresh cuts, they were no longer bleeding and she had no pain, she was not happy about that. Draco covered up his arm with his sleeve, but it was still bleeding. They walked together out of the astronomy tower.

Harry and Ron looked at the map, "What is she doing with Malfoy?" Ron asked.

"I'm not sure, maybe they aren't walking together, the map isn't always proportioned, he could be 10 feet behind her," Harry said, knowing it was not true.

"Yeah, I hope so, come on though, lets get to where Ginny is," Ron said.

* * *

"So, you started in your fourth year?"

"Yeah, but then I stopped in my fifth," Ginny finished explaining.

"Then, why did you start again?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

"Obviously not," Draco snarled.

"My brother died in the summer Malfoy, you're father killed him."

At that moment they heard footsteps and Draco immediately turned and started walking in the other direction.

"Ginny! What are you doing wandering around in the halls with Malfoy?" Ron asked.

"Oh, he was teasing me, so I told him off," Ginny lied.

"Teasing you? What did you say to him?"

"I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you," Ginny said.

"Fine, whatever, come on, lets go back to the Common Room," Ron answered briskly.

* * *

Draco walked away from where he and Weasley had been talking. He was not sure why he wanted to know what was going on with her. It was not because he actually cared. He pretty much knew everything about everyone in the school, except her. That must be why.

Draco had forgotten that his father had killed Fred Weasley over the summer. For once in his life, Draco actually felt bad.

* * *

The next day Ginny went with Ron, Hermione and Harry to Hogsmeade. She spent half of the day with them. However, by the time they had finished lunch Ginny needed to get away and spend some time by herself.

"Well, you guys, I need to go buy a bra. So I'm gonna leave you here now and I'll see you back at Hogwarts later," Ginny laughed at the look on her brother and Harry's faces.

She waved and then turned in the other direction and started walking towards the park that was in the centre of the town. She sat down on a bench and was just enjoying the quiet when she was interrupted by footsteps crunching on the stony ground.

"Weasley, I do believe we were interrupted yesterday no?"

"Malfoy, what do you want, really?"

"Nothing, just want to hear about your truly fascinating life."

"Right," Ginny said.

"Well, I don't need a reason. I know your little secret and if you don't talk to me then I will tell the dream team all about it, sound good?"

"Walk with me," Ginny said with a fake smile.

They left the park area and walked down towards a more secluded area of the town. Ginny was about to suggest going into a small pub, since they were standing outside it, but Draco walked right past the place. He seemed to know where he was going so Ginny just followed along beside him.

"So, Weasley, tell me about your life," Malfoy said.

"You already know everything, this is blackmail you know."

"Yes, yes, I know."

"So, what else do you want to know?"

"I'm not exactly sure," Draco said, wishing he could think of something better to say.

"Well then, why don't you tell me about why you cut?"

"That is absolutely none of your business, besides isn't it obvious?"

"Just because your family isn't.great, doesn't mean that you need to hurt yourself," Ginny said.

"You wouldn't understand, your family is perfect. I bet your father has never hit you before."

"No, he hasn't," Ginny told him.

"Good, nobody should be abused by anyone," Draco said bitterly.

"Seriously though, why are you suddenly so interested in my life all of a sudden?"

"I don't know," Draco said seriously. "There's just something about you that I can't understand, and I want to know what it is."

"Well, I can't help you if you don't know what you're looking for."

* * *

The next week people started to notice that Draco Malfoy wasn't snapping at people anymore. He often walked around looking somewhat sad and distant, always deep in thought. What nobody knew was that he was deep in thought about Ginny Weasley. He was trying to figure out why he was so drawn to her. Like, sure, she was pretty enough, he always had liked curly hair. Nevertheless, it wasn't physical attraction, he didn't know if it was attraction at all. He did not know what was going on in his brain.

Draco realized that he enjoyed spending time with her. Even though almost every time they talked they just argued, he still liked talking to her. Just the way she said some words, he liked her voice. Just her presence was somehow comforting. He knew that they could never really be friends. Draco did not know how to make friends. He did not know how to be a friend. That and his father would kill him, if her family didn't first.

Draco had barely cut himself in the past week. He realized that cutting himself really did him no good. All it did was cause him extra pain. It took his thoughts away from bad things, but only for a moment. And there are other things that can do that as well. Like thinking about Ginny. When Draco thought about Ginny he wasn't thinking about his grandmother being dead, or his father beating his mother. He was thinking about something that comforted him. Now, why thinking of Ginny comforted him he wasn't quite sure.

He had spent some time watching her the last few days. He had memorized the way she moved and the way she looked. He had noticed that she started biting her fingernails when she was getting mad. He noticed that she never really bothered to play with or fiddle with her hair like other girls did. He noticed that she only had two different pairs of robes. She never wore any jewelry, she probably didn't have any. He noticed a lot of things about her.

He had a habit of checking at meals to see if she was there. It seemed that she never ate. She never came to breakfast. During a meal, if she didn't show up, he would constantly look over to see if she was at the Gryffindor table yet. Nobody really noticed, or maybe no one cared. Except Granger. One night, at supper, he looked over and was met with a penetrating glare from Hermione Granger. He looked down at his plate and didn't look back over at that table again during that meal.

He had also been sort of following her around. He knew when all of her classes were and who all of the people she hung around with. Granger seemed to be around her all of the time. But she never really noticed that he was following them.

"Ginny, whats up with you and Malfoy?" Hermione asked her one night.

"Nothing, what do you mean?"

"Well, no reason, its just, he's always staring over at our table during meals. I swear he's been following you around today," Hermione told Ginny.

"I dunno, maybe I'm his new obsession or something," Ginny said sarcastically.

"That's not really funny, Gin."

That night Ginny dreamt that there was someone in her room, sitting right next to her bed. When she woke up she could almost hear someone breathing.

* * *

Wow, I'm just popping these chapters out eh?

Reviews are awesome, thanks to: (going from most recent on down.)

Cinnamon Angel - thanks so much for reviewing my story! I love your writing. Thank you also for the good advice

Ckat44 - Do you think its too gruesome to be PG - 13? Let me know if I should change the rating. Thanks for the idea for my story, I'll look into that

Kinesha - thanks so much, there will be some romance, but not for a little while yet

redpolish - that would be the right link, I don't know why I can't get it to show up

kneh13 - thanks for always reviewing my stuff, don't worry Ron isn't gonna find out.yet

not logged on - thanks, I think that some of my feelings do come out in my writing, I'm just kind of like that, I always put a bit of myself into my work.

Laura Melissa - thankyou for your review, I think your English is very good and I don't think that your review was stupid

I don't want anyone to start cutting after reading my work, that is the last thing that I want. My story is coming from past experience, I used to cut very often, just to get away from my thoughts, but I haven't cut since the end of December. Cutting really doesn't help you out much. Like Draco said (quoting my own stuff here.) cutting does take your mind off of things, but there are other things that can do that too, like.reading fanfiction, heh heh. I'm sure people cut for other reasons besides that, but it still isn't really an excuse, so, please, don't start, its hard to stop.


	5. Chapter 4

AN: I probably shouldn't be writing this right now because I still have homework to do for tomorrow, but I must say, I would much rather be writing this that doing my homework. Thanks for all of the awesome reviews you guys. Thank you to some of you for sharing a bit about your pasts as well. I'm going to add a little thing at the beginning of each chapter so her goes.

I do not want anyone to start cutting after reading my work, that is the last thing that I want. My story is coming from past experience, I used to cut very often, just to get away from my thoughts, that and I like blood, but I haven't cut since the end of December. Cutting really does not help you out much. As Draco said (quoting my own stuff here.) cutting does take your mind off of things, but there are other things that can do that too, like.reading fanfiction, heh heh. I am sure people cut for other reasons besides that, but it still is not really an excuse, so, please, do not start, its hard to stop.

Disclaimer: Yes, really, I do own Harry Potter, that is why, you see, I am sitting around writing fanfiction about my own books.Yeah, right, I don't own it, just borrowing, so don't sue me, sound good?

CHAPTER 4

The next day Ginny woke up having slept surprisingly well despite her weird dreams. Although it had seemed as though there were someone there she somehow knew that the presence was not a harmful one. She was not sure how she knew this just from a silly dream, but that's what she was feeling.

Once Ginny had gotten down for breakfast, she remembered that she never came down for breakfast. Maybe God had some special reason for her to be at breakfast today, Suddenly Dumbledore stood up to make an announcement:

"Good morning students! I would like to inform you that in one month's time, on October 31st, we will be having a dance. This dance will be for 4th years and up, younger students must be invited by older students as dates.

"The dance will be a costume dance. Anyone who shows up at the dance without a costume should beware. There will be a spell placed on the door to the Hall. You may find yourself dressed in a costume that you won't like much."

All that week everyone was talking on and on about the dance. Ginny had already decided that she was not going to be attending. Not that anyone would ask her anyway. Then, one day in the hall, Ginny had overheard a couple of Gryffindor boys discussing the dance.

'Who should I take to the dance?" The blonde guy asked his friend.

"Isn't it a bit early yet?"

"I figure I should ask soon before all of the girls get dates."

"Why don't you ask that Weasley girl, she's pretty enough," his friend said, obviously not knowing she was there.

"Are you kidding me? Ginny Weasley is the weirdest girl in this school, and that's saying something. She has no friends, Hermione and Harry only hang around with her because she's Ron's little sister and they feel sorry for her."

"Ok, ok! I was just joking anyway, jeez," and with that the two boys continued down the hall.

Ginny walked in the opposite direction wondering to herself. Did everyone think that about her? That she was just weird and had no friends? Did Harry and Hermione really only tolerate her because she was Ron's sister? Ginny was really pissed off now because she knew that those boys were probably right. She already had her knife on her so she started up in the direction of the Astronomy Tower.

Ginny sat down inside the tower, as she had done many times before, and rolled up her sleeve. She brought the knife down onto her skin and slowly dragged the knife along her arm. She watched the blood start to build up and she put her finger in it. She smeared the blood in a line down her arm. She did three more cuts diagonally underneath the first one and then she put her knife down and began to cry.

Draco heard a couple of younger Gryffindor boys mention Ginny's name. He stopped to listen for a second. The boys didn't notice because they were around the corner from him. The boys seemed to be talking about the dance. But then Draco heard one of them say that Ginny was really strange and that he would never go to the dance with Ginny. Suddenly the boys turned the corner, they were laughing. Draco could not stand it; he would not let them turn her into a joke. Draco threw himself at the blonde guy.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing Malfoy?" The boy's friend shouted at him.

Draco didn't answer, he was too busy. He struggled with the guy for a minute but then, since he was obviously stronger, he wrestled him to the floor. He started to punch the guy in the face, he was suddenly very angry. He didn't even know who the boy he was beating up was; he just knew that he and his little friend had said mean things about Ginny. The guy's friend tried to pull Draco off of him but did not succeed. But then Harry and Ron turned the corner and saw what was going on.

"Malfoy what the hell are you doing?" Harry shouted to him.

"You could never take Ginny to the dance! You don't even deserve to talk about her! Fuck you!" Draco was shouting at the abused Gryffindor.

"Malfoy what does this have to do with my sister?" Ron said.

Harry and Ron and the other Gryffindor, whose name was Mike, helped pull Draco off of the younger student. The blonde Gryffindor, whose name was Tim, stood up shakily and wiped his bloody nose.

"What the hell were you doing Malfoy?" Harry asked again.

Draco had to stop to catch his breath, but after he had he said, "These Gryffindor runts were talking bad about your sister Weasley."

"What did they say about Ginny?" Ron glared.

"They said that she was the strangest girl in school and that she had no friends and that you guys only hung around with her because you felt sorry for her," Malfoy told them, he figured there was really no point in lying to an angry Weasley.

Ron then threw himself ceremoniously at Tim.

* * *

Ginny sat in the tower for the rest of the day. She had no clue what had happened between her brother, Malfoy and the other Gryffindors. The tower was completely silent, so Ginny heard the footsteps coming up the stairs long before they reached the door. Ginny quickly brought her sleeve back down and magically cleaned her knife. She slipped her knife into her book bag, pulled out a book, and pretended to be reading it. She heard the huge tower door open and saw Draco Malfoy walk in. 

"What do you want?" Ginny asked without looking up from her book.

"Why are you up here?"

"I came up here to read," Ginny lied.

"You've been crying," Draco said sitting beside her.

"I have not."

"You have,"

"Why do you care anyway?" Ginny asked.

"I don't know," Draco told the truth.

"How can you not know?"

"I don't know why I care, but I care about you Ginny," Malfoy used her first name.

"Well, don't bother, no one cares about me."

"As much as I hate to inform you, your brother and Potter actually care about you," Draco told her.

"No, they only hang around me because they feel sorry for me," Draco realized that Ginny must have heard about what the Gryffindors said about her earlier.

"They helped me beat up a couple of students from their own house. I think they actually care," Draco said quietly.

"They beat up Mike and Tim?"

"We did, and then Potter used a nice memory charm on them, so they shouldn't remember a thing."

Ginny suddenly became distracted and reached into her bag for her knife. She could cut herself in front of Malfoy because he already knew anyway. However, just as she was about to bring the knife down onto her arm she felt his hand on her other arm.

"Don't," he whispered.

"Don't what?"

"Don't hurt yourself anymore," Draco said.

"I need to."

"No, no you don't," Draco said.

"Stop being such a hypocrite Malfoy," Ginny snapped.

"I'm not being a hypocrite, I decided to stop cutting myself over a week ago," Draco informed her.

"Well, good for you, that doesn't mean that I have to quit as well," Ginny told him.

"I don't want you to be hurt Ginny," Draco said.

Ginny set her knife down on the floor, "You know what Malfoy? I don't think you're as bad and awful and evil as everyone thinks that you are."

"No, I am. You just change me somehow. I'm a different person when I'm around you. It's as if you've put a spell on me. You haven't, have you?"

"No offense Malfoy, but you're probably the last person that I would put that kind of spell on," Ginny told him.

"Yeah, I figured," Draco told her.

"So if you're a changed man, then what would you like me to do for you?"

"I'm not a 'changed man', only when I'm around you."

"You seem pretty different to me. Beating up a bunch of Gryffindors just because they made fun of me."

"Well, I like beating up Gryffindors, I'll jump at pretty much any chance I get," Draco said. Ginny was about to smack him when she realized that he was joking, so she smacked him anyway for being sarcastic.

"So anyway, why did you come up here in the first place?"

'Well, I sort of wanted to ask you something."

"What did you want to ask me?"

"I wanted to ask you to the dance. Although I know you'll say no, because you hate me and all. I'm supposed to hate you too, but I just can't."

Ginny thought for a moment. She actually did like hanging around Malfoy. He was nice to her, for some reason. He helped her to take her thoughts off things. Moreover, it would be interesting to see her brother and Harry's reaction when they found out. She might as well give him a chance.

"I will go to the dance with you Malfoy."

* * *

AN: Well, there's the end of chapter 4. I hope you guys are enjoying this. I know that Draco seems a bit out of character, but I don't really care.

Big thanks to those of you who reviewed but I don't have time to thank you all individually now, maybe next chapter.

I'm not sure, but I might not add chapters as fast as I have in the past week. The people in my household don't know that I write fanfiction and I would like to keep it that way. I generally only write when there is no one else home, which does happen fairly often. So you guys can probably expect about a chapter a week, maybe two.


	6. Chapter 5

AN: Well, I am writing this on the same day as I posted chapter #4, so there are no new reviews from the last chapter yet.

CHAPTER 5

Ginny was reading in the Common Room in front of the fireplace. Well, she wasn't really reading, she was thinking about Draco. Had she made the right choice going to the dance with him? She had been planning to not go at all, now she had to get a costume and such. The opening of the portrait hole interrupted her thoughts. It was Harry.

"Hey Ginny," he said, sitting down beside her.

"Hi Harry, is there anything I can do for you?" Ginny said putting her book down on the arm of her chair.

"No, nothing. I just came over to ask you something."

Now where had she heard that before? "What did you want to know?"

"I was wondering if you would go to the Halloween dance with me?"

"I would Harry, but I already have a date."

"Can I ask you are going with?"

"If you must know, I'm going with Draco Malfoy," Ginny told him.

"What? Why? Do you even know him?"

"We've chatted a bit in the last few weeks; I've found that he's not as horrible as I thought he was. When he asked me I thought I'd give him a chance," Ginny had never thought she would be sticking up for a Malfoy.

"Well, I guess only you know what's best for you," Harry said, angrily, walking up the stairs to his dorm.

Ginny hoped she knew what was best for her.

* * *

For the next few days Draco practically floated around the school. He was going to the dance with Ginny! He wasn't sure why he cared so much, after all, she was just a girl. Nevertheless, it was Ginny! He was taking her to the dance! He had never actually cared about a girl before. Ginny scared him because he cared about her. If any of the Slytherins had paid attention to him throughout those days, they might have actually seen him smiling.

He and Ginny had decided to keep their newfound friendship a secret until the dance. They thought it might be amusing to watch everyone's faces change as they walked into the Great Hall. They had been meeting in the Astronomy Tower every few nights for a while. Last night they had discussed costumes.

"Draco?" Ginny had asked him.

"Yeah?" They had been sitting in silence for a while, so Draco was slightly startled.

"What are we going to wear to the dance?"

"I've been thinking about that."

"And?"

"I'm completely stumped. I've thought of tons of different costumes, but none that I would dare be seen in."

"Well, I was thinking. How about if we go as two of the Professors from the school?"

Draco thought about it for a moment and then Ginny saw the first real smile that she had ever seen on him.

* * *

Ron was walking around on the same night, about the same time as Draco and Ginny were talking. He somehow made his way up to the Astronomy Tower. He wasn't really planning on going inside, but he was somehow drawn to the room. He quietly opened the door to the room and saw a very strange site. He didn't like it at all.

He saw his sister, sleeping, with her head against Malfoy's shoulder. He wasn't sure if Malfoy was sleeping or not so he closed the door. He was about to barge back into the tower screaming obscenities but he stopped himself. Ron had a better idea.

Around 2:00am, Ginny woke up in the tower. Every morning when Ginny woke up, she always lay around for a few minutes before opening her eyes. But this time it seemed different. She wasn't sleeping in her dorm bed. She was leaning on something soft. She was sitting on a hard, cold surface. She opened her eyes and saw that she was leaning on Draco's shoulder in the Astronomy Tower. She gently shook his shoulder.

"Draco, wake up. We fell asleep in the Tower," she whispered.

"What? What time is it?"

"I'm not sure, but I'm thinking that if we go anywhere now, we'll probably get caught."

"True," Draco said, waking up.

They were silent for a moment, but Draco noticed something. Ginny was sitting cross-legged on the floor. She had her hands in her lap and she was playing with her fingers. She was kind of tapping them together and biting her nails. She looked up at him, not really realizing what she was doing.

"I haven't cut in two days," she stated.

"Good," Draco said.

"I think that I'm sort of addicted to cutting," Ginny said slowly.

"What do you mean?"

"Like, even if I'm not depressed I need to cut myself," Ginny tried to explain.

"So you're not depressed, but you really want to cut yourself right now?"

"Yeah, like I'm really fidgety and just altogether kind of absent- minded because I'm always thinking about cutting," Ginny told him.

"Well, it makes sense, sort of, although I never really had that problem myself," Draco said.

Draco fell silent for a few moments and Ginny wondered why. She turned to look at him and noticed that he had fallen asleep. Ginny tried to sleep again, but found herself very restless. She reached into her small purse and pulled out her knife, she now carried it with her everywhere.

She stared at the knife for a few moments, did she really want to do this? She hadn't cut in a few days and was happy with herself. But she needed to do it, it was like a fucking drug, she thought. She rested the dull side of the blade on her arm. She loved the feeling of the metal on her flesh. She quickly grabbed the handle of the knife and flipped it over.

She put the knife onto her arm and felt the familiar stinging pain and her nerves were satisfied. She began to drag the blood knife along her arm in a new, deep cut. She pulled the knife away and watched the blood flow out of the gash.

She watched the blood pouring out of the cut on her arm for a few moments before bringing the blade back down onto her arm. She was barely half way through her next cut when she realized that Draco was watching her cut.

She looked at him, caught in the act. He was the only person that had ever seen her cut before besides Fred. For once she could actually see something in his silver eyes: sadness.

* * *

Ginny woke up in the tower the next morning, once again with her head rested on Draco's shoulder. She shook him awake and told him that they needed to go to class.

"I'll walk you to the Gryffindor Tower"

"Someone might see you."

"I don't care."

And that was that. Ginny grabbed her knife off the floor from  
where she had left it last night and they left the tower together.  
They walked in silence down the hall. Ginny reached over and grabbed  
Draco's hand. She half expected him to pull away and glare at her.  
But that was the old Draco. She wasn't used to the way that he acted  
around her. Somehow they managed to get to the tower without being  
seen. It must have been earlier than they thought it had been.

Ginny turned to say goodbye to Draco but as she did she noticed  
him looking at her weird.

"What?" Ginny asked.

Draco answered her by leaning down and brushing his lips softly  
against hers.

TBC

AN: Well, I found out that I could never tell anyone, especially at school, that I have ever cut myself before. There is a guy in my class at school that cuts himself. I knew that he cut himself like way back when; I saw cuts on his arm and stuff. And a bunch of other kids in my class found out and started like freaking out and bothering him about it. They all went and told my homeroom teacher about his self-mutilation. Then the teacher called him in a talked to him for a few minutes. I am friends with one of his friends so I found out what the teacher had said to him. He made him lift up his sleeve, but he didn't lift it high enough for the teacher to actually see anything. So now my teacher thinks that all of the kids that told him were mistaken or something. Then a bunch of my friends were saying 'oh, we should tell him again eh?' 'He's hurting himself and the teacher should know because then he can help him.' I'm just like.uh 'It really isn't your business if he cuts himself or not, he's been doing it for a while and as far as I know he isn't planning on killing himself," Now, if he kills himself I'm going to feel very guilty. But yeah, none of you guys really needed to know that, I just thought that I would tell you anyway because I am rather bored right now. So yeah, no one except my readers here will ever know about my old habit.

Now about Ginny's 'addiction'. I don't know about all of you guys who cut, but since I've quit, last month, I've really been wanting to cut myself. Not because I'm depressed right now or anything, just because I like doing it. Yeah I know I'm a freak. And like, I do what Ginny does, I play with my hands and am very restless. I hope I can fight it and not cut again, because although I somehow like cutting, I'd really rather not.

Guys, kindly do me a favour eh? Just a little one, it'll take 20 seconds, maybe 30, out of your busy lives, I know. But please just click the little review button. You can just write like 1 word, or 1000 if you like, but please, it really makes my day to hear from you guys.


	7. Chapter 6

AN: Hey guys, wow, I got many reviews on my last chapter. I think I am going to do the reviewer response thing here since I always forget at the end.

Kneh13 - thanks so much for your review in chapter 4. I am glad you do not care how often I update my stuff. And in Chapter 5 - Thanks, and I agree that Ginny is replacing her cutting with Draco, but not completely yet.

Clat44 - is it clat? Hmm, says clat I thought it was ckat. Anyway, thankyou for the review of chapter 4, I'm glad you like my version of Draco. You also reviewed chapter 5 - I'm glad that you friend quit. And those are the exact teachers I had in mind. (

Nichole Malfoy - Thankyou for reviewing chapter 4, I'm glad you don't mind the Out-of-Character-ness.

Kinesha - I did get all of my homework done. I hope you manage to get all of yours done and that you managed to get caught up in school. Glad you liked chapter 5 as well.

Kiayla Johnson - I really hope that no one makes me tell my parents about my cutting, I would like die. But no one, save the people reading this, know about my cutting so that shouldn't be happening anytime soon.

Chocoliciouz - thankyou, you guys really do make my day. Its awesome to come on here and see new reviews.

sever13 - laziness truly does prevail. I'll try to get my next update out soon. I'm glad that you understand.

sandwichbitch - I'm glad you like my writing. And you're welcome for reading it. I actually plan on finishing this one.

CassieOwls - Thanks, I'm glad that my story can be the first. I'm always sleeping so I understand what you're saying.

Cinnamon Angel - Its ok that you haven't been able to review. You're probably going to be kind of disappointed in me too, I started cutting again earlier this week. But, more about that later. I'm glad that you don't mind the whole dance thing. And yeah, I have noticed that a lot of people use a dance in their stories. But my story is not going to turn fluffy and pink.I would throw up. I'm glad that I'm not a freak. I think I might go and read one of your poems sometime. I'm interested in reading some of your other stuff. I'm glad that you didn't cut yourself, I wish I could stop. But then, on the other hand, I don't really want to quit. I just know that I SHOULD quit, but I really don't want to. Ron may do something stupid, you'll just have to wait and see. I have a little plan for him that you may or may not like.

Rose Petal - Thanks. I'm glad that you quit cutting so long ago. Thankyou for wishing me luck in my quitting, I think I'm going to need more than luck though.

AN: So yeah, that wasn't too long was it? This chapter took longer to get out than my chapter usually do, I know, but I have definitely not had the greatest week in my history. Yes, I have started cutting again. I am not going to get into it now; I want to write this chapter, I may talk about it later.

In this chapter you might get something from Draco's POV. I hate to switch around a lot but I feel the need to get into his head. Just so you're warned, I'm pretty sure that his head is not a happy place.

Disclaimer - yes.really, I do own Harry Potter. Haven't you heard? There was this auction thing and I bought Harry Potter, so yes, now I am writing fanfiction, about the books.that I own. Yes.really

Chapter 6

RON

Ron was wondering around early in the morning. He hadn't been able to sleep after he had seen Ginny sitting in the Astronomy Tower with Malfoy. He had been wandering around the school for hours just plotting about what he was going to do to Malfoy. He was planning to get his revenge at the Halloween Dance. He needed to follow Malfoy around a bit though first. He would need to study him so he would know how to hurt him best.

He was almost back to the Gryffindor Tower when he heard a familiar voice. It was Ginny. Ron stuck his head around the corner and watched them for a minute. He heard Ginny say something and then suddenly they were kissing.

Ron was going to get his revenge soon.

* * *

DRACO'S POV

Why the hell did I kiss her? I cannot be falling for a Weasley. It is not supposed to happen this way. My father is going to murder me alive when he finds out. Then he will murder Ginny. Of course, he will find out too. My Father finds out everything. He will know as soon as we show up at the dance because I am sure that he has little messengers in this school just waiting to report news to him. When he does find out he will beat me as he has never done before, if he doesn't kill me. My father has been an abusive father ever since I can remember; I am just so used to it now.

I have not cut myself in over a week, but I need to now. I am so confused right now about what to do with Ginny. I just need to stop thinking about it. I have just slipped into the dorm, everyone here is still sleeping. I walked silently, as always, over to my bed. I reached across its neatly made surface to my bedside table. I opened the drawer as quietly as possible and I grabbed my knife. I quickly ran out of the room and ran towards one of my favourite places in the castle.

There was a staircase hidden away in the back of the castle. I had been going to that staircase for many years to cut. I would always just sit on the stairs and let the blood fall. When I finally reached this place I looked down at the steps. Sure enough, there were many dry-blood stains all down it. I sat down on the second step from the top and pulled up my sleeve.

* * *

RON

Ron was lost. It was the first time in the last two years that Ron had been lost in the school. He figured that now that he was in his 7th year he would know his way around a bit better. He had wandered off after seeing his sister kissing that bloody Malfoy. He had been aimlessly walking around whispering and cursing to himself.

Suddenly he came to a corner; once again, he peaked around the corner to see if anyone was there. At first, Ron did not see anyone; all he saw was a lonesome staircase. Then he noticed a figure slumped over on the stairs. It was Draco Malfoy. More importantly, it was Draco Malfoy cutting himself.

Ron had never been a big fan of blood although it didn't really bother him. However, when he saw Malfoy sitting on those stairs with a knife pressing into his arm he started to feel woozy. Both of Malfoy's arms were dripping blood. Malfoy was currently carving something into his right arm. It appeared to be a word but he could not make out what it said. Suddenly Ron knew exactly what he was going to do to Draco Malfoy.

* * *

GINNY

Ginny wandered into her dorm in a daze. Draco had kissed her. And she'd liked it. Draco Malfoy would have been the last person that Ginny would have thought that she would be interested in, but somehow now it just all seemed perfectly natural to her.

Suddenly Ginny began to feel kind of dizzy. She felt a sharp pain in her arm and rolled up her sleeve. Her cuts from earlier that morning had been bleeding a lot she noticed. Her arm was caked in blood.So much blood. Ginny just began to realize just how much she had cut herself. She rolled up her other arm and saw fresh cuts on that arm too. She lifted the bottom of her robe and saw cuts on her legs as well. She began to wonder how much blood she had lost. Ginny wandered up to her dorm and collapsed onto her bed.

* * *

DRACO

Draco watched as the blood trickled out of the fresh, new cuts on his arm and rolled onto the cold, stone floor. He had carved three question marks into his arm. Draco had always liked that look up question marks. They looked like half a heart. But not exactly, because they had a small dot underneath them. Something so small as that dot could make a complete difference in what something looks like.

Draco had never actually cut words into his body. Just cuts. To cut those marks he just cut a curved line and stabbed the knife quickly into his arm underneath the curves. He set his knife down on the floor next to his foot. He rested his hands on his knees and hung his head. What kind of person was he? He had to harm himself to help take away all of his pain? It didn't make any sense. Yet, somehow, it made complete and total sense.

Draco sat on that staircase for hours. Just thinking and bleeding. By the time he left there was much more blood on the floor than there had been when he had gotten to the stairs in the first place.

Draco was not really happy with himself for cutting again. He had wanted to quit. He had quit for a while. But he couldn't manage to not do it. His life was just too hard to handle. He couldn't help carving into himself up occasionally. He had to do it to keep sane. If he didn't take his anger and sadness out on his body there was no telling what Draco could do.

The next day Draco woke up very sore. His arms were aching. And he liked it. Draco liked to be in pain again. He missed waking up and not feeling the sting of fresh cuts on his arms and legs. He raised the sleeve of the shirt that he had worn to bed. Eight clean cuts were on his arm. They were very deep and they hurt like hell, Draco loved them. He lifted his other sleeve and looked at the question marks in his right arm.

Draco heard someone stirring in the room. He turned and saw Blaise Zabini turned, staring at him. Draco rolled his sleeves down. Had Zabini seen his cuts? Blaise wore glasses and he hadn't had them on. How bad was his vision? Was it so bad that he wouldn't notice a bunch of long red gashes on Draco's arm?

* * *

Ginny woke up the next morning with a severe headache. Her arms were still hurting, but not as bad as they had been before. They were just stinging now. She really didn't feel like getting up for breakfast or going to class so she rolled over and went to back to sleep.

Ginny didn't even notice her older brother walk into the room and start rummaging through her trunk. Ron was as silent as he could be. He was looking for clues about Draco Malfoy. Ron was looking around Ginny's bed when he came across her purse. Ron opened up the purse and found a large knife. The knife must be Draco's he thought. Ginny must have taken it in an attempt to make him quit cutting. Ron knew that Ginny was soft and would eventually give him back the knife so he put the knife into his pocket and slipped out of the silent dorm.

* * *

Well guys, that's chapter.what is this? 6? Yeah, so anyway. This chapter seems really short to me, but I don't really care all that much. I'm just glad that its done. The next chapter should be the dance/ball, which means that it should be fairly long, that should help to make up for this chapter's shortness.

Also, just hit that happy, little, lonesome review button down there. What? You can't find it? Look down and to your left.you should see the nice little guy down there.


	8. Chapter 7

AN: Hey guys, hope you enjoyed the last chapter.

Shadowed Past - thankyou for reviewing chapter 5. I am glad that you know how I feel. I am glad I am not the only one who likes blood.

Cinnamon Angel - Ron may hurt someone. However, it will not be permanent. I am glad that you are not disappointed in me. I do not plan to quit with this story until it is done. I also have an idea for another story. I may not ever post the story if I do write it. Nevertheless, I have a plan just in case I ever feel like writing a second. I am glad that you have not cut again. I did read some of your poems over at fictionpress and I liked them, you are very good at writing poetry.

Reader1 - thankyou. I am glad that you are enjoying this fic. I am enjoying writing it. My updates come out fairly fast so you can expect more in the next two weeks.

LibranQueen103 - I am happy that you liked the last chapter. You can expect more of the story to be up soon.

sandwichbitch - I am very glad that you liked that chapter. Was it more depressed than usual? You must be good at picking things up. Things are not going all that great for me right now. I have started cutting again in the last two weeks. I did not think people would be able to notice my depression through my writing though.

Kneh13 - glad you are enjoying it. Ron needs to rethink his thoughts about many things, including Ginny and Draco. There should be more up soon.

Nallie - I am very sorry about your friend killing herself. Do not worry though, I am not suicidal. I think I will quit eventually, but not right now.

ckat44 - glad you liked the chapter. Yeah, the story is somewhat sad isn't it? I think I will have some fun writing the dance, I hope you enjoy reading it. I dunno about happiness though. I think that someone will be finding out about their cutting (besides Ron of course). I do not know about a teacher, but I think someone's dad shall be finding out in the near future.

AN: Well, this is chapter 7, I think, cannot really keep track. I have an idea for a new story. I am not sure if I want to post a second one just yet though. I had like four or five stories going at one point, before the music group section on this site was disposed of. So yeah, look for more of my work in the future.

* * *

CHAPTER 7

Ginny woke up around noon. She looked around the dorm to find that there was no one else inside it. She looked towards the clock on the wall. It was nearly time for lunch. Ginny pushed down her covers and stepped slowly out of her bed. She immediately put her hand to her forehead, she was still feeling dizzy.

She went into the bathroom and brushed her hair. She rolled up her sleeves and saw that her arms were still covered in blood. She washed her arms off. The soap and water stung at her cuts. Ginny pulled her hair into a ponytail and left the bathroom.

Ginny did not feel much like going down for lunch. She did not feel like doing much of anything actually. Well, she rather wanted to cut. She opened the bottom drawer of her night table and reached inside for her knife. It was not there! Then Ginny remember that it was in her purse. She reached onto the floor beside her and found her purse. She opened her purse and fiddled with the zipper on its inner pocket. Finally, she had it open. She reached inside for her knife, but it was not inside there either.

* * *

DRACO

Draco was walking down a staircase. He was on his way to the Great  
Hall. He had skipped all of his morning classes, he had not really felt  
like going after all the had happened last night.

Draco sat down at the Slytherin table. He helped himself to some  
food. He did not talk to anyone at the table. Nobody noticed though  
because he never talked to anybody anymore. He was eating a sandwich when  
he realized that his sleeve was slightly rolled up, revealing the fresh  
cuts on his arm. He hastily pulled the sleeve down looking around to see  
if anyone had seen. He turned and met the icy gaze of Blaise Zabini.

Draco set down his sandwich and left the table. He and Zabini had  
never really been friends but its not like they were enemies either. Blaise  
really had no reason to tell anyone if he did know Draco's secret. The  
Slytherin guys tended to mind their own business. It was the girls who  
stuck their noses into everyone's business.

"Malfoy!" Draco heard his name being called from behind him. It was  
Zabini.

"Zabini," Draco drawled.

"I think we need to talk Malfoy," Blaise said.

"Why's that?"

"I know that you self-harm," Blaise said steadily.

"How would you know that?"

"I've seen the marks on your arms more than once."

"You have no proof," Draco said, slightly nervous now.

"Well, if you don't cut yourself, can I see your arms?"

Draco was caught. He sighed and pulled up his sleeve. The rough  
material of his robes brushed against his fresh cuts making them bleed  
again. Draco saw Zabini eying his arms.

"Why do you do that to yourself?"

"Why is that any of your fucking business Zabini?"

"I'm making it my business Malfoy. If you don't tell me what I want  
to know I may have to go have a visit with Snape about this."

"I cut to get away from my problems, but I wouldn't expect you to  
understand that."

Blaise Zabini came from a fairly good family. His Father was a Death  
Eater but his parents still loved him. They did not abuse him or harm  
him in any way.

"What kind of problems can you possibly have that would cause you to  
physically harm yourself?"

"Do you know my Father? Do I have to show the marks and scars on my  
back and chest that have been put there by him?"

* * *

GINNY

Ginny was tearing around the dorm in a mad rage. She had thrown  
everything out of her trunk. She had looked all through her drawers and  
all through her bed. Her knife was nowhere to be found. She walked down  
the stairs and looked through the Common Room. It was not in there  
either.

She ran through the portrait hole and ran all along where she and  
Draco had walked that morning. She reached the Astronomy Tower and  
looked inside it. Her knife was not in there either. Ginny ran out of  
the tower and down into the dungeons. She had Potions class and she did  
not want to be late. She would have to look for her blade later.

She ran into the room and sat down in her seat. There were only a few  
other students in the room. Those students were looking at her oddly  
because she was breathing so hard. Finally, after what seemed like  
hours, the rest of the class arrived. Snape stood at the front of the  
room and taught them how to make a potion. Ginny was not really paying  
attention but managed to make the potion properly anyway. She had always  
been good with potions.

* * *

1 WEEK LATER. BEFORE THE DANCE

Ginny still had not been able to find her knife. She had been going  
insane for half the week. Finally, one morning when she was in the  
shower she had grabbed her razor and cut her legs a bit. After cutting  
herself, she had felt much better than she had all week. There was a  
Hogsmeade trip coming up in a few weeks. She figured she could buy a new  
knife during the trip.

Ginny was getting her costume on for the dance. She and Draco were  
going as Professors Trelawney and Snape. She had put on a set of very,  
bright, colourful robes. She was wearing very thick, bug glasses like  
Trelawney's and she had asked the old Professor what perfume she wore and  
had bought it the week before. She was wearing a purple bandana to cover  
her bright, red hair.

Ginny surveyed herself in the mirror. She actually looked like a  
young version of Trelawney. She slipped on the shoes that she had bought  
for a Halloween costume two years before. She pulled a long chain over  
her head. It had a small model of a crystal ball on it. She looked at  
herself in the mirror once more and left her dorm.

* * *

DRACO GETTING READY FOR THE DANCE

Draco had spent a long time arguing with Blaise the week before. He  
finally thought that now Blaise might rather understand. In fact, he and  
Draco had been hanging around each other lately. They had been walking  
to class together and sitting together at meals and in class. Some might  
even call them friends if asked.

Draco had slipped on his darkest set of black robes. He had charmed  
his shoulder-length blood hair black. He had put a spell on his nose to  
make it appear much longer than it actually was. As he looked in the  
mirror, he found that he actually did look very much like Snape.

As Draco walked down the stairs and into the Common Room, he watched  
some of the other Slytherins step back. Did they actually think that he  
was Snape? He walked out of the Common Room and down the dark, musty  
hall. He was supposed to be meeting Ginny outside the Gryffindor Common  
Room. She was not outside when he got there so he decided to knock. He  
saw Seamus Finnigan stick his head out of the hole.

"Wow, Professor Snape, you scared me, what can I help you with?"  
Finnigan asked.

"I'm not Snape, its Draco Malfoy," Draco said, mentally smacking  
himself. Why hadn't he just said that he was Snape?

"What the hell do you want Malfoy?"

"I was supposed to meet Ginny Weasley here, but she wasn't outside, so  
I knocked."

"And why are you meeting Ginny?"

"Not that it's any of your business, but we are attending the dance  
together."

"Right-" Seamus was about to say something, but was interrupted by  
Ginny.

"Hello Draco, is Seamus giving you any trouble?"

"No, none at all, let's go. Bye Finnigan," Draco said with a smirk.

Seamus just stood with his head out the hole, gaping after them.

* * *

IN THE GREAT HALL

As Ginny and Draco entered into the Great Hall, they saw about half of  
the people in the room turn to look at them. They realized that no one  
knew who they were. They looked so much like the two teachers that they  
were portraying that they were unrecognizable as themselves.

They went and sat down at a table and waited to see if anyone would  
figure out who they really were. They then noticed Ron walking over to  
see them.

"Ginny? Is that you in there? Great costume. But why are you  
sitting with Professor Snape?" Ron asked.

"Ron, you idiot, this is Draco," Ginny said laughing.

"Draco? Malfoy? What the hell are you doing with my sister?" Ron  
shouted.

"Its like called a date Weasley. But I wouldn't expect you to  
understand English." Draco said sarcastically.

Ron stood up from the table and stomped away. He turned and glared at  
Draco on his way out of the Great Hall.

"Wow, I would have thought that he would have tried to curse you,"  
Ginny said.

"Yeah, me too actually," Draco said suspiciously. "It's almost as if  
he already knew that we have been seeing each other."

"Oh well. Come on, let's dance," Ginny said standing up and grabbing  
his arm.

Ginny and Draco had been dancing for about three songs when they  
noticed some of the students turning and staring at them. It was not  
because a Malfoy was dancing with a Weasley though. It was because they  
thought that they were actually Snape and Trelawney. They laughed and  
went back to dancing.

The next song was a slow song so the pace of the dancing changed.  
Ginny rested her head on Draco's shoulder.

"Thank you," she said.

"For what?" Draco asked.

"For bringing me to the dance, I wasn't planning on going you know,"  
Ginny said.

"Glad I could be of service," Draco joked.

Draco turned towards the doorway of the Hall. He suddenly saw a hand  
and wand appear out of thin air. The next thing Draco knew his legs had  
turned to mush beneath him and he falling to the floor.

* * *

AN: Well, that's the end of chapter 7. The dance was not really that big of a deal. It was just a gateway to let something else happen I guess. The next chapter should be up around Thursday so you have until then to review for this chapter.

Your reviews really do make my day though. Therefore, if you have the time, I understand if you don't, could you please write a few words to tell me what you think of my writing and this fic. You can tell me some ideas that you think might be good for this story if you want.


	9. Chapter 8

AN: Hey guys. Well, this is chapter 8, I guess. I am not sure when the next chapter will be up, but it may be a bit longer than usual. I do not really know where the plot should go right now. I have some ideas for the future, but I am just not sure what to do with it after this chapter, between the different happenings. So yeah, anyway, you guys just want to read though right?

Reviewer response...-

Kneh13 – you are always my first reviewer. (. I am very glad that you are enjoying the story so far, I hope that I will not disappoint you with the rest of it. You will find out soon enough who the invisible person was, and what they did.

Ckat44 – you're always there reviewing me, I really appreciate it. Yeah, I would have added more to the dance, but I didn't really want the plot to dwell on that. I wanted it to be more of a beginning of something new in the fic. I promise that Snape will be involved in this fic, just not yet.

Rose Petel – Yes, I have a feeling that there may be a big blow up in the future...especially with the Weasley family. That family can't stay perfect and wonderful to each other forever right?

Cinnamon Angel – I agree, D/G is definitely my favourite ship. I'm glad that you thought that that part was well written, it was pretty easy to write though. About my new story. I haven't started it yet and I'm not sure where it is going to go. I probably will post it, but if not, I will send it to you. That poem, "Dolly", was excellent by the way.

AN: Well, that didn't take long; there were only four of you last chapter. Now, onto Chapter 8.

* * *

CHAPTER 8

Draco didn't remember much about the dance. He remembered that after he had collapsed everyone had turned and looked at him. Suddenly there had been people rushing all around him. He had woken up hours later in the hospital wing, which now brought him to his predicament. What had happened that had caused him to collapse? He remembered seeing a floating arm...Wait! A floating arm? That did not make sense at all. However, Draco didn't have time to worry about the flying appendages because at that moment Madam Pomfrey bustled into the room.

"Oh, finally you're up Mr. Malfoy! Now we can start your treatment!"

"Treatment?"

"Yes, you poor soul. You had all of the bones in your legs removed during our Halloween dance. Some cruel prank no doubt. But we shall be discussing that later. Right now I need you to drink this Skele-Gro," she said thrusting a cup full of a strange, black liquid at him. Draco drank the Skele-Gro, it tasted foul, but he swallowed it anyway.

"What happened?"

"We're not really sure. Several students reported having seen a wand and arm floating in the air. The leads to only one thing...An invisibility cloak."

Ginny was pacing around in her dorm. Why wasn't she allowed into the hospital wing to visit Draco? Was there something seriously wrong? What the hell had happened anyway? She ran around the dorm madly, once again looking for her knife. She finally gave up and walked down to the Common Room.

She saw her brother and Harry sitting on a couch. Ron was looking rather smug for some reason. Ginny walked over and plonked herself down into the armchair across from them.

"Hello Gin," Ron said.

"Hey," she sighed.

"What's wrong? Is it Malfoy? You should not have hung around him Ginny. I could have warned you, if you had told me what you were getting into. I'm just glad I took care of it." Ron said.

"Yeah...Wait! Took care of it? It was you? Ron! What the fuck did you do to Draco?" Ginny shouted, causing all head to turn to her.

"I just used a simple spell that I picked up from Lockhart a while back." Ron said.

Ginny glared at him and stormed out of the Common Room.

"So Ron, what did you do to Malfoy?" Harry asked after she had left.

"I simply used the spell that Lockhart used on your arm in 2nd year Harry."

"That was a bit harsh wasn't it?"

"He was hanging around with Ginny. She should not be spending her time with his kind," Ron explained his opinion.

"Whatever," Harry said.

Ginny ran all the way down to the hospital wing. Madam Pomfrey would have to let her in no matter what. If they wouldn't let Ginny in, then she would sit outside the hospital wing on the floor until they decided to let her in. When she finally got to the hospital wing, the door was locked. She knocked softly on the door until Madam Pomfrey opened it for her.

"Miss Weasley, what can I do for you? Are you feeling sick?"

"No, Madam, I was wondering if I could come in and see Draco Malfoy," Ginny said.

"Well, he isn't supposed to be having any visitors, he is sleeping," she explained.

"Please, let me in. I'll only be a few minutes, I promise not to wake him up," Ginny begged.

"Oh all right Miss Weasley, but only for five minutes," Pomfrey said.

"Thank you," Ginny said, following her inside.

Ginny went over and sat down beside Draco's bed.

"I'll let you know when your time is up," Madam Pomfrey said, leaving the room.

Ginny reached out and grabbed Draco's hand. Immediately he had a good grip on her hand. Ginny looked up at his face, he was still sleeping. She could tell that he was in pain though. She looked to his bedside table and saw the bottle of Skele-Gro. She remembered when Harry had had to drink that stuff after a quidditch game in his 2nd year. Ginny sat with him quietly for well over five minutes before Madam Pomfrey came and asked her to go to her own bed.

Draco woke up the next day and found that he had some bone back in his legs. It wasn't completely back though because he couldn't move his legs properly. Madam Pomfrey then walked in. How on earth did that woman always know when he was awake or not?

"Mr. Malfoy, good morning, I hope you didn't sleep too badly. I need you to drink some more of the Skele-Gro and perhaps have some breakfast here in the hospital wing," she said, handing him another cup of the horrid, dark liquid.

"Just out of curiosity, Madam, where are my things?" Draco asked. All he was wearing was a hospital robe; he couldn't see the robes that he had been wearing the night before.

"All of your clothing is in a box under your bed. There was a large knife in the pocket of your robes that I had to confiscate. I won't report you with it, but if I catch you with another knife I will have to go to the Headmaster," Madam Pomfrey explained.

"Alright, thank you Madam Pomfrey," Draco said as she was leaving.

Shit. She had his knife. Draco had nothing to cut himself with and was beginning to feel very anxious. He knew that even if he could cut himself he shouldn't, especially in the hospital wing. He could be caught very easy around this place. Suddenly Ginny walked in, she had just about scared the shit out of me.

"Draco, you're awake," she stated.

"I am. Good morning beautiful," that was a first. Draco had never complimented anyone before.

"Good morning to you too. How are you feeling? How are your legs?"

"I'm feeling better. The bones are almost completely back in my legs."

"I'm glad. It's my fault, you know. This never would have happened to you if it weren't for my family and me. It was Ron who did this to you."

"I don't care. I figured it was a Gryffindor who did it. It is not your fault that your brother is a git."

"I just wonder how he had so much time to plan what he did. He never knew that we were spending time together. Although, I suppose he must have known. Because he mentioned something today about how I shouldn't have been spending so much time with you," Ginny said.

"Well, that's not really important right now anyway," Draco said.

"Yeah, I guess. Do you think you will be healthy enough to go to Hogsmeade this weekend?" Ginny asked him.

"I think so, why?" Draco said.

"Well, I need to buy a new knife," Ginny said sadly.

"What's wrong with the one that you have?"

"Had," Ginny said quietly.

"What happened to your knife?"

"I can't find it. I hope that I lost it and that someone didn't take it though. I suppose I could get in trouble for having a huge knife at school," Ginny said.

"It depends on who catches you with the knife. I had my knife in the pocket of my robes and Pomfrey confiscated it. But she told me that she wasn't planning on reporting me unless I was caught with a knife again sometime in the future."

"So, you will come with me? And maybe you will buy yourself another knife as well?"

"No. I won't buy another knife," Draco said stubbornly.

"Why not? You will go crazy without one."

"I'll manage. I will not buy another knife. I refuse to do it."

"Ok, ok. So I'll see you on Saturday then." Ginny said.

Draco was released from the hospital wing on Friday. On Saturday he made his way up to the Gryffindor Tower again, praying Ginny would be waiting for him this time. She was.

"Hello Draco. How are your legs feeling?" Ginny greeted him.

"Hey Gin, they feel much better now."

"Shall we go? We have important things to be doing." Ginny didn't say anything about buying a knife because people had started coming out of the Common Room and they were all staring at the two of them.

"Why are all of you people staring at us? Is there something wrong with two people from different houses going to Hogsmeade together on a Saturday?" Draco asked.

"Well ye-" someone started to say but Ginny and Draco just turned and walked away.

Once they got to Hogsmeade they had a bit of trouble getting to the store that they had planned on going to. There was a small knife store called "The Bloody Knife" in Hogsmeade that they had planned on going to. However, it wasn't exactly in the nicest part of the town. People had been watching them all day and every time they started going in that direction they saw a student or a teacher eying them.

"Ok, you know what? I say we just go and who cares if anyone sees us or not." Ginny said.

"I agree, come on, this way," Draco said, turning a corner.

Finally, they were standing outside "The Bloody Knife". They looked at each other and walked inside. Ginny looked around the store for about 15 minutes. She looked at all of the different knives and their prices. Finally, she picked a plain knife with a brown handle. It looked like an average kitchen knife. After they got outside Draco stopped her.

"Why did you buy a knife that was so plain? The other knives weren't too expensive; you could have bought a nicer one."

"I don't want to waste my money on a big, fancy knife when I already own a nice one. I'm still hoping to find my old knife." Ginny explained.

"Ok, come on; let's go get a drink or something." Draco said.

They walked down the street a bit before seeing a small pub. They went inside the pub and found it nearly empty. They ordered two Butterbeers and sat at a small table in the back.

"Did you have a good day?" Draco asked.

"I guess you could say that. I'm glad that I bought a new knife."

"Yeah, now you can start cutting again," Draco said with false enthusiasm.

"It's not like I had quit cutting anyway. I've been cutting myself with a razor since I lost my knife."

"You've been cutting? I thought that you had quit in the time that you didn't have your knife. No wonder no one realizes you cut. I didn't even notice." Draco said, shaking his head.

"Yeah well, what about you? Have you been cutting since Madam Pomfrey took your knife?"

"No, I've never cut myself with anything but that knife and I don't plan on starting now."

"So, as long as you don't have that knife, you've basically quit cutting."

"Precisely."

"Are you going to try to get it back?"

"You can count on it."

* * *

Well, that's the end of chapter 8. I hope you all enjoyed it. Not much really happened. Except that now we know that Draco is going to fight to get his knife back from wherever it now is. The next chapter should be out between Thursday and Sunday. I usually only write on Thurs – Sun, so you can generally count on a chapter from me somewhere in there.

Anyway, write a review you want. They inspire me to write, so by reviewing you are helping me to write this fic.


	10. Chapter 9

AN: Hey guys, it has been a little while since my last update. I have been very busy. Also, not that you guys really care, but I went to a concert yesterday. I went to see the Arrogant Worms. You guys probably don't know who they are, but if you did, you would want to go to their concerts too.

Thanks to:

Cinnamon Angel – Hello! Yes, Madam Pomfrey is seriously annoying me in my story, as is Ron. Yes, I do believe that the knives are really the centre of this story. There will be some interesting stuff said about Draco's knife in this chapter that will come into play later on in the story. Ah, my notebook. It is more of a binder really. Well actually, it is, it's a three-ring binder filled with lined paper. It has two pockets on the front and back cover that have lots of little things in them. They have stuff that I wrote when I was at camp and they have some poetry that I printed off the internet sitting in them. Your stuff is all in it. My binder was a journal so there are a few journal entries in it. But now it's just more of a book that I write in. There are random things in it that will be in this story later on, hopefully. However, as of the past few weeks, there have been poems in it, not very good so far, but it does have poems. I also destroyed my journal as you did. I cut it up into little pieces, I was terrified that someone would read it and find out that I cut.

Kneh13 – Yes, Ron is being very Slytheriny, what a jerk he is eh? More of the story should be up around next week sometime. Hope you like this chapter.

ckat44 - I spent along time thinking about what Ron could do to Draco. And then I was watching the 2nd Harry Potter movie and I saw the scene where Lockhart removes the bones from Harry's arm. I then went through the book looking for the spell that he used. However, there was no spell, they didn't show what Lockhart said. This presented a problem to me. Should I make up a spell or use a different spell. I just decided to have it done from across the room so that the spell wouldn't be heard when it was said.

Joey – I'm glad that you are enjoying reading this. I am also interested to see where I will take this story...

sandwichbitch – Hey, I am happy that you are enjoying my writing. There is a good reason why Draco will only use his knife. That should be revealed in this chapter, if all goes as planned.

Happy-little-hobbit – I am glad that you think so. I hope that you enjoy the rest of the story.

Rose petel – Thanks! I hope that you enjoy reading this as much as I like writing it!

Whew, that took me a little while, but now onto chapter #9

* * *

A few days after Ginny bought her knife she and Draco were sitting alone in the Astronomy Tower. Draco was sitting looking rather uncomfortable.

"Is something wrong?" Ginny asked him.

"What? Oh, no, of course nothing is wrong. I just haven't cut in a long time, that's all. I think I'm going insane," Draco said.

"Why don't you just buy another knife? You can afford one."

"No."

"Why not?"

"I can't tell you," Draco said.

"Fine," Ginny said, standing up and leaving the tower.

Ginny was somewhat angry. In the short amount of time she had spent with Draco, she had learned that she didn't need to hide things from him. She could tell him anything without even thinking twice. She wanted him to feel the same way, but obviously he didn't.

Ginny walked up to the Gryffindor Tower and into her dorm. She pulled out her new knife. It was so plain compared to her other one. She hadn't actually used it since she bought it. She wasn't sure why she hadn't cut herself with it yet. But now, it was different, she was so angry that she didn't care what knife she was using to cut herself.

She brought the knife down into her arm and pushed it in very deep. She pulled the knife away and watched as blood started to ooze out of the fresh cut. She drove the knife into her arm again. I longer cut this time. The knife was very sharp and the cut was very deep. Blood started to run down Ginny's arm. She wiped her knife off on a tissue and put it back into her drawer. She sat on her bed for a long while after that and cried.

Ginny was wandering around the school aimlessly the next day after class when she smacked right into someone.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, I wasn't paying attention!"

"Miss. Weasley, perhaps we should pay attention when-" but suddenly Snape stopped in mid-sentence. Her sleeve was rolled up a bit and the cuts from the day before could easily be seen. Ginny hastily pulled her sleeve down.

"I'm sorry Professor, it won't happen again," she said walking away very quickly.

She ran around a corner and smashed into someone else.

"Oh no, not again, look I'm sorry," she said, looking up to meet a pair of cold, silver eyes.

"Ginny, come with me, I need to tell you everything."

Draco grabbed Ginny's hand and started pulling her down in a direction that she was not familiar with in the school. Suddenly she realized that he was leading her into a section of the dungeons that she was unfamiliar with.

"Draco? Where are we going?" She asked.

"My room," Draco answered.

Finally they got to a portrait of a snake. Draco stopped walking and turned to the snake.

"Mudbloods," he said to the snake.

The portrait-hole opened and he pulled Ginny inside. He lead her quickly through the Common Room. There were many students sitting around inside. They started yelling obscenities at Draco and Ginny while they were walking through. Ginny wondered if they had been treating Draco like this since the dance. He lead her up a long staircase and down a narrow hallway. At the very end of the hallway there was a portrait of two snakes wrapped around a sword.

"Malfoy Family Crest." Draco informed her. "Orillia" he said, the door opened. "Orillia was my grandmother's name."

Ginny followed him into the room. It was a dark room and Ginny could see why. The walls were black. The whole room was black except the carpet and the furniture, they were silver.

"You have your own room?" Ginny asked in awe.

"Yes, a lot of the Slytherin students do. Parents can spend extra money for their children to have their own rooms in Slytherin. I finally convinced my parents to let me have one last week after an incident in my dorm room. They didn't want me to have one before because they wanted me to have as much access to the other students as possible. They don't do that in Gryffindor?"

"No, they don't. You have a couch in your room."

"Yes, I have a bathroom too. Anyway, come sit down." Draco said.

They sat down on the couch and turned towards each other. Draco opened his mouth as if he was about to say something. But then he closed it and sighed.

"I don't really know how to explain it, but I need you to know about my knife."

"I'll try not to interrupt while you're talking," Ginny offered.

"That'd be great. Well, I guess I should start by talking about my Father. He is a Death Eater, as you probably already knew. He has this thing for weapons like knives and swords and such. And it's a tradition in my family that as a child the Malfoy children need to be bonded to a weapon. When I was 6 years old I was cursed with my knife. It was supposed to help me have a 'better relationship" with my dark side. It was supposed to make me want to kill people more. The knife was cursed and it was supposed to make me harm others."

"Supposed to? As in you never did hurt others?" Ginny asked.

"Exactly, I didn't want to hurt others. I don't think my Father or his family ever thought about the knife turning to the person that it was bonded to and harming them instead. That's why I cut and that's why I must have my knife back. I need to cut myself, I'm addicted to it. Although, if I ever cut myself with anything but my knife then I most likely end up dead."

"Wow. I always thought you had it good. Before I really knew you at all I thought that you had a good relationship with your family. You reminded me of your Father. But now, I realize, that you are absolutely nothing like your father at all."

"I hate my Father," Draco said.

Just then Draco looked so lost that Ginny could not help but wrap her arms around him in a hug. She almost expected him to pull away from her, but he didn't. He fell right into her arms. Ginny held him for a few moments before coming to a conclusion.

"We have to get your knife back," she said.

"Will you help me?" Draco asked her.

"Of course. Because I know that sooner or later you will need to cut yourself and I don't want you to end up dead. So if you have to cut yourself, than we need to find your knife."

A couple days later Ginny was sitting in the Gryffindor Common Room, reading, when Ron and Harry came in. Harry said something to Ron and went upstairs to the dorms. Ron, on the other hand, came and sat across from Ginny.

"Ginny, I need to talk to you," Ron said.

"So talk," she said bitterly.

"Are you still hanging around with Malfoy?"

"Not that its any of your business, but yes, yes I am."

"Then maybe I did the right thing."

"What did you do Ron?"

"Well, no, its nothing really. Its just that a few weeks ago I was in your dorm looking for something and I came across a very large knife. Now, I know that Malfoy harms himself, the freak, and I knew that you must have taken his knife away. But, you see, I also know that you're kind of soft and that you would eventually given it back so I grabbed it-"

"You did what?"

"Now, Ginny, don't be mad, you know that I've done the right thing-"

"What the fuck were you doing in my dorm Ron?"

"Watch your language little sister. I was just trying to help."

"Give me that knife back right now!"

"Oh, no way, you'll just give it back to your little boyfriend!"

"Ron, I swear I-" but then Ginny started to cry and she had to leave the room. She ran out the portrait hole and down into the dungeons praying that Draco would be there. She ran to where he had lead her only days before. She got to the portrait of the snake and paused before saying the password.

"Mudbloods," she said. It was a dirty word and she felt horrible for saying it. Even if it had only been said to a painting. She ran through the Common Room. Everyone was glaring at her and called out rude names. She ran up the staircase and flew into the hallway. She ran to Draco's room and said the password. Draco was inside sitting at his desk. She collapsed onto his couch.

"Ginny! What's going on? What's wrong?"

"Ronhasmyknife!"

"What? Slow down, what about your knife?"

Ron! He has my knife!"

"Your old one?"

"Yes."

"How did he get it?"

"He took it out of my purse. He thought that it was yours. He figured that I had taken it to try and get you to quit cutting or something. GAH! I hate my brother!"

"Well, lets go force the little bugger to give it back shall we?"

Draco stood up and offered Ginny his hand. She took it and followed him out of the dorm. They were walking through the Common Room when Draco stopped. He turned to Blaise.

"Hey Zabini," Draco said.

"Malfoy," Zabini nodded.

After they were in the hall Ginny questioned him.

"Are you friends with him? I've noticed the two of you around."

"Blaise Zabini and I were never really friends before. But he knows about my cutting. He's the only Slytherin that has really stuck by me since the dance."

"I'm sorry."

"Its not your fault. I wanted to go to the dance with you."

Ginny wiped the tears off of her face and they began walking out of the dungeons. It was a long walk between the Gryffindor Tower and the Slytherin Dungeon. By the time they got to the Tower Ginny had been gone for three quarters of an hour. Ginny said the password.

"Sorting Hat," and they were in.

Ron was sitting with Harry and Hermione in their usual spot by the fireplace. Draco and Ginny walked over to them, turning many heads along the way.

"Weasley, I hear you have something that belongs to me," Draco said.

"Why Malfoy, I don't know what you're talking about," Ron said.

"Oh, I think you do. I think it would be very wise of you to give it to me now," everyone was listening by now.

"I must say Malfoy, you are a freak, and a coward for what you do."

"Stop shitting around Weasley and give me the bloody knife."

"Ron, just give it back, please," Ginny pleaded.

"Ginny, stay out of this. This is between me and your freaky boyfriend."

"Ron, it belongs to me and I want it back."

"What?"

"The knife, its mine, and I want it back right fucking now," Ginny said.

* * *

AN: Well that's chapter #9. I hope you guys enjoyed reading it. Come on, tell me whether you liked it or not. Give me a review, please. I live off of your feedback. :D give me the thumbs up...or the thumbs down, you pick your poison.


	11. Chapter 10

AN: Since I have some freetime on this lovely, snowy Saturday morning I suppose I'll write something for you nice folk. But first, reviewer response thingy.

Sandwichbitch – Yes, I do believe it was a...gasp a cliffy. But here I am again, so soon, updating my story. Chocolate will definitely help in your time of waiting though. (

Happy-little-hobbit – I'm glad that you liked the last chapter. I hope you like this one as much. (

Nallie – I'm glad that you're enjoying my story. Thank you for your good wishes. I hope to quit cutting sometime in the future. I'm very glad that you're doing better now.

Durfaniel – I'm glad that you like my story. You will never be alone. There will always be people who cut, whether it's me or someone else. I'm addicted to it too, just like you and Ginny.

Kneh13 – I'm glad you liked the last chapter, I rather liked it too. Ron is such a jerk. You don't remember who has Draco's? Pomfrey took it. But whether or not she still has it...you'll just have to wait and see.

Cinnamon Angel – Yeah, I rather like Draco being bonded to his knife, if I do say so myself. I wanted to Draco to have a reason for why he wouldn't cut with any other knife, Until Thursday night I was stumped. But I had a PA day yesterday at school so I wanted to update yesterday. I was lying in bed on Thursday thinking about my story, and it just came to me. I hope that someday my poetry will be on your walls as well. :D. You're not pathetic. Cutting is something that has taken over our lives and we need to fight it.

AN: Anyway, on to the chapter. I went to see the Butterfly Effect yesterday. It was awesome, but kind of strange. Anyway, that movie and your reviews inspired me to write more of my story so soon.

* * *

CHAPTER 10

Ron just stopped. He turned to look at Ginny.

"You...What?"

"That knife belongs to me and I want it back," Ginny said calmly.

"Ginny, why do you have a knife?"

"That is none of your business. And you had no right to take my belongings out of my purse!"

"I'm trying to protect you Ginny!"

"Well stop!"

"Why the hell do you have a knife?"

"Why does anyone have a knife?"

"Are you...Like him?"

"So what if I am. Ron, I swear, give it back or I'll kill myself."

"Ron, I don't think she's joking," Hermione said.

Ron handed the knife to Ginny.

"I'm going to be keeping an eye on you Ginny. If I suspect that you're doing anything like what he does I'll be telling mum in a split second," with that he stomped up the stairs into his dorm.

Over the next few days Ginny cut herself very frequently. But she did it in places that no one would see. She cut herself on her shoulders and her hips. She even cut her ankles. Draco was beginning to worry about her. He knew that she was cutting. He could just tell. He wished that he could cut himself, but he didn't dare to do it with anything but his knife.

About a week after Ron had given Ginny her knife back Draco had a plan.

"Tonight, I want you to sneak in with me to get my knife back."

"What if we get caught?"

"We won't, Madam Pomfrey isn't here tonight."

"Why not?"

"She was called away on family business for the night," Draco said.

"How do you know that?"

"I'm a Slytherin, we have our ways," Draco said slyly.

"Ok..."

"Will you help me?"

"Of course," Ginny said.

"Ok, meet me outside the hospital wing tonight..."

* * *

Ginny walked silently down the corridor that night, praying she wouldn't be seen. She was supposed to meet Draco at midnight. As she walked in the dark she thought about Draco. Were they romantically involved? They had shared the occasional kiss and they held hands when they walked together. But Ginny just wasn't sure.

Finally, she reached the hospital wing to find Draco standing outside waiting.

"Hey, sorry if I'm late," she whispered.

"No, you're not late, come on," he said leading her inside.

"Shouldn't that have been locked?"

"I took care of it."

Ginny was silent as she followed him through the clean, white hallways of the hospital wing. She wasn't sure exactly where she was going, but she assumed it was some sort of office. She found out that she was right when they reached a clean room with a desk in it. Draco walked into the room and started looking in the desk. Ginny followed suit and began searching the filing cabinet.

"I found it!" Draco said pulling his knife out of the bottom drawer of Pomfrey's desk.

"Good, lets get out of here," Ginny said.

"Not so fast Mr. Malfoy, Miss Weasley." It was Professor Binns.

"Good evening Professor," Draco said, his knife nowhere in site.

"Don't good evening me, Malfoy. Just what exactly do you think you're doing in here?"

"Just going for an evening stroll Sir, no harm in that is there?"

"No harm, except when it's after hours and you happen to be in someone's private office."

"Are we in an office Sir? I didn't even notice!" Draco said sarcastically, looking around.

"Yes, Malfoy you are."

"Oh, we're ever so sorry, we didn't realize where we were," Draco said.

"Really, Professor, we didn't mean any harm," Ginny said, trying not to laugh.

"Are you both insane?"

"Possibly," Draco said.

"Most likely," Ginny said.

"Merlin, you are insane," Professor Binns said.

'Yes, yes Sir, I think we are," Draco said.

"I think I'd better walk you two back to your dorms now," he said.

"Yes, Professor, I think you'd better," Ginny told him.

And with that Professor Binns walked them both to their dorms. All the way back they marvelled at how crazy their History of Magic teacher was himself.

"I cannot believe we got away with that," Ginny said the next day.

"Professor Binns has been asking me all day if I'm feeling alright," Draco laughed.

"So how's your knife?"

"Same as always, still cuts the same," Draco said.

"That's good, so you've started again?"

"Oh yeah. I almost wish that I hadn't gotten my knife back, because I know I shouldn't cut. But I think I will literally go insane without it."

"Yeah, I had a panic attack when I lost my knife. I don't know how you kept your cool when Madam Pomfrey took your knife."

"I was about to slice her head off, if I'd had my knife to do it," Draco said.

"I would have bitten her head off, like I almost did to Ron."

"How is Weasley anyway?"

"He's practically been stalking me," Ginny said.

"Well, its almost Christmas, is he going home?"

"Yeah, he and Harry and Hermione are going to my house for the holidays," she explained.

"Well, you should stay," he said, hoping she would.

"I think I'm going to. I don't want to spend the holidays with Ron watching me over my shoulder every two seconds."

"Let me know if you're staying. Most of the Slytherins go home so we can hang out in my dorm instead of this old tower," Draco said smiling.

"Yeah."

Two weeks later the school was almost completely cleared out except  
for one Gryffindor, a Slytherin and a couple of Hufflepuffs.

Ginny was sitting with Draco in his room. He was doing homework and  
she was sitting reading a book. Even though they weren't talking they  
enjoyed each others company.

"Do you want to go for a walk around the grounds?" Draco asked  
suddenly.

"Sure, why not," Ginny said putting her book down.

And so they left to go outside and go for a walk in the snow. Once  
they got outside they just started to wander around and somehow ended up  
over near the lake.

"You know, some people are kind of scared of the lake because of the  
sea monster that lives in it, but I think it's beautiful," Ginny said  
looking around

"Yes, I'm going to have to agree with you," Draco said.

"What? You, a boy, thinks that a lake is pretty?"

"Well, not as pretty as you, but yes, still pretty," Draco said.

Ginny blushed, turned, and gave Draco a hug.

"What is with you and hugging? I was hoping for a kiss, but I guess  
this will have to do," Draco laughed.

"A kiss eh? I think you'd have to be my boyfriend for that one."

"Boyfriend? Did you just ask me out woman?"

"Yes, yes I believe I did."

"All right then," Draco said.

And with that Draco got his kiss.

The next morning Ginny and Draco actually ate a meal in the Great Hall  
rather than going down to the kitchen to eat. They were sitting at the  
empty Gryffindor Table. Suddenly a large owl came in and dropped the  
Daily Prophet in front of Ginny. She picked it up and began to read it.  
Suddenly Ginny nearly choked on her toast.

"What is it?" Draco asked.

"Justin Flinch-Fletchy committed suicide last night."

* * *

Well, I'm sorry this chapter took so long to get out. I was expecting  
to have it out a couple of days after the other one. But then, I decided  
to quit cutting and I didn't write anything but poetry for the next few  
days. If any of you are interested in reading my poetry, it's at  
fictionpress under the same screen name. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed  
this chapter. I know it's not up to standard, but oh well, it's the best  
I can do right now.


	12. Chapter 11

AN: Hey guys, sorry for the wait again. A lot of shit happened. I just found out that one of my best friends has cancer, so, ya, that rather brings my spirits down. I still haven't cut though :D

Thanks to:

Catmint – I'm glad that its accurate, I'm always worried that my stuff isn't. I'm glad that you haven't really been cutting yourself much. I hope I can stay not cutting. Thanks for telling me what Justin's name was, I was too lazy to look it up in the book the other day.

Sandwichbitch – Glad you liked it. Yeah, Binns is fun, lol, maybe I can work some more of him into the story.

GinnyWeasley888 – I'm glad you like it. Yeah, I used to cut, it's not something I'm proud of, but for some reason I'm not really embarrassed to talk about it on here. Probably because I don't really know any of you guys. If any of my school friends found out I would be embarrassed.

Ckat44 – I'm sorry that you feel that way. I can't really help it if my story encourages other people to cut. If they think that they can't handle it than they shouldn't be reading it anymore. If someone started cutting because of me or my story I would take it down. I don't cut anymore, but even when I did I don't think I needed counselling, thanks for caring, I guess.

Durfaniel – I'm sorry you had to wait so long for the last chapter. This one took awhile too for a couple of reasons. First: I've been sick, second: I've been writing a lot of poetry recently, and last: I've had some personal stuff that I've needed to work through. But, finally I'm back, posting chapter #11, I hope you like it! I'm glad I stopped cutting too, and I'm glad that you stopped. I desperately want to cut right now though.

Kneh13 – I'm not really sure where all of this is going to go, but I'm sure that it will all lead into something and come together at the end crossed fingers

Cinnamon Angel – Hello you. Glad you're enjoying Ron, lol. Yeah, Professor Binns always just seemed like he could be so much fun to me, I just had to play around with him. Yep, they're finally together, not sure what I'm going to do with that yet. Speaking of your story, when is your next chapter coming out? Yes, a suicide, I'm not exactly sure what I'm going to do with that, it could be interesting though. Don't pull your hair off, the next chapter has arrived!

Also, I'm not sure how to spell Hannah's last name, correct me if I'm wrong.

* * *

CHAPTER 11

"Shit, I don't know what I'd do if someone else in my family died, especially if they took their own life," Ginny said.

"I take it you're not suicidal?"

"God no. I like cutting myself, but I would never take my own life."

"Oh, that's good, I guess," Draco said.

"What? Are you?"

"I've thought about suicide, but I don't think I'd ever do it."

"Good, I don't know what I'd do without you," Ginny said, grabbing Draco's hand.

"Come on, lets go for a walk," Draco said, standing up.

Ginny and Draco walked out of the Great Hall and out onto the grounds. They walked over towards a tree by the lake that they often sat by. But once they got there they realized that there was already someone sitting by the tree. It was Hannah Abbott and she was crying.

* * *

Ron, Harry and Hermione sat silently in a compartment of the Hogwarts express. Ron seemed to be glaring out the window.

"Is something wrong Ron?" Hermione finally asked.

"Yes! They only reason Ginny is staying at the school over the holidays is to spend time with that messed up boyfriend of hers."

"Ron, no offense, but I don't think that Ginny's choice of friends is any of your business."

"It damn right is! She's my little sister and I should have a say in who she can and can't hang around with. I swear I should go straight to mum with this," he said.

"But you wouldn't," Hermione said.

"No, no matter how much I dislike all of this I would never go to mum about any of it. I love Ginny too much to get her into trouble with the rest of the family. Harry? Are you still with us?"

"What? Oh, uh, sorry, I guess I dozed off."

"You've been doing that a lot lately, is everything alright?" Hermione asked him.

"Yeah, its fine."

But in all truth they all knew that everything wasn't alright.

* * *

"Hannah? What's wrong?" Ginny asked the older student.

"Haven't you heard? Justin is dead."

"Yes, I have heard," Ginny said, sitting down beside Hannah.

"Were you going out with him or something?" Draco said sitting down with Ginny.

"What? Malfoy? No, of course not, he was my cousin."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I know how it feels to lose a loved one," Draco said.

"Since when do you care about anything or anybody but yourself Draco Malfoy?"

"Since I met Ginny," he said.

* * *

Harry wasn't sure exactly what to do. He had walked in on Ginny cutting a few days before. He had walked right out of the room without her noticing. It didn't really bother him to watch her do it, it just came as a surprise. Harry used to cut himself. Growing up with the Dursley family, how could he not?

He couldn't really believe that Ginny had been doing it though; she just didn't seem the type. But then, he remembered some stuff about her in the last year. She had kind of drawn back into herself. But, she was so good at hiding her feelings. But, then again, anyone who cuts themselves probably would be.

Should he confront Ginny about what he knew about her? No, he decided that it would be a bad idea, she would probably flip. No, he wouldn't tell her. Not yet.

* * *

"So you're telling me, that you, Draco Malfoy, have actually become a real human being?" Hannah asked, wiping her tears off of her face.

"Yep, now come on, lets go inside, I'm freezing," Draco said, pulling Ginny up.

"No, I think I just want to stay alone out here if you don't mind," Hannah said.

"Well, we do mind, come on, get your mind off it. Come spend the day with us, it'll be fun," Ginny said.

"Well, I guess."

Hannah and Ginny followed Draco all the way down to his dorm. Once they got there, Draco told them he had to use the bathroom and he left the two girls to talk for a minute.

One Draco had gotten into the bathroom he sat down on top of the toilet. This was going to be a long afternoon. It was killing Draco to be nice. He knew that it was the right thing to do, he just wasn't used to being nice to anyone but Ginny.

Draco pulled his knife out of his left pocket. He ran the shiny blade over his hand, lightly cutting the flesh. He rolled up one of his sleeves and pushed the blade quickly into his arm. He would have to be quick or the girls would notice his long absence.

He watched the blood flow out of his first cut for a few moments before striking again. He dragged his knife down his arm in a zigzag pattern. The blood started to flow out quickly and covered the skin below before he got to it with his knife. He cut through the bloody skin on his arm. He watched the blood running down his arm. A little bit ran off of his hand and onto the floor. Draco stood up, washed his hands and walked back into his room.

"Took you long enough," Hannah said.

"Yeah, Draco," Ginny said, looking into his eyes.

Draco quickly looked away from her prying gaze.

"Um, come on, let's go fly or something," he suggested.

"I thought you wanted to get out of the cold," Ginny said.

"I did, but now I'm bored."

"Ok, let's go outside then," Hannah said.

Draco grabbed his broom from his closet and summoned Ginny and Hannah's brooms for them.

They all walked out onto the pitch. Draco was the first one to kick of the ground followed by Ginny. Hannah looked up at them zooming around the pitch and followed them up into the air.

Draco and Ginny were both quite skilled at flying. Hannah wasn't bad at flying, but it wasn't really her thing. She loved to fly, but knew that she would never get really good at it.

* * *

Harry, Hermione and Ron got off of the train and stepped out into the muggle part of the station. They saw Mr. and Mrs. Weasley waiting for them. As soon as the Weasleys noticed all of them standing there they walked quickly over to great them.

"It's just wonderful that you kids could come home for the holidays!" Mrs. Weasley said loudly hugging them all.

"No, problem mum, lets just get out of here," Ron said, starting to walk away.

"What's wrong with Ron?" his mother asked.

"I'm not sure, he has been acting really odd in the last couple of weeks." Hermione said.

Hermione, Harry and the Weasleys then followed Ron over to the car that Mr. Weasley had rented for them. It was going to a very long holiday.

* * *

Draco sighed. It had nearly killed him spending the whole day with a Hufflepuff. She wasn't that bad it was just the fact that he had just done it that was bothering him. He never spent time with anyone from any house but Slytherin. Well, except for Ginny. As soon as he got back into his dorm he collapsed onto his bed. He pulled out his knife and felt a sense of relief.

He rolled up the bottom of his robes. He looked around on his leg, there weren't very many cuts on his legs because he preferred cutting his arms. He brought the knife down onto his leg very hard. He dragged the knife through the flesh of his shin. The blood started pouring out of the gash, staining his socks.

Draco needed to feel pain. Right now he didn't really care about the blood, he just wanted to be in pain. He brought his knife back down and sliced into the cut that he had just made. It made his eyes sting. He brought the knife back down and made a cut right above that last one. He made another cut above that. His leg was bleeding freely now and he was staining the sheets on his bed. He brought his knife back down onto the fresh cuts and dragged it slowly down to his ankle.

He raised the knife from his bloody ankle and aimed a bit higher. He pressed the knife into the top of his knee. Suddenly Draco thought of something that would cause him a lot of pain for the next few days. He stretched out his leg and placed his knife at the back of his knee. He pushed the knife into the tender flesh on the back of his knee. It didn't hurt to much to make the cut, but Draco knew that it would hurt a lot later on because that part of his leg rubbed against everything. Every time Draco sat down he would feel the pain on his leg and remember this horrible day. Draco now brought his knife over to his other leg. He could spare a bit more blood tonight.

* * *

Ginny sat in her dorm. It had been a rough day. It would have been a good day if she hadn't known what it was doing to Draco. She knew that it was horrible for him to have to spend the day with Hannah. She knew that he wasn't ready to spend time with other people just yet. She just hoped that he didn't do anything stupid to himself.

Ginny walked into her dorm. It was completely empty because everyone was gone for the holidays. For once she wouldn't have to worry about someone walking in on her cutting herself. Ginny reached over her bed and grabbed her jacket that she had just thrown off. She pulled her clean knife out of the right pocket.

She stared at her knife for a few moments. It was so pretty. Such a pretty thing didn't deserve to be stained with her blood. This wonderful item shouldn't be cursed to cut her flesh. But Ginny didn't really care. Right now she just wanted to spill some of her blood.

Ginny raised the knife above her left arm. She picked a part of her arm where there were already a bunch of cuts. She cut vertically down through all of the horizontal cuts and watched the blood start to pour out of the fresh cut. She brought the knife down again and pulled it down along her arm down to her hand. She watched as the older cuts reopened and started to bleed as well.

Ginny then turned her knife sideways as someone would when buttering a piece of bread. She brought it into her arm and carved a thin slice of her arm off. That stung like crazy but Ginny didn't care. She watched as the blood poured out of this fresh wound. Ginny set her eyes on the knife. The knife was now covered in skin and blood.

Draco spent a very long time cutting himself that night. After he had finally finished slicing open the backs of his knees, the bottoms of his feet and the inside of his elbows he cleaned everything up. He magically washed the blood out of his sheets, socks and mattress. Right after he had finished there was a tap at his window.

Draco turned to the window to see Telmar, his father's owl. Draco opened the window and let in the large, black creature. The animal dropped a thin letter at Draco's feet and flew back out the window. Draco closed the window behind him and sat back down to read the letter.

It read,

_Son,_

_I'm coming up to the school this weekend. I want to see that you are developing properly. You mother also thinks that I should come and wish you a Happy Christmas. Your mother will not be accompanying me on this trip though. You had better be doing well in school and such. If you have gotten back into cutting yourself than you should be prepared for the consequences._

_Father_

* * *

Well, hey guys, that was chapter 11. I think I'm going to raise the rating up to R; it's gotten a bit more graphic than I suspected.


	13. Chapter 12

AN: hey guys, I just finished my March Break. I barely wrote anything this week, I feel bad. I have a bunch of excuses that you guys probably don't want to hear, but I'll tell you anyway. #1 My Microsoft Word program doesn't work. It uninstalls itself constantly. Usually I can just stick the cd in and reinstall it. Except for the fact that I can't find the cd. So that's problem #1. Problem #2 is that my wrist is killing me. No, I didn't cut myself. I have a bruise. I hit my wrist, well, it kind of grinded, off the side of my bed getting into it and...yeah, it hurts to type. And #3 is, I have been working on another fanfiction. I don't know if I will ever post it, but I have started writing another. I just don't know if it would be a topic that would appeal to anyone...

Reviews:

Rosepetel – I feel sorry for Draco too. His dad won't kill him, but he will be creating some problems.

RubyFoxburrofLoamsdown – I'm glad that you like my writing. I'm 14 and I quit cutting last month, I cut for seven months. I went and looked at your writing over at fictionpress, I liked it, I'm not sure if I reviewed any of it though. If I didn't I will go back and do it in the next few days.

Devils-fire – I'm glad that you like my fic and I'm sorry for almost making you cry. I hate it when people consider cutters freaks as well. My suggestion to you is: don't start. I can't exactly tell you not to, that would make me a hypocrite, but I highly suggest not cutting, it is extremely hard to quit once you've started.

Kneh13 - Yup, Draco is gonna be in some trouble, we'll have to see about that one though eh? There will be more up as soon as I can write it.

Cinnamon Angel – I updated. You did too! Your last chapter was just awesome! It was funny to talk to you, but it's been easier to talk to you lately. Yeah, I'm worried about Draco too, and I'm writing it! It is quite a twist, isn't it? Yeah, go Ron, I'm having fun with this. All of my other fics that I had before never pleased me this much, I wasn't enjoying writing them anymore.

CHAPTER 12

Draco's blood ran cold. His _Father_? If he could even call him that. His father was coming down in...three days. Draco didn't know what to do. Lucius would find out that he was still cutting. Draco couldn't heal any of his cuts, his bond with his blade kept him from healing anything. Draco lifted up his sleeve. His arm was covered in cuts. He knew that his legs and the rest of his body were just as bad. There was no way he could get out of it now.

Draco was about to pull out his knife but thought against it. He didn't need to add more flame to the fire. But then he changed his mind. Right now it didn't really matter if he cut himself, his father would kill him anyway. Maybe Draco should just kill himself now to save his father the trouble of getting his hands dirty.

Draco grabbed his knife. Usually when Draco cut himself he was careful and made sure not to cut so much that he would be in danger of bleeding to death. But, tonight, Draco didn't really care. Draco took off his robe. He sat down on the couch and gripped the knife hard. He pressed the knife against his flesh. He barely felt a twinge of pain. He was numb, beyond feeling. He sliced the knife into his arm and left it in his flesh. He watched as the blood started to pour down onto the knife and on his fingers. Draco did another cut very close, but parallel to the one he had just made. He made about ten cuts all in a row near his elbow.

Suddenly Draco made a quick decision. He did something that he had never done before. He pressed the knife into the thin skin on his wrist. He was shocked at how much blood started pouring out of his wrist. That didn't stop him though. Draco sliced into his wrist again. And Again. Suddenly a wave of dizziness came over him. Draco lifted his knife and cut into his other wrist. The last cut was very small because Draco's vision went very black very quickly.

* * *

Draco woke up hours later, still in his room. But now he wasn't alone. He had bandages on his wrists. He saw Ginny sitting beside him.

"Blaise he's awake," Ginny called.

"Zabini? How long have you had this habit of being in my room when I wake up? It's starting to scare me."

"Whatever. If Ginny hadn't brought me in here yesterday you would be dead right now."

"That was the plan. What happened?"

"Yesterday night I decided to walk over to your room to see if you wanted to talk or something. I came in and found you lying on your couch. You were practically dead Draco. Why did you do that?" Ginny asked.

"My father is coming," Draco said.

Blaise turned around very quickly.

"Is that bad?" Ginny asked.

"Is that bad? How can you ask that?" Blaise asked.

"She doesn't know exactly how evil my father is," Draco told him.

"I know yourf ather is evil Draco. But he can't be too horrible to you, you're his son." Ginny pointed out.

"He doesn't care. He is going to find out that I'm hurting myself again and he is going to be furious. I was hoping I would die yesterday so I wouldn't have to face him. He is going to kill me. I am far too weak now to even try to fight him."

Ginny just sat down beside him and held his hand. She didn't know what to tell him.

* * *

Harry was sitting alone on the floor in the Weasley's small bathroom. He had a knife in his hand. Months ago, he had quit cutting. He had been fine up until now. When he had seen Ginny, cutting with her knife it pulled something inside him. He remembered. He remembered how it felt to slice into his skin.

He wanted to do it again. Right now Harry wanted nothing more than to cut his skin. He wanted to sink that knife deep into his flesh. He knew that he would hate himself for it in the morning, but right now, he didn't care. All Harry wanted to do was feel peaceful again. He knew that his knife would bring him back to that.

He rolled up his sleeve, making a quick decision. He pressed the knife into his flesh. The pain was familiar but different. He watched the blood pouring out of his arm and remembered what it had felt like before. He sighed and put his head against the wall. He just sat and let his arm bleed. Suddenly he realized what he had just done.

He had just ruined everything. All those months that he had spent fighting, all wasted. He had been fighting this battle with himself for too long. He had just thrown away everything he had accomplished within himself. He grabbed his knife off of the floor and threw it at the wall, thankful that he had put a sound spell on the room when he had come in. Harry was so angry with himself. He grabbed his knife and stormed out of the room.

* * *

Draco sat in his room. His father would be arriving any minute.

Ginny and Blaise had tried to convince him to go and tell Dumbledore what was about to happen. But Draco hadn't listened. Dumbledore probably wouldn't believe him anyway, even though he was telling the truth. As far as Albus Dumbledore knew, Draco idolized his father. Draco didn't have any true proof anyway. And if he told someone he would have to be examined, and he was covered in scars and fresh cuts. No, he just had to hope that he would live through the day.

Suddenly Lucius Malfoy walked into the room. He stood staring at his son for a moment. Suddenly Draco knew that he knew. His father knew that he was cutting again. Something in Lucius' eyes told Draco that his father was not happy about it either. Lucius stood silently. He looked huge compared to Draco, who was sitting on his bed. Draco stood up and walked to his father.

"You've fallen into the world of the weak again, haven't you?"

Draco didn't answer.

"Answer me boy!" Lucius shouted raising his hand and smacking Draco hard in the face.

Draco didn't show that he had felt any pain although his cheek was already beginning to bruise.

"If you want to know if I'm harming myself to keep from hurting innocents than the answer is yes, I am."

"Fuck you! You are a disgrace to this family and I cannot allow you to continue doing this!"

Lucius pulled off his expensive, heavy cloak. Draco knew what that meant. His father was making it easier for him to move, easier to physically harm his own son. He put his cane aside for a moment with his coat. Draco knew that he would be using it as well not to long from now.

Lucius walked right up to Draco. He shook his head and smiled an eerie smile. Suddenly, without warning, Lucius shot his fist into Draco's stomach. Draco fell down onto the floor, the wind knocked out of him. He had barely regained his breath when his father kicked him in the head with a steel-toed boot. Draco's head was thrown back. He could see the blood from his head in front of his eyes. He quickly brushed a hand against his face so he could see his father.

Lucius now had his cane in his hand. Draco knew this was bad. His father never used his cane this early on. Draco tried to crawl away from his father. His father stomped down on his foot, straitening his leg. He brought his cane down, breaking his son's leg. Draco yelped in pain. His father was currently ripping the shirt right off his back with his cane. Draco stared in wonder. How could his father rip something with a cane? Draco looked over his shoulder and saw that the cane had a sharpened point on it.

After Lucius had finished ripping off Draco's shirt, he dragged his cane on his back like a knife. Draco's back was probably the only place on his body, besides his head, that didn't have any cuts on it. Draco had never cut his back because he couldn't see it; he liked to be able to see the blood running out of the cut. But right now he wasn't really worried about his father seeing any of his cuts.

Lucius was shredding the skin on his back. Draco's back was much more sensitive than the rest of his body because it had never been cut before. There was no scar tissue, just flesh. Draco cried out in pain. His father had driven the cane over top of an already open wound.

Lucius flipped Draco over and tore the rest of his shirt off. Lucius glared down at the many cuts and scars on Draco's chest and stomach. There were literally hundreds of self-inflicted marks on Draco's body. His father put one large gash on Draco's chest. Then he moved to Draco's arms.

His arms hurt quite a bit when his father started to slash them. There were many cuts on his arms. He had been cutting much more than usual in the last few days before his father came. Draco tried to keep his face looking normal. He didn't want to show his father that he was in pain. Suddenly Lucius stopped.

"I think I will let you live."

It was an odd sentence for a father to say to his son, even for Lucius. With that comment Lucius lifted his cloak and left Draco's room. Draco sat up, not believing what had just happened. He was alive.

Then Draco let himself fall into unconsciousness.

* * *

Ginny sat in her dorm shaking with worry. Draco had told her not to come to his room today. He didn't want her dropping by while his father was around. Ginny assumed that Lucius didn't know that his son had been associating with a Weasley. She also supposed that Draco wanted to keep it that way.

Suddenly Ginny couldn't take it anymore. Did Draco honestly expect her to stay here and wait for him to come to her? What if he was dead? She wouldn't even know it!

Ginny jumped off of her bed and ran out of her dorm. She ran down the circular staircase and into the Common Room. She ignored all of the stares that she got as she ran right through the busy room. Ginny ran down the halls not worrying about making noise. Suddenly Ginny smashed right into someone.

"Miss Weasley, I suggest that you watch where you are going."

"Professor Snape! I'm so sorry!"

"I think you had better come with me now Weasley," Snape said.

"No! Professor I can't! I have to get down to the Slytherin dormitory right away!" Ginny blurted out.

"And way, might I ask, are you needing to go to my house's dormitories?"

"Um…" Ginny might have just blown Draco's chance for living.

"Yes?"

Ginny figured that she might as well tell him some of what was going on. This could mean life or death for Draco right now.

"Draco's father is coming today and he might have killed him by now," she said quickly, leaving out why Lucius might kill him.

"Well, I shall accompany you down there then," Snape said, hiding his worry.

Ginny continued her speed walking down to Draco's room. Finally, when the two of them were standing outside Draco's room, she stopped.

"How did you know the Slytherin password?"

"There is no time for that! Draco could be dead!" Ginny said shouting Draco's password at the portrait.

Ginny and the Potions Master walked quickly into Draco's room to find him lying on the floor.

"He's dead!" Ginny gasped after taking one look at him.

* * *

Hannah walked around inside her empty dormitory. She double-checked to make sure that everything that she owned was packed into her trunk. It was.

Hannah had never thought that she would ever want to leave Hogwarts. Until now. How could Justin have taken his life? How? She didn't understand why he would ever be able to do that to himself. Hannah just could not bare the thought of staying in the building where her best friend, and cousin, had taken his life.

She pulled her broomstick out from under her bed. She placed a spell on her trunk and mounted her broom. She opened the window and flew out into the storm.

* * *

Hermione noticed that Harry had been considerably less happy during the last few days that he usually was. She wanted to ask him what was wrong. She would have, accept, every time she was about to say something to him she couldn't bring herself to do it. She knew that something was very wrong though. Something was so wrong that she didn't think that she even really wanted to know what was going on.

Later that same night Hermione decided to take a shower. She was standing on the bathmat in the washroom when she noticed something odd. Hermione bent down to examine what she was seeing a bit better. Yes, it definitely was blood. There were four drops of blood on the white bathmat in the Weasley's bathroom. They were fresh. Someone had cut themselves inside the room that she was currently standing in.

* * *

Well, hey guys.

Sorry this chapter took so long, I hope that it is worth it! I think it's a bit longer than my chapters usually are, so maybe that will help you all to forgive me.

I am hoping to get the next chapter up sometime soon, but it may be a little while. I used to have the house to myself on Thursday nights, and I used to write then. But now I've found out that I won't be alone in the house at that time anymore. So, just a warning, my updates probably won't come out near as often as they used to.


	14. Chapter 13

AN: Hey guys. You seemed to enjoy the last chapter thumbs up eh?

Well, this chapter may be slightly happier than the last. I was really down over the weekend, when I wrote most of it, and the beginning of this week. However, this week I've really been into my spiritual life. I think I've gotten even closer to God than I was before. Someone on fictionpress basically told me that there was no God and that no one is going to give a damn when I die. I pretty much told him thank you for trying to bring me away from my faith and to apologize for that fact that he failed and that he may have brought me even closer to God by trying to break my faith. J My faith has also possibly been an inspiration for a new fanfic. crosses fingers we'll see if I ever post it…

Anyway:

?Noone? : I like bubblesJ. Lucius does say fuck you…in my world. I was just being weird when I updated, I was tired of my boring titles. More fic coming up.

RubyFoxburrofLoamsdown : Yes, I would like to kill Lucius too. For now I guess he should stay alive. How can we hurt him if he's dead? You haven't cut in three weeks? That is important! Good for you! I nearly cut on Monday night. I had a blade in my hand and then I looked at my bible on the side of my bed and stopped. I haven't cut for 32 days, that's…four weeks and four days. I think. Anyway, thanks for the review J

Cinnamon Angel: I take it you liked the chapter? Yeah, I don't really know where all that came from, probably my own obsession with blood. Yes, Ginny bothered me a bit in the last chapter, but I wasn't really sure what she should do, so I made her helpless. I was writing the whole Harry thing, not knowing where it was going, and then realized that I was going to trigger someone, got mad, and made him throw his knife across the room. Yes, Snape enters the scene, haven't decided what I'm going to do with him yet…I just had to throw another character in there. There wasn't enough going on for my liking so I'm throwing in a bunch of other stuff to fill up the empty spots (Harry, Hannah and now some Hermione). You wouldn't kill me. You'd never get to read the rest of the fic J. Sorry I couldn't meet you online on Monday. I don't get home from school til 4 and I'm not home on Mondays anyway. Anyway, this is very long for a response thing, so I should go. I hope to talk to you soon. J. By the way, I notice you don't seem to upset about the fact that Draco might be dead, I spose you trust me with his life eh?

Kneh13 : Yes, I think that Draco will be very hurt because of that. But, Snape is there now. It will all be fine thumbs up

MiOnEGrAnGeR741 : Not everyone cuts themselves, but a lot of people do. A lot of people cut themselves a lot worse that I EVER did. I am 14 years old. Yes, I do realize that this fic is very dark. But I think that writing this and getting my feelings out through writing this fic is probably better for me than killing myself, you be the judge. Everyone has different reasons for cutting themselves, I had mine. I've quit cutting myself now, and it has been the hardest thing that I have ever done. Yes, this fic is dark, and right now it does appear to be going nowhere, but it will definitely end with Draco and Ginny NOT cutting. They will eventually quit, Draco has already tried. I can handle myself thank you. I have no intention of going to a therapist. If I did seek professional help I would probably end up lying to them anyway because I have some major trust issues. I'm sorry you feel this way about my fic. If you don't like it I suggest you don't read it. And, I 'spose, if you really have a problem with it, you could report me.

Sandwichbitch: great to hear from you again. Sorry to hear that you don't like what I'm doing with Hermione. I'm not really sure where I'm going with her right now. I have a feeling that she is definitely going to play a part in this though. I don't really know what I'm going to do with Hannah. You should probably find out soon after I do. J

CrashCart: Yeah, it is a horrible addiction. I dunno, maybe if you find it triggering than you shouldn't read it. Not that I'm trying to chase you away. I'm just saying, I don't want to be responsible for you cutting.

dYiNgdEsTiNy – glad to see you are enjoying the fic. Sorry this update took so long, I haven't been writing lately, due to some personal crap.

KaylaSummers – Hello. Hopefully this will feed your craving!

Happy-little-hobbit – Hello my faithful reviewer. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

Sadie – I'm glad that this story is helping you. Cutters seem to be helped by this story, while a lot of the non-cutters reading this seem to either think that I should stop writing because I might trigger someone, or that I automatically need mental help. But anyway, I'm glad that you are enjoying this story. If you ever want to e-mail me I'm at:

* * *

CHAPTER 13

Ginny ran across the room to Draco. Snape hurried along behind her. He bent down and checked his pulse.

"He's alive, but barely," Snape said, "We'll need to get him to Madam Pomfrey."

"No!"

"What? He needs medical attention immediately!"

"Yes, but can't you fix him? I don't think that too many people should know about this," Ginny explained.

"Yes, I suppose you're right for once in your life," Snape said, knowing it was true and hating to admit it.

Snape bent down and started to heal Draco's wounds. This boy had lost a lot of blood. More blood than Severus would have thought possible, even considering his wounds. A lot of his wounds seemed to be broken bones which Severus healed quickly. Everything on Draco seemed to be bleeding. How could there be that much blood? He was just covered in it. Suddenly Snape came across something odd on Draco's leg.

"Hmm, that's odd."

"What?" Ginny said, worried.

"There is a wound on Draco's leg that I can't seem to heal," Severus explained.

"Oh, um, is it bleeding?" Ginny asked, trying to cover for Draco's self-injury.

"No, I guess I can leave it for now."

Severus went back to healing Draco wounds. He hoped that he was doing it right. He had never really had much training in medicine. He had taken healing twice while he was at Hogwarts. He never thought that he would need healing skills, especially for something so severe.

Suddenly Ginny realized she was being stupid. Draco was lying on the floor dying, and she was standing and watching. She could help with this. She had never had any training in healing, but she was well aware of how to heal cuts and things. She bent down at Draco's side and lifted his arm. Ginny noticed a group of cuts on his wrists. She healed some of the cuts on his arm, but most of them wouldn't heal.

Snape healed Draco's injuries, all along watching Ginny. He wondered how she had gotten so good at healing. She was better at it than him, she was faster. She had never taken any medical courses, as far as he knew. He put it out of his mind for now; he would ask her about it later.

* * *

Hermione examined the blood on the carpet in the bathroom. Someone had probably accidentally cut themselves shaving or something. She decided that it hadn't been someone deliberately cutting themselves. No one that she knew would do that.

She put the fact that the blood was fresh out of her mind. She didn't want to think about the fact that people didn't shave at this time of day. She tried to forget about the blood on the mat but it just wouldn't leave her mind.

* * *

Harry lay down on his bed in Ron's room. The door was locked. Everyone thought that he was outside flying on his broom. He had probably twenty minutes before anyone realized that he wasn't outside.

He looked at his knife. What difference would it make if he cut again? He had already done the dirty deed once. Would it really matter if he did it again? What was so bad about cutting anyway? Why had he stopped in the first place?

But no, then he realized that what he was thinking was wrong. Cutting was wrong. There was no excuse for it. He didn't need his knife anymore. It hadn't fixed anything then, and it wouldn't fix anything now. Harry pointed his wand at his knife and said the words to make it disappear.

* * *

Hours later Ginny and Severus sat in Draco's dorm waiting for him to wake up. He was still alive, but it had been close. Ginny had never been so worried about someone in her life. Suddenly Severus stood up.

"I have to go!" He said.

"Why?"

"I don't think I need to tell you before I do everything Miss Weasley. But please, do stay here with Draco then." And with that he got up and left. Ginny was alone in the room with Draco.

Ginny held Draco's hand, watching him silently. She brushed his hair off his face and leaned back in her chair. It had been a very long day. It didn't take long for Ginny to drift off to sleep.

Draco slowly opened his eyes. Was he dead? He should be…No, he wasn't. Why wasn't he dead? He looked around and saw Ginny sitting beside him. He smiled. She had been sitting with him all this time. She appeared to be sleeping. She must be exhausted if she had healed him.

Suddenly she stirred. She looked at him and gasped.

"Oh! I'm sorry! I wanted to be awake when you woke up, but I guess I fell asleep," she said.

"It's ok. You didn't have to stay."

"I thought you were dead when we came in."

"We? Who was with you?" Draco asked, worried.

"Professor Snape. I hope he wasn't too surprised with my healing skills."

"Snape? He helped you? He must finally know what's going on with my father then."

"I guess. How are you feeling?"

"Better than I normally feel after a beating."

"This happens regularly?"

"Yeah, but never this bad."

"You should rest," Ginny said.

"No, I've been in bed too long, I need to get out of here before people realize that I've been in here for two days. People will start to suspect things."

"But-"

"No buts, help me get dressed."

Ginny helped Draco out of bed and helped him get a clean shirt and fresh robes on. Looking at him now no one would know of all of the scars and self-inflicted cuts that were on his pale skin under his clothes. Draco quickly brushed his hair, although it wasn't the least bit messy and walked to the door.

"Let's go for a walk," he said.

Ginny followed him out of his room. As they walked down the corridors they were getting their usual glares and strange looks when suddenly a 7th year Hufflepuff student walked up to them. Draco stood up straight, ready to fight if need be. But the Hufflepuff student didn't appear to want to fight.

"I just want to let you guys know that I really dig this whole interchanging of the houses thing. I wish other people could see that ones house really doesn't mean anything because we are all wizards and witches on the inside anyway." And with that the boy walked away.

"That's a first," Ginny said.

"There's one for everything," Draco said.

* * *

Hannah looked around her. Where was she? The last thing she remembered was flying around in the middle of a storm not knowing where she was going. Now she appeared to be in a dungeon. Her broom and her luggage were nowhere that she could see.

Suddenly the door opened and a horrible-looking creature walked in. She knew that it must be Voldemort because he was so foul-looking. She watched him as he silently shut the door and walked over to stand in front of her.

"Hannah," he said.

"What do you want? Where am I?"

"Well, I can't really explain where you are, and I can't explain why, but I can tell you what you will be doing. We have something very important that you will be helping us with. Until then I will be giving you to my most faithful servant. You will be Lucius' slave until you are needed. You will do everything that he asks you too, no matter how horrible it seems at the time. You may be rewarded in the end."

* * *

Hermione loved to read. Right now she was reading one of the many books in Ginny's room. It was a book about self mutilation. She wasn't really sure why Ginny had this book, but she didn't really care. The book was very interesting. It talked about the pros and cons of cutting.

Hermione noticed that there were some marks and things on a lot of the pages. Ginny had circled some things. One thing was circled with an arrow pointing to it. Beside the arrow it said "try this".

Hermione was now wondering. Did Ginny cut herself? Although it wasn't exactly her character Hermione started to look around for something that might show her if Ginny was a cutter or not. She lifted Ginny's mattress and, to her relief, found no knives under it. If Ginny were harming herself certainly she would need something to do it with.

Hermione was looking around under Ginny's bed when she found a dusty box. The box was labeled "do not open" so of course she did. Hermione opened the box and found it to be full of what appeared to be finished journals.

She opened one of them and flipped to a random page.

_April 18th_

_Fred found out that I've been cutting again. He is furious and has threatened to take all of my knives away. I know that he is smart enough not to do that, but what if he tells mum and dad? I would be so embarrassed if anyone else found out._

_I love to cut. I don't know what I would do without it. But sometimes I wonder why I started. It really is a horrible thing. I think that it's pleasures are all in my head. How can causing myself pain really help me to get rid of my problems? It just doesn't make sense to me._

_-Ginny _

Hermione gasped and dropped the book. Ginny Weasley was a cutter.

* * *

AN: sorry about the delay in chapters. I cut myself again. I went 37 days without cutting myself and then I just went and did it. I was furious with myself at first, and I'm still mad, but now I am going to try and go longer. It has been 10 days so far since I last cut. J

I hope that you guys enjoy this chapter and I am sorry that it has taken me this long to produce it.

* * *

2008 (note during editing)

It's weird...You would never think that you could look down at an author's note like that one and smile...but I am. It's been over 4 years since I cut last...the time that I spoke of in this chapter was the last time. It's hard to believe that at 14 I had the strength to get through all that...If I started again now, I don't know that I could ever stop.


	15. Chapter 14

AN: I hope that this chapter doesn't come out too angry. I'm in a very angry mood right now, I don't really know why. Everything just makes me mad. People around me are whining about all of these little things, complaining about everything. There is so much horrible stuff going on in the world, and all people are doing are whining about is how they didn't get asked to some dance, or their pants don't match their shoes, or they haven't seen their two-week boyfriend in 5 and a half hours….

I guess I should dump all of those review responses at the bottom, they are becoming too many.

CHAPTER 14

Hermione couldn't believe this. She knew that Ginny had some problems, but this? This was ridiculous! She stood up to leave the room and tell Mrs. Weasley or Ron about all of this. But before she left the room, she stopped. This wasn't really any of her business and she had no right to tell Ginny's family about it.

Hermione would have to confront Ginny about this eventually, but for now she just wanted to find out as much about it as possible.

Hermione lifted all of the journals out of the box to see if there was anything else in it. There were eight journals in the box, dating back to 5 years before. Hermione peered into the box. There didn't appear to be anything else in it. But then she noticed that the bottom seemed to be raised a bit, the box looked unpreportioned. Hermione stuck her finger down the side of the bottom of the box and lifted it up.

As she pulled the false bottom out of the box she was scared of what she knew she was about to find. In the bottom of the box there was a large knife. She wondered why Ginny didn't have her knife with her at the school. Perhaps she had more than one.

But it wasn't the knife that disturbed Hermione. There were a couple of Muggle photographs in the bottom of the box. Hermione lifted them out and stifled a scream. They were pictures of various body parts, all dripping with blood. There was a picture of Ginny wearing a bra and underwear. She was covered in scars and cuts.

Hermione pushed all of the pictures, the knife and all eight of the journals back into the box. She shoved the box under Ginny's bed and ran from the room.

* * *

Ginny and Draco were walking back towards the Slytherin Dungeons. Suddenly a student walked past them and shoved into Draco. The student walked away laughing but Draco grabbed his arm in pain. There was a look of intense pain on Draco's face. Ginny turned to him and gasped when she saw blood seeping out of the sleeve of his robe.

Without speaking they both started walking faster to Draco's dorm room. Once they got into his room Draco thumped down onto the couch and let out a horrible moan. Ginny knew the pain must be pretty bad if he was making noise and showing it. Draco Malfoy was tough and he wanted people to know it.

Ginny went and sat next to him on the couch. She rolled up his sleeve and flinched at what she saw. Draco's arm was covered in blood. She wondered how he could have lost so much blood in so little time. She needed to do something about it quick. Draco had already lost quite enough blood in the last 24 hours and he couldn't afford to lose this too. Ginny pulled out her wand to heal his arm, but Draco stopped her.

"You can't heal it."

"What? Why not?"

"Because all of the things I did on my arm were done with my blade, so you can't heal it."

"Draco, you're going to die from blood loss."

* * *

Harry walked down the narrow staircase in the Burrow. He was thankful for the railing at that moment. He had never been so shaky in his life. He was having second thoughts now. Right now he really wanted his knife, and he couldn't have it.

He knew that banishing it had been the right thing to do, but that didn't mean that he had to like it. And he didn't.

He walked into the Weasley's kitchen and sat down at the packed table for dinner. He didn't seem to be the only one who was a bit shaken up though. Hermione looked as if she had seen a ghost.

Harry ate his meal without speaking. He didn't notice the tall redhead watching him throughout the whole meal.

* * *

Ron looked from Harry to Hermione. What was going on with them? They both looked half-dead and Ron wanted to know why. They must have seen something in the house to spook them so much. Ron felt left out. Harry, Hermione and him did everything together. But today Hermione and Harry had decided to leave him out of their fun.

Ron would find out what was going on soon enough.

* * *

Ginny and Draco sat in silence eating their supper. Draco had bandaged his arm up to the best of his abilities. Ginny wished that he could go and see Madam Pomfrey, but he could never do that.

Draco was deep in thought at the moment. He was thinking about cutting and how stupid it was to do. In the end it just made things worse in his life. If it weren't for his cutting Draco wouldn't have been beaten by his father the night before.

If it weren't for his cutting his arm wouldn't be throbbing right now. If it weren't for his cutting many things would be different. Draco knew that cutting himself was basically ruining his life. He knew that it had to stop.

Draco stood up from the table and ran back to his room. He knew what he needed to do.

Ginny was deep in thought. She turned to look at Draco because she wanted to ask him something. He was gone. She stood up and started looking around the Great Hall. He definitely wasn't in the room.

Suddenly something caught her eye. She turned and looked up at the staff table. Professor Dumbledore was watching her. He winked when he saw that she was looking at him. She stood up from the table and started to walk towards Draco's room. She hoped he hadn't done anything stupid.

Draco watched the fire burning in his room. Fire was almost as interesting as blood to him. He wondered why he had never lit the fire in his room before. He knew why. He had never had a reason to light it before.

Draco walked over to his dresser and lifted his knife. The reflection of the flames danced on his blade. Draco walked back across the room and without a thought tossed the knife into the fire.

Ginny burst into the room out of breath and came to stand beside him. She didn't really know what he was doing so she just stood beside him. She looked into the fire. It really was fascinating. She had barely even noticed the fireplace in Draco's room before now. He had never had a fire in it before.

Draco was staring deep into the heart of the fire. Ginny slipped her hand into his. He looked startled and turned to her.

"I didn't hear you come in," he said.

"What are you doing?"

"I just burnt my knife,"

"Are you having second thoughts?"

"Hell yes," he said.

"You can still get it out."

"No, I can't, this isn't your average fire. Wizarding fire can be made to burn anything," he explained sadly.

"You just gave up hurting yourself."

Draco just looked at her sadly.

"Let's go back to dinner," he said, leading her out of the room.

Ginny watched Draco as they were walking down the hall. His face was void of emotion, but she knew it was there. He had just made the biggest choice he ever had. He had just quit cutting. Ginny thought about quitting herself for a moment and knew that she wasn't ready. Someday she would go without her knife, but this wasn't it.

As they walked back into the Great Hall Ginny looked up at the staff table again. Professor Dumbledore was smiling at her again. Ginny had a feeling that Dumbledore knew about everything that went on in the school, all of the time.

* * *

Hermione was walking around outside the Burrow. After supper she had just needed to get out. She walked around the property; she had never known there was so much. Although the Weasley's didn't have much money, their property was very large. There was a bit of a forest in the back and a pond within the forest.

Hermione stopped when she got to the pond. She slipped her bare feet into the water. She was running her feet along the mossy bottom when suddenly she felt a sharp pain in the water. She pulled her foot out of the water to see the damage. There was a deep cut along the bottom of her foot. She wrapped her sock around her foot to try to stop the bleeding. She reached her hand into the water to see what had cut her.

Her hand came across something sharp in the water. She pulled it out of the water. It appeared to be the blade out of a razor. It would seem that Ginny came out here to cut sometimes. This whole situation was a bit more serious than Hermione had originally thought.

* * *

Harry was walking outside with his broom. He needed to blow off some steam. He was hoping that a little flying would help. He was about to mount his broom when he heard footsteps approaching him from behind. He turned and saw Ron walking towards him.

"Hey, Ron, want to go for a quick broom ride?" Harry said, trying to be normal.

"Don't give me that bullshit; I want to know what's going on."

"What? Nothing's going on." Harry said, a little worried.

"I know something's going on with you and Hermione and I want to know what it is."

Harry just stared at Ron in wonder. How would he answer that?

Hermione was back in Ginny's room. She hated to do it, but she felt that she needed to read a bit more out of Ginny's journal. She pulled out the most recent one. She figured it was some sort of magical journal that Ginny was writing in from the school, the last entry was from that same night.

_Wow, I'm at a loss for words right now. I am so proud of Draco. He burnt his knife today. I wish I could have as much courage as him. I would love to be able to burn my knife. I am so tired of all of the shit that goes with self-injury. _

_I'm tired of having to hide my arms. I'm sad that I can't wear skirts or shorts. It's depressing how good I am at healing and glamour charms. I wish I could quit. Hurting myself does absolutely nothing for me. In the end it makes things worse than they were to start off._

_-Ginny_

Hermione felt sad for Ginny while she was reading that. A huge splotch of blood appeared at the bottom of the page. Ginny was cutting herself right now.

* * *

Ginny pushed her knife down into her arm. How could Draco be so strong? She admired him so much for what he had done. Ginny watched the blood dripping down her arm, staining her sheets once again. She had thought she had seen enough blood for the day. But, she was wrong; she was always up for more blood. She pressed her knife into her shoulder. Blood came out of her shoulder and poured all the way down to her fingers.

The knife slid out of her hand when she was about to cut herself again. The sharp end hit her leg, leaving a hole in her robes. The knife tumbled to the floor with a thump and Ginny was breathless with the thought of what she had almost done. She had been about to slash the knife into her wrist with great force. She had never gone towards her arm that fast before. It was a good thing she had lost her grip.

Ginny lay back onto her bed and fell into an uneasy sleep.

* * *

The next day Draco walked over to the Gryffindor dormitories with a light mind. He couldn't remember the last time he had felt quite like this. The first time he had cut he had only been 7 years old. He guessed that the last time he had felt this good was around then.

He used to think that cutting made him feel good. But, now that he had quit, he realized that it was just bringing him down, something holding him back. As he burnt his knife it had felt like a part of him was because pulled away from him. He had struggled to hold on to it, but he hadn't been strong enough.

But now that he had been released from his bond with his knife he felt so much more free. That knife had always been a part of him. A constant presence in his mind. But now it was gone. He felt empty; there was nothing inside him but him. He loved the feeling.

Ginny stepped out of the portrait hole, breaking his thoughts.

"You look happy this morning," she told him.

"I just hope that this lasts," he said.

* * *

Mrs. Weasley looked outside the window; Ron seemed to be yelling at Harry. She opened the door and yelled for him to come inside. She wouldn't have them fighting at Christmas.

"Ron! Get in here and help me with the dishes!"

Ron glared at Harry, "I'm not done yet," he said, and ran into the house.

Harry sighed a sigh of relief. Ron hadn't waited for him to answer his question. He had just barged right in saying that he knew Harry and Hermione were up to something and he would find out what it was. He apparently didn't like to be left out of things, even though nothing was really going on…

* * *

Ginny sat on the couch with Draco. This was the first time she had ever had Christmas without someone in her family. She had received various gifts from her family. She had received some books on healing from Hermione and some quidditch things from most of her brothers. She had received some interesting shoes from Charlie which she suspected to be a very expensive dragon hide.

She had a bought a ring for Draco. She hoped that he liked it. She had noticed a few weeks before that he had stopped wearing the ugly ring that his father had given him.

Draco opened the small gift from Ginny. It was a silver dragon curled around a green stone.

"Very Slytherin, I love it," he said, giving her a kiss.

"I'm so glad that you like it, you are very hard to buy for. What I can I buy someone who is rich enough to buy this building?"

"Well, I like it anyway, here, open my gift."

Draco remembered Ginny telling him a while back that she had no jewelry that she liked. He had splurged and bought everything that he had seen in the store that he thought she might like.

"Why so much?" Ginny asked when he handed her a bunch of boxes.

"I couldn't help myself," he said simply.

The first box that she opened was a necklace. It was a silver knife on a silver chain. She gasped when she looked at it. It was so small, but when one looked at it she could see that it had the same designs on it as her knife. The handle of the knife was decorated with small red stones where the roses on her knife were. It was amazing.

"Wow, this is the most beautiful piece of jewelry I have ever seen, let alone owned."

Ginny opened the other boxes that he had dumped in her lap. It was all very expensive jewelry. She opened a box with a necklace in it that had a dragon similar to the one on Draco's ring. She also opened a pair of earrings. They weren't the same thing but they matched each other anyway. One of them was a small knife and the other a dragon.

"Draco, these are all amazing. I can't believe you bought all of this."

"Well, I did, I'm glad you like them. Now, since I'm in a good mood, why don't you let me take you out for a fancy, muggle, Christmas dinner?"

"Well, nice as that is, you know I don't have anything to wear."

"What, you think I would buy all of that jewelry for you and not get you something to wear with it all?"

Draco walked over to his wardrobe and pulled out a hanger with a beautiful dress on it.

"That's for me?" Ginny asked feeling the soft, red material.

"Just for you."

"Well, in that case, I guess we had better go out for dinner."

Ginny came out of Draco's washroom 20 minutes later. She was wearing the dress and some of the jewelry he had given her. It had only taken her about 5 minutes to get dressed. The other 15 minutes she had been applying glamour charms to her arms and legs to hide all of the cuts and scars that were on her body.

When Draco saw her the first thing he said with a surprised look, "Wow, no cuts,"

"I'm quite talented with glamour charms," she said with a laugh.

"Well, you look beautiful."

Ginny and Draco had a lovely evening. They didn't realize how long they had been out for until Ginny's glamour charm started to wear off. She and Draco were having a conversation that was completely unrelated to self-injury when suddenly the woman beside he turned to her and gasped.

Ginny looked at her arm and her head came up very pale.

"Uh oh," she said.

People in the room started to look over at her and whisper things. Draco called the waiter over to bring them the cheque. He took off his suit jacket and gave it to Ginny to wear. As they left the restaurant Ginny began to cry.

"I am so tired of all of this shit. I wish I had never started cutting, it's ruining my life."

"Why do you think I quit?"

* * *

Harry was in the Hogwarts Express. He didn't remember ever having a Christmas holiday that went by that quickly. He was sitting with Ron and Hermione as usual. The only difference was that the compartment was completely silent. Ron was sitting in his seat glaring out the window. The only reason he wasn't yelling at Harry was the fact that Hermione was sleeping and he didn't want to disturb her.

Harry fiddled with his fingers. He should not have cut himself last week. He had been fine for all those months. And now it was like quitting all over again. He was going through that horrible withdrawal period. He remembered feeling like this very clearly. His mind was always wandering and always returning to thoughts about cutting. He wished that he still had his knife. If he had it with him he would probably be cutting right now. Maybe it was best that he didn't have it with him.

Suddenly Hermione stirred and was awake.

"Finally you're up, we three need to talk," Ron said with a strange smile.

* * *

Ginny was so embarrassed. It had happened nearly a week ago. She still couldn't believe that she was so careless with her charms. Charms was her best subject and she couldn't even keep a simple glamour charm up long enough to eat a meal.

After she and Draco had come home from the restaurant she had gone upstairs and cut her arms again. She was thankful that her dress was red.

Right now she was in a large amount of pain. In the last week she had cut herself almost every moment that she was alone. She even cut sometimes when she was in Draco's bathroom or while he was in the bathroom. She ended up having to heal some of the cuts, something that she hadn't done in a while. Her arms and legs were so covered that she had no room to cut anymore. She healed all of the cuts on her left arm so that she could have fresh space to cut on.

Draco watched sadly as Ginny excused herself to the bathroom for the second time in the last hour. He knew that she was cutting more than usual. He shouldn't have taken her out for dinner. When he had bought that dress he hadn't been thinking about all of her cuts and scars. He had simply been thinking about how beautiful she would look in it and how much she would like it.

He thought that he would have needed to cut this week, but right now he really didn't. He thought that he would crave his blade like he had every other time he had 'quit'. But this time was different, his knife was gone. Since the knife was gone he wasn't bonded to it anymore, he didn't need to hurt people with it. He didn't need to hurt himself anymore. Did he want too? Hell yes. He still wanted to hurt himself, because he was so used to doing it, it was like a routine. He had liked the way it felt to cut. He missed the pain and he missed the blood. But when he thought about doing it, he really didn't need too. Why would he cut anyway? What can truly be so horrible that it causes a person to hurt themselves? He had done it, so he should be able to answer that, but he couldn't. The reason that he couldn't was because cutting was useless. At the end of the day he was still going to be Draco. Still hurting.

* * *

AN: Well, I hope you guys like this chapter, I don't. I found this chapter to be fairly uneventful, except for Draco's knife ending up in the fire…You know. Anyway, some of you requested longer chapters, I think this is a bit longer than usual eh?

So far it's been 21 days since I cut. But the date is currently April 19, there is something coming up that could mess up a lot of things for a lot of people, in my life. I just hope it doesn't happen…

Reviewer Response time:

RubyFoxburrofLoamsdown: Yeah, I cut myself again. At first I was furious, which did the opposite to me, it made me really not want to cut for a while. For me it's been 21 days since I cut. My aim, I think, is May 5th, which will be the 38-day mark for me. I don't think that this story promotes cutting either. But, some people seem to think that it does. Whatever, I'm still going to keep writing until it is taken down from the site. That's the only thing that will stop me.

CinnamonAngel: Hello, I'm sorry that I just wrote a rant as a review to your poem. I probably shouldn't have. :S. I figured it was about time we got some sort of 'bad guy' besides Lucius in the picture. I'm a bit fed up with him right now. Draco should be alright. It depends on my mood I guess…

Bleedingpuppet: No, in the end cutting just messes things up worse than they were in the first place. I didn't realize that my story switched back and forth like that. Oh well, I can't really change that much, that's just how I write. I hope you enjoy this chapterJ.

FroZenInTiMe: I've burnt myself once, but I didn't really like it. I've tried bruising myself too, but I like cutting the best. I think I like that blood just as much, if not more, than the pain, so maybe that's why I like cutting. I also like having scars, marks, and things on me, I like that way it looks…Anyway, I'm glad you're liking the story so far. I hope you like the rest.

Jewess84: Wow, 42 days! I can't wait until I get that far. Congrats! Right now I am aiming for 38 days, then I'll see from there.

?Noone?: Hello. Not really sure how to go about answering your review, but I shall anyway. I like blood personally, but not Draco's if that's what you meant. I also like scars, sometimes. Sometimes I like my scars, sometimes I hate them.

Crashcart9: Yup, so far for me it's been 21 days, I can't wait for that number to grow. I reviewed your story! It seems good so far, I can't wait for you to update so I can read more of it. I'm not going to kill myself, so this story should definitely be finished.

SandwichBitch: Hermione is very sneaky, snooping around and such. I'm back in the war, it's been 20 days so far and the number keeps growing. J

KaylaSummers: glad you enjoyed it. J Snape will most definitely be making an appearance again. Possibly something to do with Hannah…Harry, I can't tell you that at the moment. Hannah, well, she might have some troubles ahead of her. And Hermione? I can't really tell you what she's going to do, because even I don't know yet. I'll try to make this chapter longer.

Kneh13: Glad you're liking it. Sorry that my updates don't come up quite as much as they used to, I've lost my writing day. I used to write on Thursday nights because no one was home, but now they're home on Thursdays so I can't. L

Well, that took a long time, lol. I love it. Write more reviews! Give me things to incorporate into my story. Every time I read a review something appears in my head to use in this story. It took longer to answer the reviews today; I started replying to them 2 days ago.

Please, just smack that little review button and write me a quick message about what you think of the story so far.


	16. Chapter 15

AN: Well, here it is, another chapter. I guess I should say some stuff before you start reading. A couple of you inquired as to why Ginny was cutting so much. First off, I'm sorry about that. Part of the reason that she is cutting a lot is because I really want to hurt myself right now. These last few weeks have probably been the hardest of my life. I think I might be finally getting through it. I know that I've gone longer before without SIing, but this time it feels different. It's been 23 days so far. Anyway, that partly answers why she has been cutting herself. Well, I guess that's pretty much it.\

Also, I want to get a bit more into the minds of Draco and Ginny. I started this story out more based on them and then it started to branch out into a bunch of other plots as well. This chapter will probably be more focused on them.

Also, there will probably be some more Snape appearances in the next few chapters.

* * *

CHAPTER 15

"Miss Weasley, have you heard anything that I just said?" Professor Snape awoke Ginny from her nap during Potions.

"I'm sorry Professor; it seems that I dozed off. I haven't been sleeping much these last couple of weeks." Ginny tried to explain.

"I don't want to hear about your personal life. Ten points from Gryffindor and please see me after class."

It seemed as if things were back to normal. Snape acted as if nothing had happened with Draco at all. It was the first class after Christmas holidays. Ginny's classmates were basically ignoring her as usual. The few friends that she had had at the beginning of the year didn't really talk to her anymore, not since she had started this whole thing with Draco.

She had noticed tension between Harry, Hermione and Ron though. Ron didn't seem to be talking to Harry and Hermione all that much. Harry was just acting strange in general. He wasn't talking much and always seemed to be looking down and trying to avoid people's gazes. Oddly enough Hermione hadn't said a word to Ginny since they had come back the previous week. She seemed to be avoiding her. Every time Ginny entered a room that Hermione was in she seemed to make excuses to leave. One thing that Ginny had noticed was that when Hermione was in the same room she seemed to be watching Ginny. Ginny had no clue why they were all acting so strange and she didn't really feel like asking them about it.

She hadn't seen Draco much in the last few days. She figured that the fact that he had given up hurting himself and she still did it was putting a bit of a wall between the two of them. She wanted to give it up as well, but she didn't think that she was ready. She wasn't as strong as he was.

There were some other problems around the school as well. Hannah Abbot had disappeared over the Christmas holidays. Nobody really knew where she had gone. It seemed that she had left of her own free will because all of her belongings, including her broom, were gone as well. Dumbledore had contacted her parents but they didn't know where she was either. They were all still pretty worked up about Justin's death.

After class everyone but Ginny left for lunch. Ginny packed her notebook and textbooks into her bag and walked to the front of the room. She stopped at Professor Snape's desk and waited for him to tell her her punishment.

"Well, Miss Weasley. It would seem that you are quite talented in the healing arts," he stated.

Ginny blushed, "I have six older brothers, I've watched my mum a lot," she lied.

"Yes, well, since you were misbehaving in class I am going to give you detention. But it will be detention that is actually useful. I hear that Madam Pomfrey has been overloaded with injuries in the last few months, so you will be helping her in the Hospital Wing for the next few weeks."

"Yes Sir," Ginny wasn't really sure how she felt about this. It would probably help her to get her mind off of other things. It would also most likely reduce the amount of times she cut in a day because she wouldn't have as much spare time. Yes, it would be good for her.

When she walked out of Snape's classroom, still thinking about her detentions, she saw that Draco was waiting outside the door.

"Hello," he said.

"Hey, long time no see," she laughed.

"I haven't seen you too much, is everything alright?"

He knew that she was avoiding him. Part of the reason that she had been avoiding him was because she didn't want him to know that she was cutting so much. She knew that he would be upset if he saw her arms right now. She hadn't cut yet today so she was pretty happy about that.

"I'm fine," she lied again.

"Well, if you're sure."

"I'm sure. How are you?"

"I'm pretty good. I wouldn't mind cutting myself right now, but I won't. I don't think that I will start up again."

Ginny felt a strange feeling come over her. She realized that she almost wished that Draco would start cutting again. She felt weak for still doing it. He had gone through a lot worse things than she had, yet he was still strong enough to quit. Ginny was still harming herself. Ginny was upset about feeling all of this, which brought upon her the urge to cut. That was when she realized that she really needed to quit cutting. When cutting begins to frustrate her so much that she wants to cut, then she had a problem.

"Are you sure everything's ok? Draco asked.

"I think I need to quit cutting."

"Are you ready for that?"

"No, but I think I need to anyway. I run my life, not my blade."

* * *

Draco was sitting in the library later that night studying when he saw Hermione come in. She made eye contact with him and motioned for him to follow her. He picked up his books and followed her down the hall outside the library from a distance. Why was she being so secretive? Was something wrong?

He followed her all the way to a girl's toilet. He knew that no one used this bathroom; it was supposedly haunted by a very annoying ghost.

"What's going on?" He asked Hermione.

"I don't know what to do, I just need to get this out and talk to someone about it. I don't know you that well, and I know you don't like me much, but I figure that if it was about Ginny than you would be willing to talk to me."

"What? What's wrong with Ginny? Is she ok?"

"No, she's not."

"What's wrong?" Draco said, worried.

"She cuts herself."

"Oh, I knew that." He said with a sigh.

"You knew?"

"Well, why else do you think that we became friends? We had something in common."

"You cut too? I thought that was just a rumour that Ron started about you!"

"Does this look like a rumour to you?" He pulled up his sleeve and Hermione flinched, "Sorry, I shouldn't have done that. But anyway, no, I don't cut anymore, but I knew that Ginny did. Besides, the proper term is self harm."

"Whatever. So you knew that Ginny was doing this to herself all this time and you never said anything to anyone?"

"Why would I? It isn't anybody's business that she hurts herself."

"It is so! She could kill herself."

"Not likely, she's not suicidal. She just cuts herself."

"It's the same thing!"

"No, it isn't. Stop being ignorant, you're smarter than this Granger."

"I'm not being ignorant; I'm just trying to talk about someone I care about. I thought you cared about her too."

"I do, I'm just not going to force her to quit cutting. Just because I've quit doesn't mean that she has too. Don't try to make her quit, it will make it worse. We like to make our own decisions. I don't know about you, but if someone tells me not to do something than I am more likely to do it."

"I guess. I just wish there was something I could do," Hermione said.

"Just be her friend. Act normal, nothing's changed. She's been doing this for years and nobody ever really noticed before me, except for Fred, but that's not my business to talk about, so it can't be that big a deal."

"I just don't understand why someone would want to hurt themselves."

"Its quite hard to explain, unless of course you do it, then it all makes sense. My only suggestion is: don't start, it's the hardest thing to stop that I have ever experienced." Draco probably could've explained it better, but he really didn't feel like talking about it with Granger. It wasn't really her business what went on in Ginny's or his life anyway.

"Do you honestly think that I would ever start? Does that seem like something I would do? I'm not really that type!"

"I wouldn't know. There is no _type_ of person who cuts."

"Well, thanks for talking to me. I have to go." And with that she rushed out of the room.

Draco sighed and sat down on the floor. Hermione wasn't the only one who was worried about Ginny. He had been quite worried about her for the last few weeks. She was cutting herself way more than she needed to be and he needed to do something about it.

* * *

Ginny walked into the Hospital Wing. She didn't mind having to do this job. She just didn't really like having to work with Madam Pomfrey. She didn't really like the woman much. She should never have taken Draco's knife away from him. But right now, that wasn't really important.

"Miss Weasley? Is that you?"

"Yes Madam."

"Well, Professor Snape has informed me that you seem to have some medical training. As a form of detention he has you working in here with me, so lets get started."

Ginny followed Madam Pomfrey around the whole wing, learning where things were and being told what she would be expected to do. Madam Pomfrey taught Ginny a number of spells, most of which she already knew.

Ginny sat behind a desk filling out some paper work. Before she knew it, her first patient had arrived.

* * *

Harry was flying around on the Quidditch pitch that same afternoon. He was in a strange mood. He felt numb. Void of emotion. He really wasn't feeling anything, and he didn't understand it. He had been flying around for hours, hoping it would help, but it wasn't.

Ever since he had banished his knife he had been in a zombie-like state. He was awake, but felt as if he was sleeping on his feet all of the time. He was so deep in thought that he hadn't noticed that it had violently started to snow. The wind whistled around him, but he took no notice. He just kept circling the pitch.

All of a sudden a huge gust of wind came upon him. Before he knew what was happening he was tumbling off his broom and down onto the ground.

* * *

Draco left the girls' toilet still thinking about Ginny. The weather outside was horrible so he decided to go outside. Draco had always been fascinated by winter storms. They took his mind off everything.

Once he had gotten out the front doors he started to walk towards the Quidditch pitch. There was rarely anyone out there, especially on a day like this. He was walking when he noticed something on the ground. He ran over and found that it was a person.

He pulled his wand out of his pocket and levitated the body back into the castle.

* * *

Ginny looked at Draco as he sat in the corner waiting for her to do something. Madam Pomfrey had gone out for a break, so Ginny was on her own. She felt Draco standing behind her.

"What should we do first?" he asked.

"Are you going to help me heal him?" she asked.

"Of course. I know how."

Ginny quickly said the spell that would tell all of his current injuries. That way she knew what to heal; she wouldn't have to check as she went. Both of his legs were broken and Draco went about healing them. Ginny rolled up the sleeve of his robe to heal his arm and found something that she wasn't expecting. Harry's arm was covered in cuts and scars. Ginny gasped and Draco turned away from his work.

"What's wrong?"

"Harry hurt himself, just like me." She said.

"So it would seem. But that isn't what is the most important right now. We just need to heal him; you can talk to him about it later."

"Right," Ginny said, healing some bruises on Harry's back,

Finally they had finished healing him the best that they could. Ginny sat down with a sigh and began to fill out some paper work. Draco just sat and looked at Harry's arm. How could perfect Harry Potter hurt himself? He had the perfect life, aside from having to live with muggles.

"I just can't believe it," Ginny said, walking back over.

"Maybe he doesn't actually do it and they just look like SI cuts," Draco suggested.

"Draco, look at them. It would be ignorant to think that they are anything else."

"Yeah, alright. Are you going to tell Potter that you know?"

"I guess I'll have to talk to him about it. I should really write it into his paperwork, but I won't."

"He will probably be getting up soon, so I'm going to go. Tell me how things work out."

"Alright, bye," Ginny said, sad to see him leaving.

* * *

Hermione was in Ginny's dorm. She knew that she shouldn't be, but she wanted to snoop a bit anyway, no one would find out. She couldn't believe that she was here doing this though, it just wasn't like her to look through other peoples' stuff. But, she just had to know what Ginny was cutting herself with so she could watch for it.

She opened up Ginny's trunk and looked through it, but found nothing. She found nothing in her bedside table or under he bed or pillow. Ginny must have it with her. Whatever it was, she had it with her.

Hermione left the room, she was disappointed about not finding anything, but at least she knew that no one in Ginny's dorm would accidentally come across it or anything.

As Hermione was leaving the room she saw Ron walking up the stairs.

"What are you doing up here Hermione? You know Ginny's in the hospital wing today."

* * *

Harry woke up soon after that to find Ginny staring down at him.

"Gin?"

"Oh Harry, you're up!" Ginny looked a bit flustered for some reason.

"What happened?"

"You fell off your broom, you were flying in the storm, and Draco brought you in. It took us a while to fix you up too, you were pretty beat up."

"Malfoy? He brought me in here?"

"Contrary to popular belief Draco is not a horrible person. He wasn't going to leave you out in the snow."

"Right. When can I go?"

"Probably in a couple of days. But Harry, before you can go, we have to talk."

"Ok, what's up?"

"We need to talk about the marks on your arms," she said.

"Oh, that," he said, turning quite pale.

* * *

"Well Ron, I could ask you the same thing right now. Why were you going up to Ginny's dorm?"

"I asked you first."

"Well, I was looking for Ginny. I forgot that she was working today."

"Oh, well I figured that she might be done by now."

"Right, well, I'll see you later then," with that Hermione ran off, both of them knew that the other was lying.

* * *

Draco was on his way into the dungeons when he saw Snape approaching him.

"Good afternoon Professor." Draco said.

"Good afternoon Draco. How are things?" Snape asked knowingly.

"Everything's fine. I was just on my way back from the hospital wing. Potter's there, he fell off his broom."

"Silly boy, flying in a storm," Snape muttered, walking away.

Draco began walking back to his dorm when he heard footsteps behind him. He turned, half-expecting Hermione this time. But to his surprise it was Ron.

"Malfoy I need to talk to you about my sister."

* * *

AN: well, I know you guys wanted a longer chapter, but it's 3:30am and I want to get this up now. I will start on chapter 16 right after I put it up though. I'll probably be up for a while, I haven't been sleeping much recently anyway, I might as well do something of value with this freetime.

Reviewer Response:

(For chapter 14)

Ashley- I'm glad that you don't plan to cut again, it's really rather horrible. I don't know if I'll have Hermione end up cutting, it's definitely something I've thought of, but I don't really want this story to go that way. I think I need to end it with none of them cutting, so it doesn't end up seeming like I'm encouraging cutting. Also, I don't think I could make them go to "the next level". I don't think I could write it. Plus this story isn't really a romantic story, it is, but that isn't the main plot.

SiNgSoNg24- Glad you liked it. Another chapter should be arriving pretty soon, especially if I continue to have trouble sleeping.

Arieanna- I'm glad you think so. Thanks for the hugs, hugs to you to. Well, that thing in my life didn't go the way I really wanted it to, but everything's ok for now. I'm just a bit worried for a friend of mine; he is in some trouble (understatement of the year). But yeah, I hope that you enjoy this chapter as well. I had some fun writing this one, don't really know why.

KaylaSummers- Snape will be appearing more. I tell you that he will. I haven't really decided what he's going to do, but I'm sure it will be important and to your liking. Did I update sooner this time? I think I did, but the chapter is shorter than last time.

FroZenInTiMe- Hermione is being…horrible, and I am having fun with it. I'm proud of Draco for being able to stop, Ginny will get there eventually. As for me, I'm at 32 days, 6 more to go until I hit my goal, then I can start looking forward to a cut-free future.

SandwichBitch- I liked Draco burning his knife too, I wasn't really sure I could get him to get rid of it permanently without just doing what Harry did, but I wanted it to be more…important than that. Thanks for the advice, its quite good. The thing about putting your knife outside, that's a really good idea, I never thought about that. I wish I had thought about it when there was snow on the ground, lol. I've been pretty careful about music lately actually, I've been watching for things that trigger me, especially on Mondays, I seem to have the hardest time not cutting on Mondays.

Muffin- You definitely haven't offended me in any way. I'm glad that my story made you want to review it. I've been told before by a couple of people that I seem older than 14. I myself feel like I've skipped a couple of years of my life, I think that the cutting actually did that to me. I know that not everyone who doesn't do it thinks its weird, but most people do. I don't think anyone, cutter or not, would react easily to it though. I'm sorry that I made you cry and I hope that I don't again. I am at 32 days so far and I can't wait for the next 6 days to pass so I can hit my goal date.

aVampireNamedNei- hey, it was nice talking to you online the other day (week?). I agree completely with what you said. Trying to make someone quit cutting probably promotes it more than this fic does. I might email you if I have the time, I don't get much email either.

CassieOwls- I'm happy you like the chapter. Sorry, I don't think that this chapter is as long as the last one, I'll try to make the next one longer. As for cutting, I highly suggest not starting because it's a horrible addiction and is very difficult to quit.

Kneh13- Hope you like this chapter. Well, Ginny is cutting a lot because I'm not. I've been writing about Ginny cutting a lot because I've really wanted to cut in the past 2 weeks. It's been hard, but I've stayed strong so far, 32 days!

(And for 7, 1 and 5)

Tigress247- Glad you're enjoying it. I hope that you can quit cutting. I'm pretty sure that I'm done with that part of my life. I figured that I should put "Don't read if it will trigger you" because I used to have a reviewer, she rather disappeared, who always told me that I should put a warning at the beginning of each chapter. I was always forgetting, so I just put a warning on the whole story and left it at that. Peace be with you too, I hope you liked this chapter.

Unbrokencandybar- I'm sorry that your friend used to cut, it really does suck, and hopefully she's stopped now. I don't think I would ever be able to take pills, I'd be afraid of overdosing, in a way I guess cutting is safer for me. Thanks for the compliments on my writing, it means a lot, I hope you like this one!

DustinWmew- I'm glad you like my idea. Yes, I suppose Draco wouldn't blab things, but, I can't really help it. I don't really know how else to say it. But its not like he's telling the whole world everything, just Ginny, everyone else just has a general idea. Also, maybe Draco just doesn't care, I dunno, look at it however you like. I hope you liked this chapter as well.

Well that's it for now. Wow, 13 this time. I've also gone over the 100-review mark, which is awesome. Thanks so much to all of you for your support in me. If it weren't for all of you I would probably be cutting again. You guys are so encouraging and I love you for it. Please write me another review, it really does help me get the chapter out faster because reviews put me in a good mood, therefore, I can write better.

Well, I'm at 32 days, 6 days away from my goal, wish me luck!


	17. Chapter 16

2008 edit - the only messenger that I use now is MSN, my email is flying (without any of the spaces) I also have facebook, you can email me if you want to add me and can't find me.

AN: Not sure how good the last chapter came out; most of it was written between 1 and 5 am. Hopefully this one will be better, and longer. You guys can feel free to email me or message me anytime you want. I'm on MSN, Yahoo, AOL, and ICQ.

MSN:

Yahoo: flyingzuccini

AOL: flyingzuccini148

ICQ: 304514923

MrsMunkee: Sorry I haven't replied to your latest email, I hope I get the chance to do so soon. Hopefully we can chat sometime soon as well.

Review Response:

Unbroken-candy-bar: Thank you for the reviews, and for the email. Thank you for congratulating me on my goal, I made it! I hope to hear from you again soon. I hope that you enjoy this chapter as well.

SandwichBitch: Yup, the trio is being silly, tiptoeing around, hoping they won't get caught. They're pretty much all up to something. I used your idea about the knife outside thing in this story, hope you don't mind. I don't know if that's why I have a worse craving on Monday's, its been suggested to me before, but I don't know if that's exactly why. Thanks.

GinnyWeasley888: Glad that you liked it. Don't kill me, I wouldn't be able to finish the story!

Frozen in time: Hermione is rather annoying me too. The thing is though, she isn't stupid, she's just being stupid. Ginny has taken more steps to quitting during this chapter. I reached my goal and I have decided to stop counting my days.

DiedbySuicide: I beat my goal! I'm happy that you enjoyed that chapter. I didn't think that the chapter would be very good, considering when it was written, but apparently it was fine. You can't quit cutting if you don't want to quit. Well, actually that isn't entirely true. When I quit cutting I didn't want to quit, I just knew that I had too. Eventually you will quit, I think everyone does eventually. Considering there aren't as many adults who cut as there are teens…

Markerglory: Thanks for being proud of me! I think that's the right word, even if it isn't, I know what you mean. 39 days and still going strong for now. I'm glad that you want to read this even though you could possibly be triggered into starting. I'm glad that you don't want to start though; I don't want to start again either. Gracias.

Totowizofoz: Yeah, it's easy to be triggered. So many things happen that should trigger me, but then something little happens and for some reason it's much worse. Don't worry about the fact that you cut again, just try to go for longer this time. I went for 37 days last time and I can't wait to get past that (May 6th! Coming up!).

Kneh13: thanks, I'm almost at my goal. On May 6th I will be at 38 days (my goal), I'm gonna drink lots of milk!

Tigress247: yeah, an amazing amount of people cut. I think it's something like 10 percent of people or something. A lot of people who self harm are not happy about the fact that there is no media content, and when there is it isn't very true. Most people think that people who cut are freaks, no questions asked. It's hard for people to understand when they haven't done it. I'm hoping this story helps people to understand it a bit better.

CrashCart9: 13 days is awesome! I was really happy about my first 10 days…then 20, I can't wait til 40. Before I quit cutting the most I went for was about 10 days at a time. Ginny has been cutting a lot, but I think the whole situation with Harry might knock some sense into her…Ugh; I hate people who judge people because of something like cutting or an eating disorder. I don't really have to worry about that, because no one at school knows…In fact, nobody knows, only people on fanfiction...net, fictionpress, psyke, and one of my friends on yahoo, and I like it like that.

CinnamonAngel: Yeah, I got like 20-30 minutes more sleep shortly after I posted the last chapter. Right now it's only…9:30, so I don't need any sleep for a while. Sniff Sniff, no more milk? Well…if you say so…RIGHT, I'm drinking it right now, lol. Don't think I could write anything without my milk fix. I'm glad that you like my story, although, I'm not really sure why, its not that good, I'm too young to really write anything that's worth much. I'm almost at 38 days, that's my goal; on May 6th I'm going to throw myself a little milk party or something. Everything is pretty much fine, I'm just worried about Chris. And I was a bit worried about you when I posted the last chapter, but I'm better now.

KaylaSummers: I haven't really decided on Harry's reaction yet. It will be a sort of spur of the moment thing. This whole story has been me deciding things on the spot. I always think about different things that can happen, but I never actually decide to make them happen until I am actually writing.

CHAPTER 16

Draco stared blankly at Weasley.

"You want to talk to me about my girlfriend?"

"She's my sister."

"I know that, you just have a strange way of showing that you care about her."

"I do care about her, that's why I've come to talk to you. She has been really distant lately and I want you to tell me why."

"I don't think its my place to say."

"Fuck you Malfoy! Tell me about what's going on!"

"Language Weasley," Draco said, mockingly shaking a finger at him.

"Just tell me everything that you know about my sister!"

"I think you should talk to her yourself. Now, if you'll please excuse me, I think I am going to make my way back to the hospital wing to see Ginny now," Draco said, turning and walking away.

"Stupid, fucking Slytherins…" Ron muttered storming away.

* * *

"Harry, have you been cutting yourself?"

"I guess there isn't any point in lying, because you'll just see right through it. The truth is that, yeah, I used to cut myself."

"Used too?"

"Yeah, as in I don't anymore."

"Oh," she said.

"Yeah, I used to, but then a couple of weeks ago I cut again, but now I've decided that I don't want to."

"Oh, ok, I won't put it in your file. You would definitely get questioned if I did."

"Thanks Ginny, but why are you being so nice about this? How did you even know that the scars were from self harm?"

"Well.."

* * *

Hannah looked around the room that she had been left in hours before. She thought that she would sleep in the dungeons or maybe with the house elves, she wasn't expecting this. The room was the finest room that she had ever seen. It was huge and very lavishly furnished. She would ask next time someone came to see her why she had been placed in such a nice room.

Just then Lucius Malfoy entered into the room.

"You're going back to school."

"Why?" Hannah asked, happily.

"I want you to keep a close watch on my son and report everything back to me."

"Oh, I guess I have to then?"

"You had better, or the consequences will be much worse than the task."

"Yes Sir."

"Master."

"Master?"

"Call me Master, you stupid girl."

"Oh, sorry, yes Master!" she said with sarcasm.

"You might want to watch your tongue missy, if you want to keep it."

* * *

"You don't have to answer if it's personal, Ginny," Harry said, obviously hinting that she should answer.

"Well, I might as well tell you, everyone will find out soon enough." Ginny said, what was that supposed to mean? Was she hinting about something that even she didn't know was going to happen?

"Well, if you want to tell."

"Well, I guess. The truth is that I cut myself as well."

"I know."

"You knew? Why didn't you tell me that you knew? How did you know? I thought I was careful."

"You were careful. I never would have known if I hadn't actually seen you doing it. I never thought you to be the type of person who would cut themselves."

"What exactly is the 'type of person' who would cut themselves?"

"I don't know, I just didn't think that you would."

"Well, you'd be surprised just how many people cut."

"Do you know any others?"

"Yeah, but, it's not my business to spread it around."

"Yeah, you won't tell anyone about this then?"

"No, I'm not a hypocrite, I wouldn't want anyone to know about mine, why would I tell other people about your's?"

Just then Draco walked into the room.

"Did you guys talk about it?"

"I thought that you wouldn't tell anyone else about it?" Harry said.

"I didn't, he brought you in here. He helped me heal you."

"Oh, well, I guess everyone's gonna know about it all now." Harry said.

"You think I'm going to tell everyone Potter?"

"Yeah, you probably would."

"Well, perfect, little, Potter. Contrary to popular belief I'm not exactly a hypocrite."

"What? Hypocrite? Are you saying…?"

"Yeah, I am," Draco said, rolling up a sleeve and showing Harry his scars.

"We ought to start a club or something." Harry said.

"No can do Potter, I quit," Draco said.

"So did I," Harry said, smiling.

Ginny slowing went back to the office to finish up the paperwork, she didn't really want to talk about quitting anymore.

* * *

Hermione sat in the library looking through a book on self injury. She had bought the book hoping to find out more about it, since Draco wouldn't tell her much.

"Hey Hermione," it was Ginny.

Hermione quickly closed the book and shoved it in her bag.

"What were you reading?"

"Oh, just studying."

"Oh, alright, I came here to study as well, maybe we could study together."

"Hello, ladies," both Ginny and Hermione turned around to find Hannah Abbot standing behind them.

"Oh, hello Hannah, welcome back to the school. Would you like to study with us?" Hermione asked.

"Yes, I was actually hoping that I could spend a bit more time with you two."

* * *

Snape was sitting in his office pondering what he knew. Draco harmed himself. Ginny was very good at healing. They were friends. Maybe Ginny was healing Draco. Or maybe Ginny was healing herself all of these years. Maybe that's why they had become friends, because they had that in common…

"Professor?" Draco said, entering the room.

"Oh, hello, Mr. Malfoy. What brings you here at this hour of night?"

"Really I just wanted to talk to you about what happened a couple of weeks ago."

"Oh, alright," Snape said dreading what he knew they had to talk about.

"I know that you helped Ginny heal me."

"I won't deny that I did."

"I know that you know that my father was the one who did it to me."

"I do know that. But don't worry, I won't tell your father that I know about it."

"Thank you, I also know that you know about my self injury."

"Yes, I know that you do that."

"Did."

"Did?"

"Did as in I quit a couple of weeks ago."

"Oh, that's good."

"I just wanted to tell you so that you wouldn't feel the need to tell Madame Pomfrey or Professor Dumbledore about it."

"Of course I won't."

"Thank you Professor."

Ginny was sitting in the dorm looking through a book that Draco had given her. It was called "100 Ways to Destroy Self-Injury". It was quite interesting and had lots of suggestions on how to keep herself from cutting. She was on the second page when she noticed something that could be helpful.

Rule #7 – Try keeping your knife and anything else that you might want to cut yourself with outside so that you would need to make frequent trips to get it.

Ginny decided that that would be a good idea. It would be a very difficult thing for her to do, considering she took her knife with her everywhere. She pulled her knife out of her purse and put it onto the centre of her bed. She also pulled her plain knife from her bedside table and put it on the bed with her knife. She pulled a small razor blade out of the sole of her shoe and a few more from the pockets of her robes. Finally she had everything that she could ever think of cutting herself with sitting on the middle of the bed. She was now ready to hide them all from herself.

* * *

Draco was sitting on the floor with his head against the couch when there was a knock on the outside of his door. He stood up and opened the door only to find Ginny standing outside it.

"Would you like to help me hide my blades?"

"What? How?"

"I'm going to place my blades around the inside of the school and some outside."

"Um, alright."

Draco didn't really understand why she wanted to hide her blades, but he figured he would help her anyway. He followed her outside of the school and watched as she started walking towards the forest.

"Are you mad? You want to walk right into the forest at this time of night?"

"I need to get these blades away from me." Ginny sadly placed her rose-covered knife underneath a large rock right near the front of the forest. Ginny hid a couple of her other blades around one of the posts in the Quidditch pitch. Finally she started walking back towards the school.

Draco jogged to catch up with her. He still didn't understand what she was doing. She place a razor in the hand of a suit of armor, no one would see it there.

"I'm done."

"What exactly were you doing?" Draco asked.

"It suggests hiding your blades outside in that book you gave me. That way, everytime I want to cut, I have to wait until a time when there are no people in the areas that I hid them in, most likely at night, when its cold."

"Alright, that makes sense I suppose."

"It definitely does."

"Well, if you're done with my assistance, I'm going back to bed."

* * *

Hannah sat back in her dorm. She felt horrible spying on her classmates like that. They all had no clue that she was doing this. She pulled out the journal that Malfoy had given her to write in. She wrote:

Journal:

I got back to school today and didn't really find out anything different today. Ginny Weasley is working in the hospital wing. Harry Potter was brought into the hospital wing today (unknown reason). Draco Malfoy spent most of his afternoon in the hospital wing (talking to Harry Potter?). Ginny and Hermione studied in the library.

Things to find out:

Why Harry Potter is in the hospital wing

Find out what Draco was doing in the wing

Find out what is going on with Ginny and Draco

Find out what's going on with Draco and Harry.

Should start on that tomorrow,

Hannah.

Draco walked outside in the cold weather, it must have been 3:00am. He walked all the way to the edge of the forest, where Ginny had stood hours before. He lifted the rock that her knife was under and pulled it out. He sat down on the rock and rolled up his sleeve.

* * *

AN: Well, that's the end of chapter 16. Hopefully I can get another chapter up soon before you all kill me. I don't really know how accurate my reviewer response things are because I wrote some of them a few days ago and I'm too lazy to change them. I beat my goal! I'm at 40 days now and I've decided to stop counting my days.

I wrote a large part of the last chapter in the middle of the night last time. I told myself that I wouldn't do that again this time, but, its now almost 2:00am, so I guess I did it anyway. I've found that in the last little while, late at night is really the only time that I can use the computer long enough to get anything out.

Chapters may start coming out less frequently because this time of year is the most difficult time of the school year for me.

Please review this chapter. I love getting reviews so much, it really brings my day up.


	18. Chapter 17

AN: Good things come to those who wait, right? Well, I'm waiting. Well, here's another chapter, hopefully I got this one out soon enough right?

Well, I've gone back to listening to Christian music while I'm writing, probably a good plan.

Review Response:

Fcukingcathy: I'm glad that you like the story. I try to update once every one or two weeks, so you can expect updates regularly. The plot is definitely thickening. Love your name by the way.

The blair bitch: Hello, thank you for the compliment. blush. I never realized that so many people cut themselves until I signed up for at psyke. I always though that it was something that a very small amount of people did. I think the stats are something like 1 in every 10 people or something like that. You're only 12? I'm 14, I've been told that I'm quite mature for my age, I think that I owe that to my cutting. I believe that it matures you very much.

FroZen In TiMe: Don't worry too much about Draco, he'll be alright. Ginny has definitely taken a big step forward, as have I. Thank you for your encouragement.

SandwichBitch: Yeah, I was going to try your method of hiding everything outside but I decided to just go to the extreme and just throw it all out instead. I used to write when my family wasn't home, but recently they're been home all the time, so I have to find other times to do it. I wouldn't want them reading all this, they would know EVERYTHING.

Terriah: Although you probably won't read this, thank you for the review. I sent you an email and I hope to hear from you soon.

Didobyrnes: Well, you may be right. Cutting doesn't need to be glorified. But, it isn't as if I'm portraying it as a wonderful thing that everyone should do. I don't think people should at all.

Kneh13: Glad you liked the last chapter. Thanks. Hope you like this one too! Sorry it took so long.

CrashCart8: Yeah, we will probably be seeing more of Hannah in the next few chapters, hope you don't mind that.

LoonyLunaPotter: Well, hopefully some of your questions will be answered. I don't really know what's gonna happen with Harry yet…

Writeronthego: Draco is my favourite character too. I probably will write more when school's out. But because I live in Canada, I don't get out until the end of June.

Kayla Summers: Hello, sorry for leaving this for so long. I just haven't been able to write that much lately. Hopefully I can fit some Snape goodness in soon.

MrsMunkee: Hello. Yeah, silly Draco, I felt bad leaving him like that. Reply to my email whenever, doesn't really matter.

ChaoticSlytherin: Hello, don't give up on Draco yet. I'm not really sure if Harry has anything to do with it, he may. Good luck with your finals.

Well, that didn't take as long as usual. I'm trying to keep them as short as possible, it just takes so long.

Anyway, this is chapter 17, I'm sorry it took so long to get out.

AN: Hmm, for some reason my little star things didn't show up last chapter…We'll see if they do this time, my apologies if they don't. Just…pretend that they do. A strange new character could make an appearance in this chapter…

CHAPTER 17

Draco was about to bring Ginny's knife down into his arm when he realized what he was about to do. He stood up quickly and her knife fell to the ground. He couldn't believe what he was about to do. But it had felt so right. The weight of the knife pressed against his hand, waiting to go into his flesh. He picked up the knife from the ground and again held it over his arm. If he cut he would ruin all the work he had put into quitting. He suddenly didn't care. He pressed the knife towards his arm. He was about to puncture the flesh when he heard something.

"Malfoy? What the hell are you doing? Stop that!" It was Potter.

"Leave me the hell alone Potter. I'm busy!"

"No, Malfoy drop the knife. You don't need it."

"Don't fucking tell me what I do and don't need thanks."

"You'll regret it."

"I regret a lot of things."

"Well, I can't let you do it," Harry said, snatching the knife out of his hand.

"Don't be stupid Potter! You of all people should understand that trying to make me stop will make it worse."

"It won't make it worse. In a few hours it will pass and you won't want to do it anymore. Come on, lets go waste a few hours so you can get over this."

"I don't want to spend "a few hours" with you Potter."

"Well, you're going to have to get over that."

* * *

Ginny wandered around the rock that she had put her knife under. She was sure that it had been there! She had just gotten her knife back and already it was gone! This was such a bad idea; she never should have hidden her knife so well. She just should have put it next to the school, not way out here. What was she going to do now? She couldn't remember where any of the other blades were.

She sat down on a boulder and picked up a rock. It had a sharp corner on it. She lifted up her sleeve and scraped the rock along her arm, not even bothering to wipe it off. She knew that it would be probably become infected because she was putting dirt into it by using a dirty rock, but she didn't care. For a few minutes she forgot about everything and just watched the thick liquid trail downwards.

* * *

"So Potter, what exactly can we do in the middle of the night?" Draco asked, annoyed.

"Well…Considering what I know about this school…we can do anything."

"How exactly can we do anything…There's nothing in this school except for empty classrooms…"

"That's not exactly true…Have you ever heard of the Room of Requirement?"

* * *

Ginny wandered back into the Common Room about an hour later. She started to walk up towards her dorm when she heard the floor creak behind her. She spun around the find Hermione standing at the bottom of the stairs.

"What are you doing up so late Hermione?" she asked her.

"I should ask you the same thing."

"I was out for a walk."

"Hmm, a walk, yes. Come Ginny…I think we need to have a talk."

* * *

"This is amazing Potter! How long have you known about this place?" Draco asked.

"We used it as a meeting place in 5th year."

"Well, come on! What are we waiting for?" Draco said grabbing a broom and soaring around the now huge indoor quidditch pitch.

Harry shrugged and grabbed a broom from the rack on the wall. He kicked off the ground and started to loop around in the air after Malfoy.

* * *

"Hermione what's going on? You've been acting strange lately."

"I've been acting strange? Hah!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I think you've been more out of character than I have, Ginny."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that ever since you've started hanging out with Malfoy you've been acting different."

"How different? As in I'm not the quiet little mouse of a girl that everyone thought I was? I changed a while ago Hermione; Draco had nothing to do with a lot of it."

"Well, Ginny, from what I've seen, you're a different person that I thought I knew. I think Draco probably has something to do with it."

"Yeah, I'm a different person, but that was caused by some other stuff."

"Like, what? You cutting yourself? What is up with that Ginny?"

"Cutting myself?" Ginny began to panic, "I don't cut myself!"

"You don't need to lie to me Ginny; I know that you've been doing it."

"How did you find out? Did Harry tell you? I'll kill him!" Ginny said running out of the Common Room. She had no clue where Harry was, but when she found him he was going to be in big trouble.

* * *

Hannah had been sitting in the bushes outside writing in her journal when she heard someone else come out of the school. She had quickly hidden her journal and hunched over, in case it was a teacher. But then she noticed that it was Draco and she relaxed.

She had watched him walk over towards the Forbidden Forest. She wasn't sure, but she thought that he had just picked up a large rock. Perhaps there was something hidden underneath. Hannah pointed her wand at her face and mumbled a spell to make her eyes act as if they had binoculars in front of them. She saw him reach for something on the ground and come back up with a knife in his hand. She watched him lift up his sleeve before she couldn't bear to watch him any longer. She ran into the school. She would definitely have something to tell his father now!

* * *

Harry and Draco were walking down the halls away from the Room of Requirement. It was nearly time for breakfast, so they were walking to the Great Hall. Harry could barely believe that he had just spent the last 5 hours with Malfoy, and he had actually enjoyed it.

As they walked into the Great Hall together every head in the room turned and looked at them in awe. It had been enough when Draco and Ginny had started hanging around each other. But Harry too?

"See ya Potter, and thanks." Draco said, turning to the Slytherin table.

"Bye Malfoy."

Harry turned away from the sneers and walked to his own table. He was greeted with a smack in the back of the head from Ron.

"What the hell are you thinking?" Ron practically yelled.

"What?" Harry asked innocently, he knew exactly what Ron was talking about.

"Malfoy! First Ginny and now you! What the hell is going on around here?"

"I was just helping Malfoy with some stuff. It would seem we have more in common than I thought."

Ron looked like he was about to say something else but he was quickly interrupted. Ginny had stormed over to the table and plonked herself down very ungracefully beside Harry. She turned and glared right at him. The look said 'we need to talk.'

Ron frowned at Harry and went on eating his breakfast. He and Harry would need to talk soon as well.

* * *

Draco watched as Weasley started to pester Potter. Probably for being seen with him. Suddenly Ginny brushed right past his table. She didn't even stop to say hello to him. She stormed right over to where Potter was sitting and thrust herself down next to him. Draco wondered what he had done to get Ginny so mad.

He stopped watching their table and focused on his breakfast. He wasn't really hungry, but he ate anyway. He hadn't been healthy lately and he needed to eat so he could feel stronger.

* * *

Hannah watched all of this going on silently from the Hufflepuff table. She had her notebook in her hand and was writing in it madly.

_Well, I didn't find out any of the stuff that I wanted, but I have seen some interesting stuff. _

_Last night Draco Malfoy was seen outside the castle. I saw him cutting himself on his left arm with a large knife._

_This morning Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter (who must be out of the hospital wing) came into the hall together. This caused a bit of a ruckus and Harry ended up being smacked by best friend, Ronald Weasley._

_Shortly after Ginny Weasley stormed into the hall and sat next to Harry. She seems to be mad about something. I'll look into that after breakfast._

·

* * *

Lucius slammed the book shut. Draco was cutting himself again. His son just couldn't get it through his dense head that he couldn't do that. He wouldn't allow it. Especially outside. If his son had to do this couldn't he do it inside where it was clean?

And associating with Harry Potter! He could hardly believe that when he read it. His son could not possibly be spending time with him. And what was this business with the female Weasley? His son should not be around Weasleys. Their poverty might rub off on him. The last thing Lucius needed was his son wanting to donate money to charities and things.

Lucius needed to put a stop to this soon.

* * *

"So why do we all have to stay after breakfast?" Ron asked Harry absentmindedly.

"I'm not sure. Something about a new student."

Ron was about to add something when Dumbledore stood up at the front of the room. It would seem that Ron was having trouble getting more than one sentence out without being interrupted.

"Good morning students." Dumbledore started out, "I'll keep this short because I know you are all eager to get to classes. I would like to introduce a new student to you all."

There was a small girl standing next to Professor Dumbledore. She had her head down and her black hair was hanging into her face. She was wearing pure black robes.

"This is Ashlyn Daromar. She is in her 6th year and has been sorted into Ravenclaw. I trust that you will all make her feel at home here at Hogwarts."

And with those last words the crowd in the hall started to leave to go to there classes.

As everyone started to leave Ginny realized that she still needed to talk to Harry. She turned around to where he had been sitting to find that he was gone. She would have to talk to him later, she thought as she walked to the Potions lab.

She sat through the class in silence. She new that Professor Snape was talking at the front of the room, but what he was saying wasn't really registering in her head. Finally the long, dull class ended and she made her way outside to her Care of Magical Creatures class with the Ravenclaws.

She listened to Hagrid's lesson for a few minutes, but after a while she started to zone out and daydream. Suddenly she realized that Hagrid was splitting them all up into pairs. She had been paired up with the new girl.

"Hi, I'm Ashlyn, or Ash," the girl told her.

"Hello, nice to meet you Ash, I'm Ginny," Ginny introduced herself, "I wasn't really listening, what are we supposed to be doing now?"

Ashlyn smiled and began to explain the lesson to Ginny.

* * *

Draco was watching the girl at the front of the room. There was something strange about her. He couldn't see her face because of the hair hanging in front of it. Suddenly she looked up and turned towards him. She looked right at him and he gasped. Her eyes were gold. Not brown, but a shocking gold.

She stared at him unblinkingly for a few moments before returning her gaze to the floor. Dumbledore finished talking and people started to get up and leave around him. Draco also left, deep in thought. There was something odd about that girl and he would find out what it was.

* * *

Wow, I'm so sorry that this chapter took so long to get out. I had some computer problems. I lost most of the chapter when the power went out about a week ago.

I know that this chapter is pretty short and uneventful, hopefully something interesting will happen soon.

Please give me some reviews. You can email me or message me if you want, all of my info is in my profile.

But yes, reviews are well appreciated.


	19. Chapter 18

AN: Well, hello guys. How are you all? I'm good, which is an all-time high for me for the last few months. I did some yoga today and it really cleared my head. Hopefully I can fill it back up with stuff for this story…

Reviews:

Cinnamon Angel: Hello! Thanks for the reviews here and on fictionpress. How is Chris doing anyway? I've been worrying and praying about him a lot lately. How are you? I've been praying for you, and Justin as well. I hope you're well, and I hope you enjoy this chapter.

Kneh13: Good thing you didn't have to wait too long. Hopefully I won't keep you waiting this time.

Devilsfire: Hehe, another one's hooked…It may be a little while before you find out who that girl is, but it will eventually add an interesting twist to this plot.

SandwichBitch: Glad you enjoyed it. I doubt anyone will find your knives outside, they would probably have to be looking for it. And, as for me throwing my stuff out, its not like I was throwing knives out, just a couple of razors and a pencil sharpener blade, nothing I can't replace…

Frozen In Time: Yes, Ginny is making progress, but she has a long way to go yet. Hannah is being stupid isn't she…but she is being forced…Lucius IS quite evil, we may have to do something about that…

Fcukingcathy: glad you liked it. Hopefully Ash won't end up being a Mary Sue, I think its too late in the story to really introduce something like that.

KaylaSummers: Well, that's not what I had planned for Ash, but that could happen…

Temptedbybeauty: Thank you, and wow, 4 months? That's awesome, I'm at 2 so far. Hmm, wouldn't it be interesting if JKR made one of the characters a cutter? She wouldn't though, considering kids read the books.

HarryHippie: Hello, glad you enjoyed the chapter. My gym mark went down a fair bit because I would never get changed for class because I didn't want anyone to see any of the scars on my legs. Lately I've been changing in the bathroom, no one seems to really care, I'm not the only one who does it.

Terriah: I'm glad you made it through the story without getting triggered. And no, I agree, life isn't as bad as I thought it was, there's a whole lot of good in it too. I always do keep my fingers busy as well. Something I've noticed is that I've started cracking my knuckles again, something I stopped doing last summer (about the same time I stated cutting…).

TheGrinch: Glad you think so. And no, I don't think I do know a Kattie Parshly. If I ever meet one I'll be sure to tell her hello though.

* * *

AN: Anyway, sorry this chapter took longer than I thought. I was expecting to get it out much sooner than this. Just wait though, I get out of school at the end of June and then there will be lots of updates from there.

* * *

CHAPTER 18

Ashlyn walked up to her dorm later that night. No one had needed to show her where it was, she had figured that one out on her own. She walked over to her clean, freshly made bed and started to mess it up. She ignored the weird looks the other girls were giving her. It drove her nuts to have things so neat.

She laid down on the bed with her shoes still on and thought about the people she had met that day. She had liked Ginny. She hadn't liked that Malfoy boy that she had smashed into in the hall. It was his fault anyway, he had been walking around in a daze.

* * *

5 hours earlier

Draco walked down the hall. He didn't know what his next class was and he didn't care. He was a walking zombie. Tired because of the night before spent with Potter. He wished that the idiot had just let him cut himself and end it all. But no, not stubborn Pott-

Suddenly he was shaken from his thoughts to find that he was on the floor. He looked up and saw a head of messy black hair. Potter? No, that new girl had knocked him down.

"What the hell are you doing?" He shouted in her face.

"Me? You smashed into me? What were you doing?"

"I was walking, if you so much as nudge me again, I'll hex you into the next eon." And with that he stormed away.

"Fine then," she said, walking the other way.

Draco walked away muttering to himself.

* * *

Present

Ashlyn laughed as she remembered arrogant Draco Malfoy muttering to himself. The other girls in her dorm were really starting to think that she was insane. Maybe she was. She laid down on her bed and slowly dozed into a light sleep.

* * *

Dream

The scene was familiar but new. She stood in the doorway of the Great Hall. There was no one in the room so Ashlyn left. She felt her feet pulling her towards the top of the castle. She opened a heavy door that led into a tower. There was a girl on the floor in the room crying. Her red hair was sticking to her face so Ashlyn couldn't see who it was. But she knew that it was Ginny Weasley.

Ashlyn went and sat on the floor in front of Ginny, who couldn't see her. Ashlyn noticed with a start that Ginny had a large knife in her hand. She was cutting open her wrist with it in long strokes. Ashlyn hadn't been expecting to see that.

The worst part of it was that Ashlyn could do absolutely nothing about it. She watched as Ginny grimaced in pain, the knife falling from her hand. Ginny slipped over sideways, unconscious.

Ashlyn heard the door opening before her and she saw Draco come into the room. Ashlyn moved to stand in front of Ginny, forgetting that no one could see her in this dream. Draco rushed over to Ginny's side and lifted her back into a sitting position.

"Ginny? Ginny? Please wake up!" he said rubbing the side of her face. "I can't lose you now. Not after everything…" He reached for his wand.

Draco placed his wand by Ginny's arm and whispered some words. Ashlyn watched as the gashes on Ginny's wrist slowly closed and looked like they were almost healed. Draco was too nervous at the time to do any better than that. Ginny's eyes fluttered open and then she passed out again. Draco fell to his knees and waited.

·

* * *

Ashlyn woke up with a start.

She looked around the dorm, wondering why it wasn't empty. Shouldn't everyone be gone for supper by now? She looked outside and found that it was dark. She must have missed dinner.

Normal people wouldn't be worried about the dream that Ashlyn had just had. But Ashlyn knew better. She saw things. Ever since she was little children had called her a witch because she could see things before they happened. Sometimes in dreams. Often she passed out and saw things. Sometimes she saw things in drawings or in writing. Sometimes she could look at something and know what would be happening in that spot later on. Sometimes she had visions when she was wide awake.

Ashlyn got up quickly and rushed out of the room, hoping that she could find that tower again.

Ginny ran into her dorm. There were other girls lying in their beds, but Ginny didn't care. She flung herself over top of her bed to her bedside table. She wrenched open the top drawer and felt around until she remembered that he knife was gone. She clenched her teeth and pulled out her wand.

"Accio knife," she whispered, praying that it could be that simple.

She smiled in surprise when she felt it slam into her hand, cutting the skin of her palm. She pocketed the knife and ran all the way up to the Astronomy Tower.

Once there she sat down in her usual spot. She lifted her sleeve up and examined her wrist for a moment. She had never cut herself on her wrists before and she was scared, she wanted to do it right. She placed the knife just below her hand and applied pressure to the blade. It sunk in and she held her breath. The pain was more than she expected. She raised the blade and gasped at how much blood was oozing out.

She sunk the knife in again, a little lower this time and a bit shallower. She dragged the knife across her arm. By now she had tears running down her face. She started to feel slightly light-headed, possibly from looking at so much blood.

She placed her knife in her shaking, left hand and put three more cuts into her right wrist. She quickly slashed lightly into her left wrist again. Suddenly the blood and the pain became too much and her world went black.

* * *

Earlier

Hannah walked down the hall. She was looking for Ginny. She had searched almost the whole school and was now heading into the library.

She found Ginny sitting alone in the empty library with her hair hanging all over a large book.

"Weasley," she said.

"Hey Hannah, come sit with me," Ginny said, ignoring the fact that Hannah never called her by her last name.

"Now tell me Weasel, why would I want to do that?"

"Hannah, is something wrong?"

"No, its perfectly peachy, perfect little Weasley."

"I'm anything but perfect Hannah."

"Well, you could have fooled me," Hannah said sarcastically.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well, everyone knows that you're fucking Malfoy. Everyone also knows that you're only with him because of his money. Get tired of living in your own shit, Weasley? Sharing bath water with all 30 of your brothers?"

"Well, first of all I only have 6 brothers and second-" Ginny found that she couldn't continue and she ran from the room.

* * *

Harry wandered the halls later that day. He was sort of confused. Earlier that day Ginny had stormed into the Great Hall and plonked herself down at the table. She had seemed mad about something or another. He found out later what it was.

"Harry!" Ginny shouted catching up with him in the hall.

"Hey Ginny what's up, is something wrong?"

"You know exactly what's wrong you little bastard! I trusted you! This is how you repay me?"

"Ginny, what are you talking about?"

"You betrayed my trust Harry, how could you do that?"

"I didn't, I swear, what are you talking about?"

"Maybe you should think about me before you decide to blab all my secrets to your little girlfriend!"

Now Harry was looking for Hermione, hopefully she could tell him what Ginny had meant. Obviously something had happened between Ginny and Hermione that morning. Harry needed to find out what it was before Ginny decided to kill him.

He entered the library. It looked normal. Harry saw Hannah sitting at a table reading a thick book and he waved. He saw Hermione reading an equally large muggle book. He went and sat down beside her. She didn't even notice because the book was so large. Harry looked at the title of the books and just about fell out of his chair_. "Self-Injury Guide for Friends of the Self Mutilator."_

"Oh hi Harry, just doing some reading to see how I can help Ginny."

It seemed this would be easier than Harry thought.

* * *

Draco was walking when he felt a slight twinge in his wrist. _Ginny? Where are you? _He thought. He was worried about her. He hadn't seen her since breakfast and he wondered what had happened to her. She had stormed into the Great Hall this morning, it seemed she was mad at Potter.

He made his way up to the Astronomy Tower. He knew Ginny well enough to know where she went when she was upset. He eased open the door and was surprised to find Ginny lying on the floor surrounded by blood.

"Shit, Ginny? Ginny wake up!" he said, running over to her.

He lifted her limp arm and started to try and heal the gashes on her arm. His hands were shaking so he wasn't doing a very good job. When he was finished he could still see the gashes faintly, shining on her wrist, He wiped the blood off her wrist so he could get a better look. He looked higher on her arm and saw three infected cuts.

He heard her moan and she started to open her eyes. He called her name but she slumped over again. Suddenly he heard the door open behind him and he turned to stare into a pair of gold eyes. Ashlyn had come in.

* * *

AN: I'm sorry this chapter is so short and I'm sorry it took so long.

Truth is I haven't had the chance to write anything in about a month. I've been feeling very sick for a long time. I stayed off school for a week two weeks ago and than spent three days in ICU at the hospital and three more in a pediatric ward. According to my mother I almost died. I nearly went into a coma (good thing I didn't or this update might have taken much longer). I have type 1 diabetes now and I've spent the last week and a half adjusting to it. While I was in the hospital I had diabetic ketoacidoses which I don't really want to explain right now. I really didn't feel like writing and I didn't have word at the time anyway.

And then, I couldn't write yesterday because I couldn't move my right hand. A couple days ago we had a bulk garbage day in my neighbourhood. My friends and I have a room in my garage that we are slowly filling up with furniture. We found a huge record player/stereo and were carrying it back to my house when the thing tilted and the lid flew up. I put my hand on it to keep them from dropping it and got the side of my hand wedged between two pieces of wood. I ripped a bunch of skin of the side of my hand and I gouged a nice big hole in it. It bled the whole way home and all over the floor in my kitchen and bathroom. Three paper towels, too alcohol swabs, three cotton balls and four bandaids later it was fine. Then last night it started bleeding again and its killing me right now. So, I'm just praying that it doesn't get infected.

Now that I'm done rambling, please review. :D


	20. Chapter 19

AN: Hey guys, how goes it? School's been out for a week, grade 8 grad was fun. I haven't written anything but poetry this last week. I've been pretty busy. Andrea and Tyler have come over almost everyday since grad. And yesterday I did something I never thought I would do. I told them that I used to cut. Tyler asked me a question, I don't remember what, and then he said "What were you doing to yourself? Were you cutting your wrists?" and before I could help myself I said "Well, no, not my wrists exactly." So everything's out now. I found out that both of them have tried it before as well. Tyler cut himself a bunch during April and Andrea tried it at the beginning of this month. She didn't like it, she said it hurt too much and the blood grossed her out. Tyler still cuts himself occasionally. He had this cut on his arm that looked…strange. After I told him everything I asked him about it and he said that he had done it himself. I hope he doesn't do anything again. I never realized how stressful it can be worrying about people…

Review Responses:

From last time…:

TheForgottenFate: I'm glad that I've caught your interest. Sorry that I didn't reply to your review after the last chapter, after I got home I just wanted to get the chapter up as soon as possible.

Markerglory: Sorry I didn't reply to this in the last chapter, but I didn't go back and add in the reviews that came through while I was in the hospital. Thanks for being worried about me. I haven't been triggered, far from it! I feel great right now in fact. I haven't been this happy in months.

And now:

Celtrasa: I hadn't planned on making Ashlyn Draco's owl…but…that is a good idea. If I get a better suggestion than what I have in mind I will definitely consider it.

Kneh13: Hello, thanks for the review. Glad you're still enjoying the story. Sorry the last chapter took so long. Hopefully this one and the ones in the future won't be so far apart.

Terriah: Thanks. I'm glad your friend is doing well. I'm pretty well adjusted to it now, it's just sort of a pain in the bum. I've been feeling sick for months, so right now I feel great. Not that much has changed, it seems to affect my family and friends more than me. I've noticed that diabetes is a lot more common than I thought. I heard a girl behind me at the movie theatre a couple days ago talking about carbs and sugar…I've talked to two guys who both have best friends that have it. I was also talking to a younger kid at the park near my house who has had it for two years.

Reader: I'm doing fine, thanks. My hand is feeling much better, it's stopped bleeding every time I accidentally hit it or something, so that's good. It just kind of throbs now. Hopefully you'll like this chapter.

HiddenTales4evea: I hope you get this chapter before you go to Denver, if not, I hope you had fun! Well, in this story I don't really know what Ginny is short for. If her full name has been said at all in the story it would have been short for Virginia. But now, I've recently read an interview with JK and apparently it is supposed to be short for Ginevra, so, I think I'll just leave it as Ginny.

Brooksbabe1062: Wow, that sucks for your boyfriend. I told my two closest (and pretty much only) friends that I used to cut yesterday. I was so glad when neither of them called me a freak after. I was so scared that I would scare them away.

SandwichBitch: Glad you liked it. It will probably be jumping around between people a lot from now on, just because there are so many characters to keep track of.

Fcukingcathy: Glad to hear you liked the chapter. Hopefully this update is sooner than the last one was.

AN: I've noticed that my stars aren't showing up. I'll keep putting them in anyway, they leave a huge space, which should be good enough.

* * *

CHAPTER 19

"Ashlyn! What are you doing here?" Draco asked, frustrated because she had interrupted him and also because he couldn't remember her last name, thus forcing him to address her nicely.

"I'm here to help you save Ginny's life!"

"But…How did you-"

"I'll answer your bloody questions later, right now, we need to get her to the hospital wing."

"I…don't think that's a good idea…"

"Malfoy, don't be stupid! She's dying here!"

"I know, I think we should just take her to my dorm. If we take her to the hospital wing, they'll know that she cuts…"

"Ok, but we had better be quick. Come on!"

"It's after curfew, so there shouldn't be anyone around to see us."

"Ok, Damnit, let's just go!"

Draco carefully lifted Ginny from the floor and left the room with Ashlyn right on his heals. They ran silently through the halls for a long time. The Astronomy Tower was about as far away from Draco's rooms as you could get in the hospital.

"We're almost there," he said to Ashlyn, turning around.

When he turned back around he smashed right into a tall figure.

"Lumos," He heard a deep voice say.

"Professor Snape…" Draco said.

"Mr. Malfoy, Miss Daromar, what are you doing out this late?" he asked shining his wand in their faces. It was so dark that he must not have been able to see Ginny.

"Professor, we're sorry for being out so late but-" Ashlyn started, but was cut off by Snape.

"Is that Ginny Weasley? What the hell has happened to this girl?"

"She tried to kill herself Professor, we need to get her down to my rooms. We cannot take her to the hospital wing." Draco said firmly.

Snape looked at them long and hard and finally nodded.

"I'll come with you," he said, walking away.

Ashlyn and Draco rushed to catch up with him, thankful that he understood.

They quickly ran to Draco's dorm and Draco babbled the password at the painting, not even thinking about the fact that Malfoy's did not babble. He laid Ginny down on his bed and quickly tried to heal the cuts on her wrist a little better than he had the first time.

Professor Snape leaned down beside him and began to help him.

"You know, its no use. She isn't going to wake up like that. We need a potion." Ashlyn stated.

"I think you may be right…Hmm, Miss. Daromar, can you quickly run up to my potions lab and get something for this. I'm sure you can find something that will do the trick. Please be quick and very quiet. There's no telling what my happen if you were to be caught."

* * *

"Hermione, why are you reading that?" Harry asked her.

"I want to help Ginny, Hannah lent me this great book!"

"I don't think you can figure out a way to help Ginny by looking through a book, its just something that you do according to your instincts."

"Yes, but Harry, do you know what she does to herself? She CUTS herself. Its just so wrong, I have to do something about it."

"Hermione, the only reason you think its wrong is because you don't really understand it. Maybe instead of reading Hannah's book you should be reading a book on why people self-harm."

"Harry, self-harm is disgusting, and I don't know why people would want to cut themselves."

"People cut themselves for the same reasons that people burn themselves or starve themselves. There are so many different kinds of self-injury. I think you need to talk to Ginny about this and try to understand what she's going through."

"But Harry, she isn't really going through anything! Except for her brother dying, but that's no reason to hurt herself!"

"Hermione, I know that you're just trying to help, but for someone who is as smart as you, you sure are being ignorant!" Harry told her as he walked out of the room.

Harry was fuming by the time he had left the library. He was so mad at Hermione for not understanding.

He was just down the hall from the library when he noticed that the lights were starting to shut off in the hall. He hadn't realized how late it had gotten while he was arguing with Hermione. He noticed that he was hungry and decided to head down to the kitchen for a snack

He was walking through the dungeons as fast as he could. He didn't want to get caught out of bed. He was almost at the kitchen when someone smashed into him, knocking him right off his feet.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" Ashlyn said as she picked herself up off the ground. "Let me help you up," she said extending her hand.

"Hey, what are you doing running around down here at this time of night?" Harry asked her.

"I…Um, need to go and fetch something for Professor Snape," She said a little to quickly.

"Oh, well I left something in the lab earlier, that's why I'm down here," he lied, "I'll come with you so I can get it," Harry wasn't sure why he was so interested in what this girl needed, but he really just wanted to know.

"Um, ok then," she said nervously, "Come on, lets hurry." She said, walking down the hall.

Harry ran to catch up with her. What was the rush? The got to the potions lab fairly quickly and Ashlyn started rummaging through the potions cabinet in the back of the room.

"Are you stealing something or did Professor Snape really send you?"

"He really sent me, I'm looking for a healing potion," she blurted out, not thinking about what she had just told him.

"Who does Professor Snape need to heal? One of his precious Slytherins? I wouldn't bother if I were you, why doesn't he send someone from his own house?"

"Because everyone is sleeping. And it isn't a Slytherin, it's a Gryffindor."

"Gryffindor?" Oh God…Ginny. "It wasn't…It wasn't Ginny Weasley was it?"

"Yes, actually it is, now if you'll excuse me, I'm rather busy." Ashlyn said, getting frustrated with his pestering.

Suddenly she felt someone brush against her and she realized that Harry was also looking at potions with her now.

"What are you doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm looking for a potion!"

"Oh, I found it! Come on!" she said, forgetting that he wasn't supposed to be coming with her.

The two of them ran through the halls back to Draco's dorm. Ashlyn told the password to the painting and they rushed into the room.

Harry saw Malfoy and Snape leaning over Ginny. Ashlyn rushed over to them and thrust the potion into Snape's hand.

"Perfect!" he said, propping Ginny's mouth open.

He poured the green liquid down her throat. After he had emptied the vial he sat back away from Ginny. Slowly Ginny opened her eyes and looked around in a daze.

"Draco? What's going on? Professor Snape? What are you doing here?" She obviously couldn't see Harry and Ashlyn behind them.

"Its ok now, you're going to be alright Gin," Draco told her, caressing her forehead lovingly.

"Wait, I should be dead!"

"If it weren't for Ashlyn and Professor Snape you would be." Draco told her.

"Well, its not like you did nothing Malfoy," Ashlyn said, smiling.

"Well, Potter, Daromar, I suggest that you go up to bed. I'm sure Malfoy can handle this until morning." Snape said briskly.

Ashlyn opened her mouth to say something but Harry grabbed her arm and started to pull her out of the room. Snape following them out, shutting the portrait behind him. Ginny and Draco were alone again.

"Ginny, why did you do it? Why did you try to commit suicide?"

"I don't know Draco…I just couldn't take it…I don't know how to explain it." She started to sob.

"Its alright Gin, I know. I know why, I've been there too." Draco gave Ginny a hug and rubbed her back until she fell asleep on him. He laid her down on his bed and stayed up all night, watching her.

AN

Well, I'm sorry that this chapter is so short, and that it took so long to get out.

I've been so busy recently. I haven't had a free day since I got home from the hospital. Things have just been crazy. I've finally gotten myself a boyfriend, that's definitely something new for me. The best thing about it is, is that its Tyler, I've known him for a while and I've liked him for nearly four years. He was one of my close friends before we started going out, and now its even better. We been together for just over two weeks now.

But, also, things haven't been all wonderful. I almost cut myself on Friday, and then again today. I feel sort of stupid about it now.

I almost cut on Friday because I went bowling. I was at the bowling alley and I just got really upset and suddenly got the familiar urge to cut. I went bowling a lot in February (that was when I cut the most) and being there made me remember that. For some reason I got the same fake impression that cutting would help me that I used to get. I know it really doesn't help, but sometime I just really think that it will. Today…I don't really want to get into it. I'm just glad that I didn't have access to a blade earlier, or I would have cut myself up pretty bad.

Anyway, I'm babbling, and I highly doubt you guys wanna hear about my problems.

So, please review and, if you want to, please email me. I'd like to know how you really feel about this story on a more personal level. I would also just love to hear from you. I never get emails, just junk mail and forwards. Anyway, I need to go take my evening insulin shortly, so I need to post this now.


	21. Chapter 20

AN: I'm so sorry that the last chapter took so long to get out, I hope this one doesn't take as long, and if it does, I hope its longer than chapter 19.

Thanks for all the reviews. I sort of want to just write the chapter so I'm only going to reply to the ones with questions in them.

Transatlanticism- oopsâ€blush my mistake.

Aly – Thanks for all the reviews. My hand is all better now!

Celtrasa- Yeah, I hope that it lasts a while between us. I've liked him for four years afterall.

Starlett13 – Thankyou for that big review that you left me. I'm glad to see that I'm not alone in the world like I thought that I was.

Mary – Thanks so much, you really made my day with that review, I agree with you totally.

Thanks to the rest of you as well.

CHAPTER 20

A few days later Ginny was fine and was back to attending classes. She had decided not to use a glamour charm on herself. If someone had a problem with her self injury then that was their problem, not hers.

She sat through her potions class and just watched Snape. She had a new respect for the older man who had helped save her life. She wanted to thank him, but she wasn't sure if it would be appropriate to do it.

At the end of the day Ginny didn't even go to see Draco, she walked right into Snape's Potion Lab.

"Professor, I-"she said as she came in.

"Its alright Miss. Weasley. I wanted to help really."

"I just wanted to thank you. If it weren't for you I'd be dead right now."

"My pleasure," he said, turning back to his marking. Ginny smiled and left the room. The older man would never change.

* * *

Hermione walked down the hall again. She was looking for Ginny everywhere, she knew that she had already been down this hall at least twice. Where on earth was Ginny? Hermione was finally going to confront Ginny on what she did.

Hermione was so lost in her thoughts that she almost missed the flash of read going around the corner in front of her. She started to walk faster.

"Ginny!" she called, "Wait!"

Ginny stopped and turned around.

"Hey, Hermione, what's wrong?"

"Um, can we talk?"

"Yeah, sure, whats up?"

"Um, can we go somewhere more private?"

"Uh, yeah sure, lets go to the Astronomy Tower," Ginny said.

The two girls walked up to the Tower. Ginny pushed open the large door and walked into the room. Ginny went and sat on the floor on the opposite side of the room where she had sat the night before. Hermione sat beside her.

"I know."

"You know what Hermione?"

"I know that you cut yourself."

"Oh, How did you find out?"

"I found a book in your room and I..I read your journal."

Ginny was angry, but only for a moment, she knew that Hermione was only concerned.

"Well, yeah, I do cut myself. Or rather I did"

"You did? As in, don't anymore?"

"Yeah, I almost died last night because of it. I'm not ready to die, I know that now. I always thought that my cutting was the safest thing that I did. Now I know that its not, it's the most dangerous. I always thought that cutting was my way of controlling things. But now I know that I can't control it. Things can get carried away, and then I have no way of stopping them. Right now, I know that cutting is not going to do me any good anymore. I don't need to do it now. And I certainly don't need this."

Ginny walked across the tower to where her knife sat. She looked at it for a moment before picking it up. It felt so familiar in her hands. She lifted it and drew one last cut across the palm of her hand, she wanted a scar to remember this day by. She heard Hermione gasp behind her. Ginny raised her wand to the knife and said the spell that would banish her knife forever.

Ginny sighed with relief. She was so glad that it was all over. She knew that what she had said to Hermione was true, she didn't need to cut anymore. It was something that was definitely behind her.

Hermione crossed the room with tears in her eyes. She pulled Ginny into a hug. She had never been so proud of someone in her life.

"Come on," she said, "Let's go tell Draco."

Hannah walked into the Ministry of Magic. She had thought long and hard about what she was about to do. She knew it was the right thing to do. Lucius Malfoy should not be allowed to get away with the things that he did, she would not be a part of it.

She knew that what she was doing had the potential of getting her killed by Lucius' followers, but she didn't care. She was sick and tired of what she was doing for him, and it had to stop. It was time to put Lucius where he belonged.

"Yes, Minister, thank you for having me today. I really need to tell you some things about Lucius Malfoy"

* * *

Draco sat in his dorm. Ginny had just told him that she never wanted to cut again. He was so proud of her. He hoped that she would stay strong with her new found opinion about cutting. He hoped that he could be as strong as her, and keep himself alive for as long as possible. Well, he'd just have to live life one day at a time

* * *

AN: well, yes, that's the end of the story. I'm sad to see it end, but I'm also glad that its over. I've been in a bit of a writer's block for the past 5 months or so (which is why there was no update all summer, sorry about that).

Thank you so much to everyone that ever reviewed this story, or encouraged my writing. Without all of your encouragement and faith I never would have made it through the last 5 and a half months without cutting myself (I can't believe its been so long!). Its amazing. Thank you all so much. I hope you check out my other story.

Oh, and yeah, I know it seems like I just threw Ashlyn into the story, which I sort of did. But the truth is, I'm writing another story about her right now (shh, it's a secret) its sort of a prequel to this story. I'm not sure if it will ever get posted or not. If it does, it probably won't be for a while. I want to write a few chapters of it first before I post it and right now it only has one unfinished chapter.

So yeah, hopefully none of you are too sad to see this story come to an end. It ended happily right? No one died! Anyway, yeah. I hope that all of you are doing well. I hope that those of you who cut can find the strength to eventually quit. I hope the those of you who have quit cutting or are trying to quit can have the strength to stay without it. I hope that those of you who have friends who cut can help them to stop as well. And, for those of you who don't cut, please, never start. It's the biggest mistake that I ever made in my life and you don't need it too.

2008 edit - ok, so it's really over this time. The story is fully edited and is (hopefully) free of typos and inconsistencies. I love this story, it will always be close to my heart.

Kind of funny...I said at the beginning of this story that I hope my relationship with Tyler lasts...Well it certainly has. We're still together, 4 years later, are very much in love and are planning on moving out together later this year.

If anyone wants to send me an email please don't hesitate. Send me a private message on or send it to flying (without the spaces).


End file.
